If you want a milk goat you are going to have to milk her. If you don't you can continue to let the baby do the job for you. You could keep the baby separate, put the doe on the milking stand, and only then let the baby nurse. At least that way she would at least get used to the milking stand...
I had a dairy so my view may different than yours. Some of my goats were friendly and some of them were not. I just put them on the stand and milked them. I didn't have time to coddle them. Sometimes it was a bit of a rodeo, but they learned the routine and got over it. I missed it but what...
Alfalfa pellets should not cause the goats to bloat. At times I used to feed them free choice. The only thing about alfalfa pellets is that they have to have access to roughage too. Holding her feet down? I never did that. If you milk her twice a day and she gets grain only at milking time she...