American Baptists - I need your input/exprieinces please

[Yard full o' rocks]

I think the interim pastor (and all of us) should remember what Christ said when the disciples and others wanted to stone the prostitute

..."Let him who is without sin cast the first stone".

Kinda stings a bit, but makes ya think

 

[Miyashi]

I just have personal issues with the group here....
They stare me down all the time.
Tell me I'm going to Hell.
That I only have one chance to be saved.
I'm "trashy" because I wear pants. (I have a much easier time with work and farmwork in pants, thanks. Riding the horses is something I would never dream of doing in a skirt.)

There was a girl I worked with who's mother also worked with me.
Her mother was fine letting her marry this boy who she has never been alone with for any amount of time.
It just doesn't seem safe to me.
I wouldn't feel right letting my daughter marry someone who she never really got to know.
I would feel like a horrible mother.

A lot of the younger girls here aren't even from here, they left home to go to the school here that the church runs.
I was rather upset one day while talking to one of the girls.
She said that the church doesn't really accept her like her church back in Iowa did.
She said they don't like her participating in any of the group events and things like that...which I think is twisted. She pays to go to their college. She tries to participate and they treat her like an outsider...
so I'm feeling bad for her...then we get to talking about something else.
I asked her what she would do if she saw one of her co-workers stranded on the road, broken down car or something.
She said if it were a female, she would help, but if it were one of the males, she would leave him and not even stop.
She wouldn't want the church viewing her as someone who hangs out with boys without a chaperone.
The fact that she would just leave someone because of her own image being tarnished in a church that doesn't seem to give a crap about her made me sad.

Another girl I worked with was being molested by her stepfather. She like most others I've met who have been with this church their entire lives....she was very young in her mind. She was 24, but I swore she was 14 based on the way she talked and what not.
Anyway...her stepfather was molesting her and it got to the point that she had to do something about it. She went to talk to her pastor and do you know what he said?
"This is not my problem and I really don't have time for this."
He wouldn't even listen.
Who of you would turn someone with a problem, especially a problem like that, away?
At least point them in the right direction of who to talk to if you are unsure of your abilities!

I am not religious, I do believe you should follow the golden rule.
You should just be a good person.
I try to do that every day but I'm judged up and down and told everyday while I'm working or getting a gallon of milk that I'm going to Hell.

GAH! I'm sorry...I just wanted to share some of the experiences I've had since I've been living here.
I've really been trying to reach out to these girls....they are not confident, they act so small.....
None of us are small....

 

[calicokat]

I understand the the "idea" that the preacher is trying to make, he's wanting every member to have a good representation of the churches beliefs. Of which one belief is not living together before marriage. But I feel as though if he's goin to say that sin is not an acceptable act for church members then all others such as divorce, liars, gamblers, gossipers etc.. shouldn't be accepted as well.. but how are you goin to know if the members are up to par so to speak without watching them 24/7. Everyone is a sinner and some struggle with their sins more than others. I feel like him asking this, is just goin to stir up trouble and possibly divide up the church, and you'll have members leave.

I think he needs to not worry about the "reputation" of the church, and worry about the souls of his congregation. Preach the word and if the members are doing something thats wrong, the lord will speak through him to deliver the message they need to hear. Let them work out their convictions in their own time. In all honesty if someone doesn't feel convicted about their lifestyle their not goin to change it. Accept everyone with open arms, dont belittle them for their wrongs. Love them and show the way. In the end it doesn't matter what man says or thinks about someone its whats in their heart and soul that only god knows and only he can judge.

I hope for your sake that things work out, cause it seems you love your church and faith, and I'm sure its putting a damper on your spirit. The memebers need to pray and ask for the preacher to have guidance in his works. Dont never worry about what "MAN" says always put it in the lords hands and it'll work out..

You really got the problem in a nutshell. And there are just no clear cut answers because each answer brings its' own set of new questions.

The bolded part really is how the pastor feels, and that's why he wants to baptize these folks and pastor to them with the deacons, it's just the paragraph above that, about having them be a good representative that makes membership a question.

And if people farted purple smoke when they lied or belched big blue bubbles when they had been veiwing porn online the night before, that would make picking out some other sins a whole lot easier too. It's just the living together and making babies makes this one obvious.​

 

[calicokat]

Quote:
Well, he was the interim pastor for about 6 months, then the church "Called" him to be our pastor by taking a vote on whether to hire him or not. Once he was hired, he began working with the deacons on the membership "procedures" (for lack of a better word). Reviewing what our church's constitution says, and coming up with this proposed change.

We are at the stage now of researching how other AB churches handle membership, and praying about the direction to take. We'll meet again in the new year to discuss it, and maybe vote on accepting this change or not.

 

[Miyashi]

Also, if I've said anything to offend anyone, before getting angry with me, just ask me about it.
Chances are I really wasn't trying to be offensive at all.

 

[pamperedpoultry]

Quote:
You really got the problem in a nutshell. And there are just no clear cut answers because each answer brings its' own set of new questions.

The bolded part really is how the pastor feels, and that's why he wants to baptize these folks and pastor to them with the deacons, it's just the paragraph above that, about having them be a good representative that makes membership a question.

And if people farted purple smoke when they lied or belched big blue bubbles when they had been veiwing porn online the night before, that would make picking out some other sins a whole lot easier too. It's just the living together and making babies makes this one obvious.

I cracked up on the farting purple smoke.. LOL!!!!!

I know what you mean.. I know in his mind he's thinking he's setting an example.. and also in his mind he feels its wrong and feels like, those individuals are obvious "living in sin" if you will, and if the church lets them become members that they are condoning that type of life style.. I can see his point of view.. however with putting that rule into place he's also goin to make them feel belittled and that everyone in the church is "Looking down on them" and their not goin to feel too welcome.. I think the only way to go on this is leave it alone. Don't push them away, pull them in and give them guidance...Church is supposed to be like "Family" Not everyones children represents their family like they should, do we push them away and say NO you can't be members of our family anymore.. No we try to accept them and guide them in the right direction.

 

[calicokat]

Oh Miyashi, the experiences of your friends just make me sad because they make all religions look bad. I hope that the friend being molested was able to find someone who could counsel her and be compassionate.

to you for being their friend!

 

[calicokat]

Yard full o' rocks :

I think the interim pastor (and all of us) should remember what Christ said when the disciples and others wanted to stone the prostitute

..."Let him who is without sin cast the first stone".

Kinda stings a bit, but makes ya think

Someone earlier mentioned this, but added that Jesus then told her to "go and sin no more" -- and that's the problem here. The folks who are living together have no intentions of changing the situation, they plan to continue "living in sin". (And when I say living in sin, it's the baby making activities of non-married folks that I'm referring to really, not the technical living arrangement, you know?

- trying to keep it family friendly and all!)​

 

[SourRoses]

I can only tell you what our non-denominational Christian church does.

Doors are open.

If they weren't open to all, how could they help those who are really in need of Gods LOVE? They couldn't.

Sin versus non-sin (and we know what else God says, ONLY JESUS CHRIST was without sin), everyone is greeted with the same open arms God greets us with. If someone has personal issues, those are between that person and God. If they are looking for help and advice, there are a bunch of open ears willing to help.

Un-married, pregnat, straight, gay, addicted, convicts, confused, proud, burdened, every last one is a precious lost jewel in the eyes of God. He loves them. So should we. The Bible states that sin is sin, there is no lesser or greater sin. No ranking from 1 - 10. Pride in ones supposed lack of sin is just as much sin as someones personal life, or a violent crime. Jesus came for everybody who wants him. No membership dues required.

God is all light and in Him is no darkness at all.

 

[Miyashi]

Quote:
Said friend started dating a guy from out of town (dated for a month) decided she would move away with him....
Now she's texting all of her ex coworkers about how bad it was to do that.
She had nowhere else to go though.
Her family kicked her out basically and the church shut their doors.
My boss told her that she's gonna have to deal with it for at least a week...I guess this guy has been yelling at her and just been downright mean in the emotional trauma sort of way.
My boss said that if he hits her, we'll be right there....but she made this choice and left work...she has to plug it out.
I understand where my boss is coming from and I understand running away and being scared...
This poor girl has no real life experiences other than the molesting...
she's not very strong...
it makes me sad to see so many people who don't believe in themselves.
Not everyone at said church is bad.....the majority are cruel.
I've met a small amount who are kind....but they weren't raised in that church...they moved here for one reason or another and this was the baptist church in the area so that's where they went.
I'm not trying to be rude when I say this....but the way this church operates is very cult like...
the joke is not to drink the water out here...
Hope that didn't offend anyone!