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I don't know what decision was right!

Discussion in 'Family Life - Stories, Pictures & Updates' started by I have WHAT in my yard?, Jul 17, 2010.

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  1. Jul 17, 2010 #1
    I have WHAT in my yard?

    I have WHAT in my yard? Songster

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    Yesterday we spontaneously went to the beach. It was a last minute decision, DH was off and now working so we felt we could afford it. After a decent day on the beach the kids were tired and one was sunburned. We went to the boardwalk on the next town over for dinner and ice cream. It was late we were leaving, it was after their bedtime and we were not even at the car yet. The meter was about to expire and the sunburned kid was cooked. Dh stopped with one kid to grab a cone a few yards from the car. The little one was sitting on a bench barely able to keep her eyes open.

    A man I recognized walks up to me and tells me my uncle was a few blocks away sitting on the boardwalk.

    I haven't seen him in months and know he is pretty down since my aunt's death. But, Dh was freaking about the meter (its a monster ticket in this town.) we said we'd walk back to the car and let him and the kids wait in the car while I run back to say hi. By the time we get the kids loaded, they;'re both crying, we had over done it. I wasn't sure where he was and we could not get parking anywhere closer to where we thought he was. DH said forget it it is too late, the kids are too fried. It's a two and a half hour ride. We went home.

    I feel really guilty. If we had spotted him earlier I would have loved to have seen him. I was afraid if I got to see him even he'd want us to stay and talk. I think I made the wrong decision, but I am not sure how I could have done otherwise. Did I do wrong??
     
  2. Jul 17, 2010 #2
    smileybritches

    smileybritches Songster

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    I'm not sure you could have made any other decision, call your uncle or make an effort to contact him, then you would have the time he would need.
     
  3. Jul 17, 2010 #3
    smileybritches

    smileybritches Songster

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    In other words you would have felt rushed and not been able to give him your full attention. I'm trying to make sense today [​IMG]
     
  4. Jul 17, 2010 #4
    Whispering Winds

    Whispering Winds Songster

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    It was a snap decision to go; family comes first, meaning your DH and little ones, and don't feel bad. If you hadn't went, you wouldn't even have known he was out and about. Call him, send him a card. I love letters, you can hold them in your hands and read them over and over and while a phone call is nice, its gone when its over.
     
  5. Jul 17, 2010 #5
    pdsavage

    pdsavage Sussex Monarch

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    You can't go back and change what you did,if you feel bad take him to lunch,send him a nice card or call him.
     
  6. Jul 17, 2010 #6
    mom'sfolly

    mom'sfolly Crowing

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    You did right. You had kids in meltdown mode, and you and your dh were fried too. Your uncle is an adult, and can cope. You can send a nice note, with something like "I heard you were at the beach the same day we were, I wish we could have run into you. It made me keep thinking of you, so I thought I would write." That acknowledges that you heard he was there, says you regret a missed opportunity, and are thinking of him. I think it covers everything, and lets him know that any failure to meet was accidental.
     
  7. Jul 17, 2010 #7
    sourland

    sourland Broody Magician Premium Member 9 Years

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    Your kids had to come first. Make a point of contacting your uncle as soon as is possible. Life is all about making decisions and doing what we have to do. Nothing wrong with your decision.
     
  8. Jul 17, 2010 #8
    Melissa034

    Melissa034 Chirping

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    you made the right decision. Little cranky ones would have made the visit misable anyway. It would be nice if maybe you and the kids and hubby(if available) could maybe go for a day visit with him and have lunch or something. After losing his wife, Im sure hed enjoy the company.
     
  9. Jul 18, 2010 #9
    Whitehouse Quail

    Whitehouse Quail Songster

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    You're fine! Just call Uncle and say "Saw you at the beach! Sorry I couldn't stop and talk, the kids had to get home" or something like that. [​IMG]
     
  10. Jul 18, 2010 #10
    CoopCrazy

    CoopCrazy Brooder Boss

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    Quote:I agree.. We have all done this at once time or another (esp.us with KIDS).. I would give him a call and let him know you were trying to get to him but had to take care of the kiddos.. I think he will just be happy to hear from you so he wont be upset oyu didnt get to talk to him ..
     
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