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There you go, explained way better than my bumbling attempt. This really is a life or death decision. This isn't McD's or Burger King. Even if he wasn't married, no kids involved, just himself this would be a huge decision. And given his negative thoughts up to this point, there's...
I missed the bit about your kiddos.
Band is available in many places, though not always that young... it's not a NEED, but a want...
But for your other one... there is NO guarantee at all that a similar class would be available, or that it'd be a snap to get her into it... wasn't the first...
My SIL and her hubby thought when he was in the forces that they'd have a base house too... nope. Nothing. They had to live in a rat hole for a LONG time, a very expensive rat hole. They lived on Ramen Noodles until he was done with that particular stint because after paying for housing, etc...