First of all, I just want to give you a huge thumbs up for your view. Nothing bothers me more than someone telling me I am cruel to raise my own meat and then go out and buy chicken from the store.
I am sure there are more up to date ways, but I just do the same thing my grandparents did. We catch all of our roosters (mine are free range) and have them in the coop. I use a hatchet, and we have what we call our "slaughtering stump" - just a flat surface that can be cleaned and hit with the hatchet. DO NOT HESITATE! You want to hit it with enough force to take the head clean off the first time. Be aware that the chicken will flop around for a bit and sometimes it can be messy.
We slaughter about 8 or so at once then I simply skin them, I hate boiling them, and process the bird out. I use everything but the feathers and intestines because my dogs eat raw (an actual diet, not just raw meat). They eat what we don't - like the feet, organs, etc. It's easier when you just clean them and then you decide what you want for cooking later. Easiest is obviously the whole chicken for baking.
Good luck. I can't offer advise for your son, I was raised in it and it just was never a big deal.
