Chicken journal entries

[fowltemptress]

Googlibutt

I know the egg thieves are up to something weird. It's bad enough that they take my eggs every day, but now they're acting stranger than usual. They brought out this thing . . . it looked like a lizard, but lizards are food, and this was too big to be food. They brought it out and kept setting Missy next to it, and made clicky noises at them with a shiny black thing. I'm surprised Missy didn't try to eat the lizard thing. I would have, just in case I was wrong about it being too big to eat. You have to be careful with live food, though, because sometimes what you can eat gets big enough to eat you. In that case, I'm surprised Missy didn't get eaten.
Wait, no, I'm not surprised. I think I've just figured out what those horrible egg thieves are trying to do. They're trying to replace Little Guy with that thing! Soon our eggs will be tainted with weird big non-food lizard blood, and our chicks will be have four legs, or frills, or no feathers, or some other unnatural thing. Well, I'm not standing for that! I'm going to hatch every egg we've got now, before that thing gets a chance to replace Little Guy. I'll have to be sure to keep all the other chickens out of the nest boxes, no telling if they've already been tainted. The egg thieves are going to be mad at me. I know the female is always huffy when I try to brood, but this time I won't let her thieving hands slip under me to grab any of my eggs, I'll give her such a peck! The egg thieves will learn to rue the day they ever thought to mess with a silkie!
I do wish I knew what that clicky thing was for* . . .





*Googlibutt may not know, but I do. Missy and the big non-food lizard thing can be seen here (along with more fantastic photos by other BYCers), thanks to my shiny black clicky thing and an SO who knows how to use it.

---> https://www.backyardchickens.com/forum/viewtopic.php?id=234209&p=2

 

[fowltemptress]

M

I did it! I'm a mother again! Googlibutt keeps making noises, trying to attract my chicks over to her nest. She needs to mind her own business and hatch her own eggs. I know she wants to hatch an army of chicks to overthrow the tall ones, but I won't let my babies be used in such a way. Besides, the tall ones bring treats for my chicks. I know they'll take them in a few days . . . they always do . . . but I know they do it to protect them. I couldn't keep my first chick safe from the big hawk, so I'm happy to let the tall ones protect them for me.
The chicks are such sweet things. I know Googlibutt just seethes with jealousy in her nest. She keeps talking about how my beauties are probably tainted . . . my, how insanity runs rampant in this flock! Not one normal chicken, save Persephone and Penelope, but what good is being sane to them? No one takes a feather footed chicken seriously. How grateful I am for the good sense of our rooster for keeping a handsome pair of clean legs! Of course, he and I are of a superior breed, after all. He perched nearby earlier, watching as the chicks ventured out from underneath me. It's weird how little interest he shows in my chicks, but maybe that's because they're showing a bit of fluff on their legs. I'm sure that will fall off soon, but such strange coloring! But then, when I look behind me I notice my tail is the same coloring as my chicks. They must get it from that.
I think tomorrow I might venture out, show them the food and water. They are such dear things!

 

[fowltemptress]

Persephone

M has done it again, hatching my chicks. I wonder if she'll notice? Heehee, sweet thing, I won't tell!
I'm not jealous, no, not at all. I finally got that scamp Yuri to quit following me so, and I won't be quick to begin again! There's something off about Yuri, anyway. I know she's mine, I hatched her, but when she's standing close to Vladimir I get the funniest feeling, like I'm missing something obvious. Oh, bother it all! I'll hash it out with Penelope, and she'll set my mind at rest, the silly glutton. I'd love her more if she'd just stay away from my morsels!
Seeing those chicks has made me realized I haven't laid an egg in a while, but I don't feel bad. It must be that the water that keeps falling from the sky has me all upset. I heard that silly thing Missy calling it rain. Sometimes I want to peck her, just to knock some sense into her. As a member of the most superior breed of chickens out there, she should show more sense! Ooh! I make myself mad just thinking about it!
I wonder, though, how the water gets up there? Everyone knows water lives in containers, so that animals can get to it easily. I've tried, and I know I can't get to the sky easily at all, so what's the point? The hawks and little yippy birdies, maybe they drink from the containers in the sky? But they must not be very good containers, since they leak all the time . . . and anyway, why should the hawks and yippy birdies have so much water up there to begin with? They must be very thirsty. I'm glad to be a chicken!
All this leaky water keeps my leg feathers frazzled! Hmmph! I'm almost, mind you, not quite, but almost jealous of M, Tini, and Little Guy, with their silly naked legs! When the big light in the sky comes back I know I'll come to my senses, though. Naked legs, indeed!
Oh! I hear the chicks peeping. Strange how much I want to peck them now, I'm almost certain I never wanted to hurt my own. Or did I? No, I don't think so. I'm looking at Yuri right now, and I don't feel like pecking her, so I must not want to hurt the chicks I've hatched. Wonder why? Maybe I should hatch some more and see if I want to peck them, but not now. No, no, not now. There are far too many grasshoppers to catch to be bothered with that now, and I always want to peck at grasshoppers!