Funniest Things A City Slicker Has Ever Said To You?

[itsachicken]

Honestly, I just logged in to BYC over lunch to "check in" but this thread totally sucked me in. One more post and then I SWEAR I'm going to go finish the housework.

My cousin's son (about 4 yrs old) went out to help my mother milk the goats. He was absolutely fascinated. As he was drinking that milk at dinner his mother asked how he liked it. "Fine", he said. Mom, who was a little "weirded" out by the whole fresh milk thing pointed out that he had just seen Aunt Judy get that milk out of a goat. He looked at her, with some confusion, and said, "All I saw was a goat peein' in a bucket." He also thinks eggs just occur, the chickens sit on them so he knows where to find them.

 

[Max Bantam]

we was workin cows one day and had a few in the chute, we was checking teeth, worming and such. my buddy was datin this ol gal from "the big city" . we had an older cow that was real poor lookin, she had her head up and you could see her teeth without opening her mouth, that ol gal started screamin an hollerin " i know why she is so skinny, she aint got no top teeth!" i laughed till i cried. i had to tell her " darlin aint no cow got top teeth"..... i can still se the excitement on her face when she figured out why that momma was so skinny

 

[pbjmaker]

Call me cow stupid (or is it stoopid now) but they really don't have top teeth? I am so cornfused...

 

[Ladybirds9]

Wait, they can actually send chicks in the mail?
At lunch one day, I'm eating a brown boiled egg. One of my friends says "did that come from your chickens?"
no, my cat lays eggs.
I'm really looking forward to when my ameracaunas start laying so I can hear "why do you have an easter egg in october?"
"You can get eggs without a rooster? how?"
Another day, a different friend looks at the brown egg and says, "but those come from brown cows!"
Me: along with chocolate milk.

 

[Tam'ra of Rainbow Vortex]

I have had people gasp in horror when I tell them I have a rooster and sell and eat the eggs. -'Doesn't that mean there are baby chicks inside?'

And I once enlightened a very sweet boy on the methods of bee-keeping. He was a city vegan I met walking my (overly friendly) dog. He was quite polite and aware he knew nothing about how we got honey, except that it comes from bees, which he knew were animals, making it against the vegan code to consume. When I told him I had, and would again, keep bees, he happily asked me to tell him all about it. Apparently there is controversy about using honey and beeswax while claiming to be vegan. I told him very few bees are harmed in the proccess if you are doing it right and they are actually better off in hives than in the wild because humans protect them and only harvest their surplus. The boy listened, rapt, asking only for a few clarifications. He then thanked me, told me he had made up his mind that bee products WERE in keeping with his beliefs, and the next time he heard other vegans debating the topic, he would advocate that bees are treated humanely and honey should be ok.

Not knowing something doesn't make you stupid, its how you handle it that gives people that impression.

 

[ILOVEFRIZZLES]

your ad say straight run does that mean I a have a 50% chance of getting a boy.

 

[Karrie13]

Quote:
Not in the front, but they do have molars in the back!

Neither do deer!

 

[Ladybirds9]

Quote:
There are a few horses that live down the street from us. When my cousins came to visit in the fall we picked apples from the trees across the road and took them to the horses. When my cousin came back in early March she suggested that we go feed the horses. I told her that we couldn't because we didn't have any apples. "Why don't we pick them from the trees like we did last time?"

 

[Whitehouse Quail]

Quote:
Not in the front, but they do have molars in the back!

Neither do deer!

And sheep. My sheep gum me all they want, but once my finger goes in their mouth farther than two inches, i quickly retract so I don't get my finger broken off!

 

[MomMommyMamma]

Quote:
Eggplants, of course!

http://z.about.com/d/gardening/1/7/k/P/Eggplant_EasterEggPlant_ParkSeed.jpg

Still working my way through this thread but that one was just too cute!