French frogs

[scflock]

I won't comment on all of it, but this one item needs a response.


Now, my way is to think through the bad that can happen (like where is the nearest hospital if someone crashes one of the dirt bikes into a tree, or if we break it, how far and in which direction will we need to go to recover it) and then go out and have fun anyhow.  Risks are considered in order of likelihood of negative effects...only rarely will they impact activities, like if DH wants to cut a tree leaning over the camper without using ropes, pulleys and the truck to pull it back in a safe direction.  I am a constructive "worrier", I just want to keep my life at peace by eliminating things that would take away from my leisure by making more work for me.  So I guess I am just as much narcissist as you.

I did the same thing. The things I eliminated were family, and it worked very well
Gotta love these reflective holidays

 

[Sally Sunshine]

Ok, I'm about to get very busy at work, so I don't have time to wait for permission

You may reply while I'm typing this, but too late

Most people will say "Awe hon", or be supportive because they don't want to say anything that offends. Luckily I don't have that gene

You start your morning by saying "I'm depressed".

Narcissist rule number 1: Be happy. Even if it inconveniences others, you owe it to yourself and your husband to be happy. If you are already depressed because of something you volunteered to do, don't volunteer. Now you are dreading it, your husband has a depressed wife, and you will resent the parents of the kids because you are going to have a very stressful day.
Rule #2: Get over the silly stuff that doesn't last. It's one day. You have already convinced yourself of "how my day is going to play out". You're setting yourself up for failure. You volunteered, it's done, don't make it any harder on yourself than it already is by being in a depressed mood before it even starts. Believe me, I know about Thanksgiving depression... It will be over soon. No need in getting yourself all worked up over something that is fleeting. People suck, the Holidays suck, and that's just how it is. Take my motto to heart: Flock 'em

And while I'm at it, let me go ahead and alienate half of the thread:
" see how women just have to think ahead and already create issues that are not there yet? but they will be there because we always KNOW these things?"

Exactly, and you all realize it, but you still do it. Dreading something that hasn't even happened yet. I'm speaking as a husband here, it drives me insane. It's life, stuff happens, and a lot of it sucks, but it passes. Why build some small event into this huge thing that ruins your day, I'm guessing ruins your husbands day, and you will be mad at yourself tomorrow for being this way? Don't think ahead, take it as it comes. It may not be that bad. I will say that is a big difference between men and women, at least in my case. Women like to prepare for the worst so they can be pleasantly surprised if it doesn't turn out so bad. Men would rather be happy, not needlessly dread something that may not be so bad, then just complain and raise hell about it for a few hours if it does turn out bad. Then it's over.
I'm not saying one is right or wrong. Women are too emotional, men aren't emotional enough. There has to be a happy medium in there somewhere, but the extremes either direction are unhealthy for both of us, and cause problems where there shouldn't be problems.
Try looking at it a different way. You are getting to whelp, and the grandkids are coming over. What a glorious day

If it all heads south and starts falling apart, take a blue one, take a pink one, wash it down with a martini, and flock 'em

OK, off to work

yeeezusssss ma puce! I don't understand how you get so emotionally involved in offering such narcissist guidance to such a manic depressant in such a fake wold

Take NOTE: I dont have grand kids, I am not a fan of holidays w/ many people I like it intimate, you have very good points, notes taken.


and since your bartender, you should by now that I only drink JD&C and no other fancy crap unless I have no choice or to be polite.

 

[Sally Sunshine]

sorry in the middle of things or I would have typed you a letter

 

[scflock]

yeeezusssss ma puce! I don't understand how you get so emotionally involved in offering such narcissist guidance to such a manic depressant in such a fake wold    

Take NOTE: I dont have grand kids, I am not a fan of holidays w/ many people I like it intimate, you have very good points, notes taken.


and since your bartender, you should by now that I only drink JD&C  and no other fancy crap unless I have no choice or to be polite. 

Touché

 

[LittleLakePhil]

Ain't nothing fancy about a vodka milkshake....it's actually kinda white trashy.....and I'm kinda red necky but I still want on of those cement pond thingys

 

[Cockatrice6420]

My holidays are always fly by the seat of our pants style the last few years. Between finances, in laws, vehicle problems, and illness we have just taken it all in stride. I know that some members of the family get pi$$y about it but they're slowly learning that it ain't doing them any good. I've had to be the bad guy doing the preventative worrying and have had to show people what flock u is all about. I hate going momma bear on folks, but they gotta see that I'm right! (I guess I'm a little daffodil like myself)

 

[LittleLakePhil]

Me and my wife are just going down to the American Legion for Thanksgiving as
Kids live too far away to drive for dinner....and the one that still lives close has to work...So a bunch of us are doing a dinner there this year.

 

[kwhites634]

Ain't nothing fancy about a vodka milkshake....it's actually kinda white trashy.....and I'm kinda red necky but I still want on of those cement pond thingys

Personally, I'd prefer one of those big tables with all the pot passers

 

[napdognewfie]

Ok, I'm about to get very busy at work, so I don't have time to wait for permission
You may reply while I'm typing this, but too late
Most people will say "Awe hon", or be supportive because they don't want to say anything that offends. Luckily I don't have that gene

You start your morning by saying "I'm depressed".
Narcissist rule number 1: Be happy. Even if it inconveniences others, you owe it to yourself and your husband to be happy. If you are already depressed because of something you volunteered to do, don't volunteer. Now you are dreading it, your husband has a depressed wife, and you will resent the parents of the kids because you are going to have a very stressful day.
Rule #2: Get over the silly stuff that doesn't last. It's one day. You have already convinced yourself of "how my day is going to play out". You're setting yourself up for failure. You volunteered, it's done, don't make it any harder on yourself than it already is by being in a depressed mood before it even starts. Believe me, I know about Thanksgiving depression... It will be over soon. No need in getting yourself all worked up over something that is fleeting. People suck, the Holidays suck, and that's just how it is. Take my motto to heart: Flock 'em

And while I'm at it, let me go ahead and alienate half of the thread:
"  [COLOR=FF0000]see how women just have to think ahead and already create issues that are not there yet? but they will be there because we always KNOW these things?[/COLOR]"

Exactly, and you all realize it, but you still do it. Dreading something that hasn't even happened yet. I'm speaking as a husband here, it drives me insane. It's life, stuff happens, and a lot of it sucks, but it passes. Why build some small event into this huge thing that ruins your day, I'm guessing ruins your husbands day, and you will be mad at yourself tomorrow for being this way? Don't think ahead, take it as it comes. It may not be that bad. I will say that is a big difference between men and women, at least in my case. Women like to prepare for the worst so they can be pleasantly surprised if it doesn't turn out so bad. Men would rather be happy, not needlessly dread something that may not be so bad, then just complain and raise hell about it for a few hours if it does turn out bad. Then it's over.
I'm not saying one is right or wrong. Women are too emotional, men aren't emotional enough. There has to be a happy medium in there somewhere, but the extremes either direction are unhealthy for both of us, and cause problems where there shouldn't be problems.
Try looking at it a different way. You are getting to whelp, and the grandkids are coming over. What a glorious day e
If it all heads south and starts falling apart, take a blue one, take a pink one, wash it down with a martini, and flock 'em
OK, off to work

I wish I could. Unfortunately, I have been cursed with a conscience.

I also had a great grandmother known for being a big witch with a b. I'd really rather not be remembered that way. Lol

 

[FridayYet]

I won't comment on all of it, but this one item needs a response.


Now, my way is to think through the bad that can happen (like where is the nearest hospital if someone crashes one of the dirt bikes into a tree, or if we break it, how far and in which direction will we need to go to recover it) and then go out and have fun anyhow.  Risks are considered in order of likelihood of negative effects...only rarely will they impact activities, like if DH wants to cut a tree leaning over the camper without using ropes, pulleys and the truck to pull it back in a safe direction.  I am a constructive "worrier", I just want to keep my life at peace by eliminating things that would take away from my leisure by making more work for me.  So I guess I am just as much narcissist as you.

Thanks for writing that so nicely, I'm the same way.

I also know my limits and have no problem saying "no" when needed, especially when you need to schedule extra space for those unforeseen circumstances.