handling is the key. I have spent all the time in the world with mine - giving them treats, having them eat out of my hands, talking to them, sitting with them, etc, etc. Hours every single day without fail. I just never forced them to be held because I was told it was bad. Now I know that it's not bad - it's crucial. Spending time won't help much unless you also force them to be held. Please note it is a key difference.