Funny things happen at work when you least expect them...

[orumpoultry]

Okay, so really random things happen at work ALL the time. But here is one of my favorites.

Customer is staring down a bag of layer REALLY hard, and glancing over to the scratch, then back at the layer pellets. Being the only poultry keeper on staff, I gradually move her way to find out if she needs help. Before I can even ask, she looks up at me rather desperately and goes "My husband sent me for chicken food... but there's so many!"
Me: "Do you know if it's a pellet, crumble, or grain? What is the color of the bag?"
Customer: Blank stare.
Me: "It really matters, most people feed their layers a 16%-"
Customer: "Layers... like, ones that lay eggs?"
Me: "Uhm, well, generally... Yes. If it crows, it's a rooster. If it lays an egg, it's a hen... Hens can be called layers from time to time."
Customer: "Well, I eat eggs. Hold on a second." - She calls her husband, and I move off to help another customer. Several minutes later she approaches me and asks "Which one is the yellow and tan bag?"
Note: We have at least SEVEN yellow and tan bags of poultry feed. I casually direct her to them and finish helping the second customer. Several more minutes pass and she approaches me again, with her husband on the phone. She hands me the phone, and shrugs her shoulders.
Customers husband through the phone: "-name brand- layer pellet, 16% pellet. Yellow and tan bag, 50 pounds. Exactly what I told her a few minutes ago."

I could barely contain myself as I loaded up her feed for her. It's almost as good as "Wait, they need food AND water?"

There's SO many, but this one just popped in my head and felt I should share. I don't believe the husband could be any clearer. ALSO, after I had her loaded, I noticed she was clutching a piece of paper with all the information carefully written down for her on it.

 

[mikki717]

That is a good one.

My favorite happened a few months ago. I work at Easter Seals. Our campus is part adult center, Adult therapy pool, and pediatric Therapy offices. I work in Admin. So an elderly woman calls and asks,

her: "Are you missing a turtle?"
me "This is Easter Seals."
her: "I know, I live a block over from you, and I just found a turtle. I thought it might belong to Easter Seals."
me: "I don't think we have any turtles here..."
her: "But you do have the pool, and I don't want it to get hurt."
me: "...ummm is it a land tortise or a water turtle?"
her: "It is out in front of my house. I found it crossing the road."

It took everything in my being to NOT answer: "Was it stapled to a chicken?"

 

[orumpoultry]

Today I had a woman come in to check the chicks. I forget what we got in exactly, but she was going through the specialty bins and BLOWING into the butts of the chicks. Said it was a way of sexing them, as hens would move but roosters wouldn't? Almost as good as the one I saw the other day of someone had a customer SNIFFING the chicks. We poultry people are weird birds.

 

[airen]

Not birds, but I once helped a lady staring intently as some kitties we had for adoption. Little bitties... adorable, but abandoned.

She said she wanted one, so before we got to that, I helped her pack her cart with things she would need... we get to the litter.

"What's this for?"

..."The litter box." I assumed that would explain it.

"What's that?" Maybe not.

"IT's where the cat goes to the bathroom."

"EW! I don't want to deal with that! Do you have anything that doesn't poop?"

"... ...no?"

"Can I just not feed it?"

Mentally, I had already decided this lady wasn't getting a kitty... but that sealed it.

"No, it will die."

"How long?"

"... ((stink eye))..."

I so wish I was kidding. And it wasn't a young person, either...

 

[gryeyes]

Late in the morning of the Northridge Earthquake (January 17, 1994), I answered a phone call from a woman inquiring if Disneyland was open. (I worked for the California Highway Patrol in Los Angeles County, in the 9-1-1 Center. At least she had the sense to call the non-emergency line!)

"I don't know ma'am - that's in Orange County and the Earthquake was in Los Angeles County, but we are advising everyone to stay off the highways if at all possible."

"Well, I have the day off and I'm going to Disneyland! What's the best way to get there from [her neighborhood]?"

"I'd call Disneyland first - I'm sure you can find the number in your phone directory - you might have to wait awhile if you call 4-1-1......"

She interrupted me: "I already tried that - it's either busy or rings and rings. What's the quickest way there? I don't want to get stuck in traffic."

"As I said, we are recommending folks stay home and off the streets. I really don't have time to fill out a TripTik for you like AAA."

"It's a holiday - AAA is closed."

"Excuse me, ma'am, I have other calls to answer. Just so you know, most gas stations are not able to pump gas because they're out of power. Do you have a full tank?"

"I don't appreciate your patronizing me like this. Thanks for nothing!" click

All I could think of during the whole conversation was, "Wasn't THAT an E-Ticket enough of a ride for you????!?!?!?" (Referring to the earthquake and all the aftershocks.)

Some people.

 

[orumpoultry]

No, no no... Someone misled you. Kittens don't need food OR water. They make it themselves with a process called photosynthesis. They don't use the bathroom, they just re pollinate using bugs! - EVERYTHING goes to the bathroom! That's hysterical.