My Chickens All Disappeared!

[Annabella]

JetBlack you recount the days happening so well

I have never laughed so much

through a thread as I have this morning - write the book I'll be the other buyer

 

[JetBlack]

Quote:
Woo hoo!!!! I'm up to two! Thanks Mom!

 

[Minniechickmama]

If you sign a copy for me, I will buy one too, Bro

 

[JetBlack]

From what I understand, hilarious books do not sell so well. Some do okay, but mostly, not great. Dave Barry, Erma Bombeck, Terry Pratchett. They all made a good living, certainly (and every day I fantasize about not working with idiots anymore!) but humor held them back. Some write so well, I have to put the book down, because I am laughing so hard, I can no longer read. Patrick McManus is like that. Such self effacing humor and being the butt of your own jokes.... Other people tell me "I don't get why you like that author. I couldn't finish his book."

:0

I'd have to write in a special character, just to get the jokes out of my system. I think holding in jokes gives you hemorrhoids, pimples and varicose veins and I don't want that. And how's this; my girlfriend does not think I am funny. Vain and prideful, yes. Funny? No.

I really appreciate that you guys enjoy my work and I will try to keep it up. Thank you for encouraging me to write a book. Encouragement moves me forward.

Can you imagine how great it would feel to quit your crappy, hard, non-enjoyable job (and here's something I look forward to almost more than anything else) ....never needing your re'sume' again? I would print out a copy and then shred it, just to watch. To me, that would feel so great. Goodbye list of certifications and licenses! I'll never need you again. Maybe I'd shred it and then burn it, or line the chicken coop with it (BTW, that works great for pictures of your ex-'s).

I would sign autographs with elaborate messages in them. "[insert name here] I could not have done it without you. Your encouragement, during my incarceration, was invaluable. By the way, I never thanked you for the bail money. She looked 18, to me." I figure that way it's more interesting and if the books were ever worth anything (hopefully not slightly less with my signature on them), every one that goes up for auction will be a little different.

 

[Minniechickmama]

Jet, you want a good belly laugh from a womanly point of view? Have you ever read The Sweet Potato Queen's books? Stomach ache funny there! Jill Connor Brown is the author.

 

[JetBlack]

I will check that out. I am auditioning for another author, since Michael Crichton had the discourtesy to die. I feel let down that I will never read a new book of his. When I read "Pirate Latitudes" I told a co-worker "I hope he writes a bunch more posthumous books!"

 

[PineappleMama]

You saw Pinky and the Brain right.... well welcome to Wingy and the Grain...