Advice on managing difficult people?

[EweSheep]

Quote:
Yep, exactly!

Bullies do not have a place in the workplace....hubby's co worker (ex Marine, a vet of Desert Storm, etc. and braggart and loudmouth) was a bully and he got terminated after three months probation was up. The company have no tolerance for bullies or someone who overrules the supervisor's orders "Do what I say, do when I say and do it NOW" tactic this guy was doing....he was gone!

 

[EweSheep]

Quote:
Exactly!

Hubby had a bullied co worker (an ex Marine, fought Iran/Ara. war, a rap sheet of domestic violence, DUIs) at work, and he was making everyone miserable...yelling at them in Marine style, "You DO what I say, you DO when I say and you DO it NOW!" type of thing. Not only that, he ended up carrying a makeshift knife he made at work, hubby reported to the supervisor. Supervisor gave him a warning about carrying weapons in the workplace and even him being an ex Marine does not allow him that special treatment. He beat the crap out of his sister with a ball bat, now that really took the icing off the cake when he made out threats....I do not know why the company tolerate him for three months probation (he was from a temp service and he has to carry out his 90 days probation or they will have to pay a fine or penatly for firing him...do the temp company have that right???????)

Well, bully worker was gone....supervisor could not take it anymore from the complaints from the employees. So that was done, and everyone worked in harmony.

 

[sianara]

The first problem sounds like you actually have no authority whatsovever and HE KNOWS THAT!

The second problem sounds like he is a chauvinist and feels no threat from you at all. If he is "in" with management through some family/friend relationship/connection as it sounds like he is then you are basically between a rock and a hard place.

For years I worked in these types of situations with such a feeling of dread and stress it affected my physical and mental health and I'm here to tell you now it's not worth it. Only YOU can make a change for yourself. It's not easy and it may take awhile but once you realize/accept management has put you in an untenable situation you need to get out of it. Start looking for another job (I know that's easier said than done especially in this economic environment) and into a more positive situation. Only YOU can do what's best for you, no one else is going to do it for you I'm very very sad to say. It may take awhile but I have found once I made plans and started working towards fulfilling those plans things got better for me "inside" and I was able to deal with the negativitiy better as I knew eventually I'd be out of it. You need a new plan now and you need to accept you have no control over this situation. It's a strong person that recognizes this wisdom and does something about it.

Remember this "If you always do what you always did - you'll always get/have what you always had". Not truer words were ever spoken IMHO.

Hope this advice doesn't come across as too harsh that was not my intention at all but it sounds like your situation needs drastic steps taken.

Good luck to you, I wish you the strength and wisdom to do what you have to do. I'm rooting for you!

eta: Twenty plus years ago I worked with a woman for 1.5 years who NEVER got the gist of what was involved in our job (it was complicated but NOT rocket science mind you

. I trained her and trained her but she just couldn't get it. I complained to my boss as professionally as I could, several times and my boss said to me "You can't fire someone for not doing her job." I was astounded. THAT is exactly why someone should be fired if they are unable to do their job! I mean what the heck??? So I finally decided I could not work in that environment anymore. I left and got another job etc. I found out later that that woman STAYED in that same job for SEVEN years after I had left. The only reason she was finally let go was because the company (a very BIG BIG computer company at the time) had gone through years of lay offs and eventually EVERYONE was let go as it took a slow 20 year decline in the computer industry. My point being, the squeaky wheel gets the grease. If I had stayed the situation would have stayed the same for 7 more years, it's as simple as that.

 

[Sonoran Silkies]

Ok, so you need someone who negotiates well (for the company) with clients. That is not necessarily the same as bullying them, but might well be better for the company. There are lots of folks who are good negotiators.

Do you have the authority to fire this employee? If not, then there is really not much you can do other than finding some other means of motivating him. Depending on the specific circumstances with your boss and him, you could have grounds for an EEOC complaint (discrimination because you are a woman).

 

[rufus]

Buy "The One Minute Manager." Read it and think about what has gone wrong with your relationship with this employee. He resents your domineering attitude and you resent his recalcitrant attitude. You are supposed to be a team, not adversaries.

The truth may be that your employer values his skills and service more than he does yours. Fix the relationship.

Rufus