I am so frustrated and depressed right now.

[RubberChickenLubber]

My husband and I get one date every 2 months because we don't really have anyone in the family to watch the kids. His aunt will, but I hate to ask her to often, because she has so many grandkids and is always watching one of them. She always says that since my hubby's mom died that she thinks of our kids (3 and 4) as her grandkids. Well, she hasn't watched the kids since valentines day. She was supposed to watch them the first weekend in april, but due to a death in the family, she couldn't (which I completely understood). So I asked her 2 weeks ago if she could watch the kids for us sometime in the next few weeks, and she said she could this weekend. I asked again last sunday to make sure she was still online with it, and she said yes. So I call this morning to make sure everything was still ok, well, she has to pick her 25 yr old son up from work and take him home. He does drugs, and has lost his license due to not paying his brother child support for his daughter that the brother is raising. I know this is her son, and I'm trying to understand, but i'm sooo depressed. She said she can next week, but I'm to the point of just saying don't worry about it. It's easier not to expect something of someone, than to expect it and be let down. Sorry for the rant, just had to get it out.

 

[gabrielle1976]

I understand , Im a single mom and have gone out MAYBE a dozen times EVER scicne my son was born 4 years ago . I also feel dissapointed with people some times, I tend not to ask people very often at all , partly becuase I dont trust just about anyone with my son and also becuase it seems people always say "oh if you ever need me to watch him just let me know and Id love to do it" these people have yet to ever come thru for me EVER they keep saying it though and for one reason or another they never are availble so I gave up , My best friend of more then 20 years will watch him in an emergancy if she isnt sleeping and my sister I can talk into it for about 3 hours every 6 months or so , thats it so unless Im in the hospital or something my son is with me and I dont go out unless he is with me , I found I do enjoy going places with him and if they dont want me there cuase I have a 4 year old with me then its there problem and Ill go somewhere else.
I wish I was closer Id watch the kiddo for you so you and youre husband can go out .
Have you thought of haveing a date at youe house after bed time , have a fancy dessert and watch a new movie and do whatever .
Good luck

 

[astylishgirl]

I know just how you feel. My new husband and I NEVER get any time to ourselves. And we are dealing with my girls who are not always supportive of having a new stepfather who is not quite as lenient as I am. Even when their dad comes to town, one of them ALWAYS wants to come home to sleep.

Our one year anniversary will be this August and I don't think we have had two nights alone to go out together. When we do have a few moments alone at the house, we are just so tired!

He and I have always had a warm and romantic relationship. I hate to see that take such a backseat to life. But it just seems to be doing that.

I got the beautiful Afghan. Thank you so much! I will be taking it to baby Daisy this weekend in the hospital. It will mean a lot to her mother.

 

[TennesseeTruly]

I know its hard to make time when you're a parent. I'm a mom of 6 grown children and it was hard when they were little to do anything because I just didn't trust many people with our children.

Now that my husband and I are retired, we thought we would be able to enjoy each other. Instead we are raising our 8 year old grandson AND are new to the area where we live AND he has disabilities so he can't be left with just anyone. Please don't think I'm complaining, I'm not. I would do it over in a heartbeat. Sometimes I really want some "ME" or "US" time.

What I'm trying to say is that I sympathize with you hun. Its not an easy road to travel. I just want to tell you that it WILL get better... eventually.

Laurie

 

[FunnyFarmer]

Yeah, that's rough. It's always worse when you actually have something lined up and then it falls through. I remember that from when my kids were little. 3 and 4 is a tough time--hang in there. It does get easier.

 

[RubberChickenLubber]

It's worse today than it would have been any other week. It's that time of the month, and my hormones are already messed up, and so any emotion is going to be amplified. I'm so depressed right now it isn't funny. I stay at home with the kids, so this one night every 2 months is my "day off'. I know it sounds so petty, and it does toi me too...lol. I just can't get over it right yet, but I'm trying.

 

[astylishgirl]

How about a nice hot bubble bath and a good book? That is my only escape sometimes!

 

[RubberChickenLubber]

Quote:
I do that sometimes, but not too effective when the kids are screaming and fighting. Plus not quite the same as going out to dinner with hubby by ourselves. I had expected to go out to eat, but now I'm so frustrated, I told hubby that I'm just going to cook.

 

[kingmt]

I understand not having someone to watch your kids. I rarely try to find someone & don't want someone else most of the time but there is those times when there is a emergency & the kids should not be there. I don't relate to the dates though because I love to be with my kids & never get tired of it. I have three that are 6, 4, & 1 (today).

At night when they are asleep my wife goes to bed so she must not be that interested in time alone ether.

My whole family is what makes me happy so life doesn't get in the way.

 

[OlliOlliOlli]

If it makes you feel better, at least you can have kids to begin with...I cannot financially wing it until I am at least in my mid-30's at this rate, I don't have a nuclear/extended family that will take care of a baby for even a few hours if I needed it, and my partner doesn't seem to have a better situation.

I just hope things look up for me so that maybe one day I can take that plunge.

I get tired of having to believe my own line of crap that "I'm better off not being married and not having kids." My heart is really crying inside.