Things you never said until you had chickens.......

[harryhoward]

I'm going to lock up the kids, the ones that know what time to go to bed.

 

[ernndbrtt]

"I'm turning the spare bedroom into a nursery for the baby chicks."

"Honey, naming the rooster will be easy but how in the world are we going to name 16 hens?"

"Harley (our 5 year old boxer), stop licking your chops, they AREN'T chicken nuggets."

"Stop pecking at my freckles, they aren't food."

"Well, aren't you being a mean little pecker this morning." Said to our roo when he was pecking one of the other chicks.

"It's not fun cleaning poopy chick bottoms and I don't think they enjoyed it either."

"Mom, I can't talk right now, I have to check the chicks for pasty butt."

"Ah crap, one of the chicks just pooped on me, at least it looks good."

"Come here little fuzzy butts, come to momma, I want to take pictures, so I can show you off on Facebook."

 

[Windee]

been lurking here for the last few months learning and such, you folks are far too funny, never understood 'chicken lingo' till now lol, I am a first time proud Mama to 14 RIRs (2 1/2 weeks old), my contribution to the thread thus far

...... oh crap, well I already have poop on me I'm not changing now

....... ummm I am not food, don't eat the Momma

...... Ringo (my dog), don't eat the nuggets (my chicks) lol

...... spill my beer and you will be swimming with the dumplins!!

 

[annabell254]

mmm, hurry girls! pluck, pluck, pluck, GIIIRRRLS.... I see a big, fat, yummy bug! you had better hurry before the fatso's get it

(my two HUGE, FAT, Cornish crosses...they must be 10lb at only 4 months and come running like dinosaurs if they so much as hear the door squeak ...and eat everything in sight...so I try to point out yummy stuff to the other girls when the dinos are not around haha)

 

[chickenzoo]

I had to pen up my free ranging house Silkie because she started tearing up the loose ends of the carpet......

 

[ladychicken&Ducklover]

" Ahhhhh, Millie LOVES having her beard and muffs tickled ".

" Susie just ate a fat , juicy lizard "

" Monica , I know you just discovered your wings , but get your
little fuzzy butt back to bed "!

 

[cate0404]

Said to a five year old - "No, we are not putting the baby chick in the oven we are putting the frozen chicken breast in the oven" Said after I had yelled out to my daughter, "Put the chicken in the oven would you?" and he ran off crying to stand in front of the brooder box with his arms out wide to protect them.

Some absolutely hilarious things on this thread!!!!!!

 

[cate0404]

Me to my mother today, actually...

Me: "MOM! Lucky's finally hatched a chick, but it's all yolkie and stuff..."
Mother: "Ugh...fine! I'll get the toothbrush and the facecloth."
Me: "Don't forget the feed, the tupperware container, the bread, and the cup with warm water!"
Mother: "Yup, yup..."
Me: "And can it be my brother's toothbrush?"

XD

LOVE LOVE LOVE this one laughed so hard I cried!!!

 

[onedoodle3]

"That's a steel toed boot! You cannot eat it!" Said after Jumper (aka Momma) tried to peck my steel toed boot.
"Get off my back! That's not a roosting post!"

 

[LizzieJ]

I grew up in the city and i never thought i would be saying the following
"babe did you put the girls to bed? did kookie give you the run around again? (cue giggling because she always does)
No Agnes you cannot eat my hair!
Penny if you dont stop picking on Florence im going to put you on the naughty step!
Daisy (duck) if you dont shut up you're going in the pot my girl!

Every thing i see can be translated into either a good hen house or a not so good one, my husband is convinced that i am chicken obsessed!

Yes darling of course i will stop at just these 4 chickens...........................8 weeks later.................but darling our girls are getting lonely we need some new friends for them!
No darling i promise i wont get any more (now at 11 chickens and 3 ducks)..................2 weeks later..................you know donald could really do with a wife of his own....................on purchasing donald a wife...................it would be a shame to leave that poor little girl there..................no it wont hurt for jim to have two wives...............ok darling i promise this is the end now no more.............................
and a post on my fb yesterday....................YAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY my chickie doo's have stopped being drama queens and started laying again!!!!!

My name is liz and i am an addict lol!