Fallen deep into a funk....possible cervical cancer....UPDATE

[gabrielle1976]

Well let out a scream and let it out , then move on , Its hard I know from personal experance but you gain nothing from sitting around thinking how much is starting to build up around you . I have lapses where I get overwhelmed as a single mom and as a person that has many physical problems but although I sometimes let my self wollow for a few I found I need to let it go to , nothing can change how crappy things are going right now but this is just a moment in time it will pass as everything does , we all have so very very very many things to be hopefull and thank full for . Maybe you should make a list of things that are going right or that you enjoy. exp

I am free
God is good
My children are healthy
The sun is shineing
There is food for us to eat / we are not starveing
I live in a country where speach and ideas are free


ect ect ect .. we all have so much going for us though its hard to see that thru our troubles. Please get out and walk and get into the light it will make you feel better . Socializeing will probly help a ton to. Its easy to be dark and gloomy in youre room in the dark compared to out walking in the sunshine or haveing a chat with someone.

God loves you and you are never alone

 

[debilorrah]

I agree with seeing a doc - it sounds like post partum depression to me. I know the things with David are magnified right now too.

 

[crzychickenlady]

The problem with going to a new doctor is, with state insurance, you have to sign a consent with the facility for the tubal 30 days prior to having it done. So I'm out of time to have it done. It just makes me furious that no one notified me, I would have pushed to have it done sooner.

I'm mad as all get out so I'm actually up and out of bed and gonna make some phone calls..


Thanks everyone for listening..err..reading.

I'm thankful to have all my fellow chicken friends, it does make me feel a little better that there are people that care!

 

[beefy]

amber i've noticed for a while you seemed to be suffering from PPD. seeing a doctor sounds like the best option, even if you cant afford to. can you afford not to? maybe they can get your wimmenshormones under control.

i always think about that commercial that shows the really sad looking dog and says "depression hurts everyone." you have to do something about it, b/c it does affect your kids. Tell David to quit being a tool and help you out. and if he actually will, swallow your pride and let him help you. y'all are in this together now.

know that the overwhelming feelings ARE the depression talking. yes, things may be snowballing but you can only do so much and even tho it seems like you may not be making any progress you are. so dont dwell on what you cant do and dont have but what you can do and do have.

you really just need to get out of your head. get some sun, some fresh air, and if possible go for a walk or run. working out really does help. adrenalin is the bomb. dont allow yourself to "mope", you have too much to do. like joerodge said, cut out the sugar and drink more water. little things like that can make a drastic difference. a semi-cleanse if you will.

lastly, if i can help in anyway (and you will let me) let me know.



ps. good to hear from joerodge, i was just asking about you last night. i could tell you were down in the dumps too.

 

[sfw2]

Doesn't UMKC have a med school? I know VCU/MCV's hospital is state owned and can't turn ANYONE away, regardless of insurance status. I agree with the other posters - If you can find a way to deal with the depression, a lot of other things will fall into perspective, and maybe seem a bit more manageable. You HAVE to take care of yourself, in order to be able to care for your kids.

God bless . . .

 

[crzychickenlady]

I just posted an ad to sell my '58 Fairlane *cries*

If I can manage to sell that I can get caught up on some bills....it breaks my heart to let her go....

 

[Indiana hens]

Sounds logical! But, R U kidding me! That car is wonderful!

 

[astylishgirl]

Please let us know if you have gone to the doc for ppd. The sooner you get on meds the better... they don't work right away. I had PPD and it really feels bad.

Is this your first child? Nothing is more exciting or overwhelming.

As for the material things? You might miss your car... but you will feel so good paying some bills. On the other hand, if the car means too much to you, find something else to sell.

 

[trishok8]

Amber,
Let me first say that I commend you on being brave enough to admit that you are depressed. A lot of people would not willingly admit that for various reasons.

You have taken the first step to getting being better.

When your mentally stronger you can make better decisions about your relationship. Try to be strong for your children, they need you.

Please take the advice of the great people here and get on some meds to help with the PPD.

Don't worry about the tubes being tied, be SMART about things and try you best to deal with your health first.

Please hang in there and know that everyday things will get better.

Your chickens love and miss you--so spend some time with them!!

Please get well, we are all thinking of you and your children.

Trish

 

[gudrin]

Honey, I've been where you are with the money woes and the depression. It's tough. One thing that helped me was talking with my friends, as you are doing here. Also, my doctor was very helpful with getting me figured out with some meds. Remember though, the first type they give you may or may not work. It's a crapshoot. I have depression that wasn't diagnosed until my post-partum depression just would not go away. My psychiatrist figures I've been dealing with this crap for a long time (since a teenager!) and I just never realized it till now.

There's a book that may help. You can probably get it at the library. It's called "Get It Done When You're Depressed." I'll post a link to the amazon page so you can take a look. I heard about it on a radio show, and had to see what it was about for myself. It has helped me a lot.

book link