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Help, My Sun Conure HATES ME!!!

Discussion in 'Caged Birds - Finches, Canaries, Cockatiels, Parro' started by kelseygirl707, Apr 13, 2009.

  1. kelseygirl707

    kelseygirl707 Dances with Chickens

    Mar 3, 2009
    Lakeport, Ca.
    So My husband and I bought a Sun Conure yesterday, and she Abolutley Loves My husband, but she HATES me, the only time she is nice to me is when my husband isn't around, and even then I have a 50 50 chance of getting bit. She rides on his sholder, takes treats from him, kisses him, talks for him, and only shows aggression towards me. We Bought her from a woman, so I'm not sure that it's a female thing, I was really excited about getting her, but now, I'm sooo scared of her. Has anybody else had this problem, and if so how did you fix it?

    Here's Karmen


    And here's JoJo, we just got him (I'm thinking her) last week and she/He is a people whore, will go to anybody with an extended finger, LOL. JoJo is going through his/Her first Molt, so we should now in a month or two if JoJo is a he or she, depending of if it's feathers grow back gray (Male) or stay mostly yellow with gray (Female)


    JoJo after first Shower.... [​IMG]



  2. momoftwinsinwi

    momoftwinsinwi Songster

    May 29, 2007
    Rochester, WI
    you'll know if Jojo is a her if she starts laying eggs for you...if not, she....is a boy.....LOL, I have a male cockatiel, he's pretty friendly...the kids play with him, after of course, he gets tired of flying around the house...ha ha!!
  3. kelseygirl707

    kelseygirl707 Dances with Chickens

    Mar 3, 2009
    Lakeport, Ca.
    So today I dropped my husband off at school, then came home and went to get Karmen out of her cage, and she came to me, sat on my shoulder and did my errands with me all afternoon, she even gave me a kiss [​IMG] , then we went to pick up my husband and she didn't want to leave me to go to him, but eventually did(Never acted aggressive towards DH, just wouldn't step up onto his finger) So I thought, maybe we had become friends I was sooo excited!!!.... I was wrong, once with him she let me pet her once then would bite at me every time I came close, She finaly cought me and bit me so hard that she cracked my fingernail, so I figured she was a one person bird, she would only let the person holding her pet her, but then some guy at the super market pet her with no issues.... I was so Peeved!!! [​IMG] So what is it, does she only like men, but will settle for me if none are around, that aint gonna work for me.... My Husband wants to sell her, he says that if we are going to have a pet for the next 30 years, it better get along with both of us, and hopefully our families, What do I do, we have both wanted this type of bird for a very long time..... [​IMG]
  4. morelcabin

    morelcabin Songster

    Feb 8, 2007
    Ontario Canada
    We had a quaker that was like that, a one person bird..I still have scars from him!
  5. NancyDz

    NancyDz Songster

    Oct 9, 2008
    Dutch Flat, CA
    I think you should give it some time before you get rid of her. She's dealing with a new environment, new people, new experiences. It sounds to me like she's confused and stressed. For one I wouldnt be taking her places yet or introducing her to new people. Let her get used to her new environment for a while first and that there will be two caretakers in her life. It's pretty common for a bird to bond more with one person in the household but they should be okay with others in the household. I think all the passing between people is stressful. I would limit that for awhile, put her back in her cage before passing her to someone else. Also DO NOT SHOW FEAR. My boyfriend's bird will always take advantage of someone who shows any kind of fear around him. This does not mean being agressive. Your bird will take some time to be comfortable and for you to get used to what does and doesnt bother it. Right now it is on sensory overload with new environment. Develop a routine so the bird knows what to expect and to bond with both of you. It takes time.. Also it's a big no no to let a bird ride on your shoulder... you think that beak hurts your finger.. imagine what it can do to your eye.
    Last edited: Apr 13, 2009
  6. You can send her to me if you dont want her... I love conures.
  7. Beed

    Beed Songster

    Dec 11, 2008
    Ft. Pierce, Florida
    Congrats! Sunny's are sooo cute. But, you guys have a loud bird on your hands. Sunny's are known to be very, very vocal. Please don't sell her.I agree w/ post about giving Carmen time. Parrots are very much like 2-3 year old babies and need comfort and love. Re-homing her would make her heartsick and worse for wear. She needs to get to know you guys. My sister has a sun conure named Tootie and he is a two person bird. Loves my sister and me. Carmen will like you she just needs time. I am a total parrot person. I love all of them. One thing that helps is always talking in a sweet low voice. Never yell or hit (even the cage)-I know you wouldn't. I just say that to everybody. Sunny's are biters. If you can take it, push into the bite. Don't pull away quickly. She will eventually stop because she will find out it does no good. I could go on and on. Oh, give her a sleepy hut or newspapers in bottom of cage to hide in and make sure she gets 10 to 12 hours of down time-sleep. One more thing-give her apples and she will love you forever. Good luck!

  8. Empera

    Empera Songster

    Jan 27, 2009
    Issaquah, WA
    Sun Conures are beautiful birds but goodness they are loud and emotional birds.

    My mother who has always loved parrots and birds in general was waiting until most of our cats had pasted away to even consider getting Sweety (such an original name..) That was about 4 1/2 years ago. We went to Petco being newbie bird buyers and just picked her up. She was a baby maybe 6 months old I believe and very quiet. It took a few weeks until we were able to not scare her and have her come out of her cage. She bonded immediately to my father and mother. Mostly to my father but when he isn't around, my mother.

    When they are gone for more than a day, Sweety will be very attached with us but never when they are around. She screams and screams all day, so beware about the noise. Afternoon naps during those fits will be close to impossible. [​IMG]

    I just got an African Grey about 4 months ago that is now almost 7 months, and he is definantly not as tempermental. He doesn't go to anyone else besides myself and my boyfriend because we are the only ones who really are around him much. My parents don't make the effort so Zeus gets rather scared by them.

    All in all: She may just bond to your husband mainly but learn to love you too with time and patience. Good luck!!
  9. kelseygirl707

    kelseygirl707 Dances with Chickens

    Mar 3, 2009
    Lakeport, Ca.
    No, we don't actually plan to sell her, My husband just feels really guilty that she bonded to him so fast, so in his mind, by saying he's going to sell her because she doesn't like me, he is sticking up for me, LOL. Also we would never hit her or the cage. Right now what we are doing is my husband is talking to her, but not holding her, kinda making it so if she wants to be held, it's gotta be by me, also she loves peanuts, so only I can give her peanuts. We got this advice from a local Sun Conure breeder, she said to let Karmen know that my husband loves her, but for a week or so, make it so she is only held by me.

    Also, yesterday I asked my husband why Karmen was being such a "Female dog" to me, and at that moment Karmen said my name, she has only heard my name a couple of times, but yet that is the one word she has learned from us... Anyway, now almost everytime I or my husband says the word for "Female Dog" she says my name, or if my husband says "who's a "Female Dog"" She says my name, now I know she doesn't actually know what that word means, but it kinda freaks me out.

    Our next step is to have my husband take Karmen out of her cage, set her on my chest then leave the room, then I'm supposed to place one hand over her head, and pet her with the other, if she bites me I am suppsed to not stop her, but tell her "NO" in a low voice. This was also advice from a breeder, so I guess we'll just have to see what happens.
  10. WalkingWolf

    WalkingWolf Songster

    Jan 1, 2009
    North Carolina
    Quote:[​IMG] I have had parrots for years, please buy plenty of gauze and surgical tape. If you can go through the full power of a bite from a conure my hats off to you.

    This is common behavior for parrots, they really don't understand discipline and no is not a term that they can relate to. Parrots can only be trained with positive rewards. Trust me they have a memory and will get even when least expected. My wife's Quaker hated to have his caged cleaned whenever I did it I had to trick him out of the cage. So usually the next day he would come out attempt to snuggle and give kisses and latch onto the septum of my nose.

    Some parrots are the type that are very social such as cockatoos and cockatiels, some make bonds that are severe. Your parrot sees you as a competitor for her new mate. When he is gone you are no danger to her bo. She may get over it in time she may not. Actually if she is not drawing blood or breaking bones she is just warning you. Yes parrots can do that we once had a cockatoo that broke the welds on a wrought iron cage. Her quaker could make quick work of hard wood limb, would turn closepin halfs into toothpicks instantly.

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