Adding an exciting element of danger to dog ownership:

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Mahonri, you described Molly(my basset) to a T!!! Plus I died laughing reading your post!
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I had a friend that had a new on like that and it would use it numerous times all week... then the next week he'd use the next one. I think I've heard them all now.
 
That is why I think cats are brilliant ! They politely descend to their spa room in the basement, politely take care of their own business, politely cover it up, and with characteristic dignity, rejoin polite company when they're finished.
 
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