Also next time she comes out to yell at you about anything just crow as loudly as you can without listening to her or letting her get a word in and just keep crowing, go about your business as you would but keep crowing until she goes back in the house. Tell your husband to do the same. There is no working with this beast of a woman and you shouldn't listen to one more word coming out of her. Just crow so loudly every single time she comes out to squawk at you! And when she cranks her music up, crank up your loop of Spock crowing and crow loudly right along with it all. I can't stop thinking about this absurd woman, I am sorry you have to live next to her.
don't forget to ruffle your hair and flap your wings while you're crowing.Psychotic and mean!
This is perfect, not as complicated as the chicken suit, no planning ahead, just do it when she approaches you. You should never try to explain yourself to her, she doesn't care. Look out for yourself from now on, don't take any of her feelings into account, she certainly hasn't done that. You and your DH need to watch out for yourselves.