Daughter broke up with boyfriend and I'm the one depressed!

[Bleanna]

That statement was a little dramatic. My life isn't over but I am hurting terribly right now. Not sure where to turn or what to do. I constantly cry, am sick to my stomach and am having a hard time functioning. I would like to fast forward about 5 years and see where things end up. I am sorry to sound psycho . . . I am usually strong and seem to have it together . . . on the outside anyway

 

[connie1966]

I understabd trust me read my posts i was losing it crying everyday for 1/12 years! Its hard its heartbreaking but you cant let it affect your life you just need toaccept the reality of the situation, try to distract yourself and try to move on because they will both be moving on and you will be suffering for nothing! Its so not worrh it trust me! My x son in law called me a psycho!! I mourned him for so long loved him so much and he thinks im a psycho! You have to focus on your daughters hapiness and thats it, and on another note u seem miserable with your husband just leace him im sure your daughter feels it and thats why shes not comfertable being home with you guys! I think its better having one happy parent then two unhappy ones just my two cents

 

[Bleanna]

Wouldn't it be nice to turn the clock back about 10 years and know what we do now! I have thought about leaving and so has he, it's just easier said than done in our situation. Thanks for your help and encouragement. I know time will heal.

 

[connie1966]

i understand.. its sad though we have one life and everyone deserves to be happy , hang in there.. Try not to stress too much like i said its not worth it in the end just take care of you

 

[Bleanna]

Thank you. I am trying! I think this break up is just the "straw that broke the camels back".

 

[Am I mad 66]

Bleanna how I feel for you. Your description of how you feel takes me back to when my daughter and her husband split up in November. We do have the grandchildren so I suppose it is different from a boyfriend, but the thoughts and feelings are exactly the same - devastated, so sad. I only started to put it all not perspective when I found this page and realised others felt the same, as none of my friends or family seem to get it. That saying time heals is so true even though you won't think it just now.

Good luck, keep reading, it does get better. A little. Some days! Just remember on the bad days that the next might be a better one x

 

[Bleanna]

Thank you so much. I can't believe that I have turned to a "chicken" forum for comfort but as I was reading I realized I wasn't alone. I always had my act together, so to speak. It seems like it is all crumbling down now. I have never been super religious but I am trying to turn to God for help. I am praying a lot. I know that your daughter going through a divorce is much harder than just a break up. I hope each day is better for us both and we reach a time of happiness again.

 

[Am I mad 66]

I know, me too. But we do what helps. And like me you must have looked for others whose daughters had broken up with boyfriends to find this forum.

I do have one friend who I asked should I confront him with his behaviours and she advised no, to maintain our good relationship, but said write it down. That was really helpful too - took him off the pedestal I hade put him on.

Xx

 

[Bleanna]

Well, it is 2 am and I still can't sleep. I feel like a psycho. I have been "creeping" on social media trying to figure out what is going on. Am I mad 66 . . I have put this ex bf on a pedestal and I think that has added to my grief. I wanted my daughter to live happily ever after with him. Since I don't really know the details that caused the breakup , my mind is constantly wondering. My daughter won't talk about it to me. She got really angry with me because I wanted to know what happened, am I wrong to want to know? I know it must be so much harder when your child is going through a divorce. A 19 year old, who has only been in the relationship a year is very minor compared to a marriage breaking up. Still I am consumed by it and it is tearing me into pieces. I seem more upset than my daughter. Partly because I can't stand the thought of him wanting to be with someone more than my daughter. Also, because I felt he would keep her safe. Ugh!

 

[Am I mad 66]

Well, it is 2 am and I still can't sleep. I feel like a psycho. I have been "creeping" on social media trying to figure out what is going on. Am I mad 66 . . I have put this ex bf on a pedestal and I think that has added to my grief. I wanted my daughter to live happily ever after with him. Since I don't really know the details that caused the breakup , my mind is constantly wondering. My daughter won't talk about it to me. She got really angry with me because I wanted to know what happened, am I wrong to want to know? I know it must be so much harder when your child is going through a divorce. A 19 year old, who has only been in the relationship a year is very minor compared to a marriage breaking up. Still I am consumed by it and it is tearing me into pieces. I seem more upset than my daughter. Partly because I can't stand the thought of him wanting to be with someone more than my daughter. Also, because I felt he would keep her safe. Ugh!

I truly feel for you and you sound like I felt and why I'm called am I mad! BecAuse I was up in the night looking at fb and making myself feel even worse. Try hard not to, it makes things worse. It's now 8 days since I looked and it has def helped x