I'm so gonna be a jerk and vent on the sly

[kinnip]

I'm going to complain about my wonderful, patient boyfriend behind his back. I've been really sick with Lyme disease. I'm not getting around so well and I'm taking a lot of painkillers. Usually, I take care of all the farm stuff. It's a job and a half, but I have a system. Since the illness from hell, the BF has been taking care of everything, kinda. We've had one poult die for mystery reasons, and a second doesn't look so good. The brooders and coops are a wreck. These things I can deal with. They aren't to the point of being a health hazard for everyone yet. The clincher was when I dragged my butt out of bed this morning and looked outside to find all the chickens loose. He didn't lock them up last night! Grrr! He already feels bad about it, so I just let it go, but this cannot happen again. I'm sure after watching me shuffle out there tonight to do it myself he won't forget again. I think he really is doing his best. He just doesn't have the flow it takes to keep all this chaos going in the right direction. O.K., vent over.

 

[hypnofrogstevie]

mistakes happen. I have done that before. Are the chickens ok?

 

[Henrietta23]

We've done it before too. I beat myself up for it but we've mostly been lucky. We also always count beaks and bills when we lock up. One night my DH didn't and we woke up to find our favorite BR hen dead in the yard. It was a cold night and she wasn't a spring chicken but I was still very sad and angry for a bit.
I hope you feel better soon. I have relatives who've had bad case of Lyme Disease. No fun at all.

 

[kinnip]

Yeah, they're fine. He is trying. It's just frustrating sitting here watching and not doing.

 

[Dar]

mistakes can happen...if a predator picks off a chicken or the coop goes uncleaned for a while...it is a little issue...

you on the other hand should be focusing on getting better! chickens can be replaced you cant!

 

[klf73]

would a checklist help him? My dh has TBI(traumatic brain injury) and he has no short term memory, sometimes he forgets he's supposed to pick the kids up from the bus(luckily they are old enough to walk down our road). I give him a list and he checks it all day....it really helps. I am thinking since he isn't used to doing everything the list would help him?

 

[kinnip]

I thought about it, but he doesn't handle criticism well, thus the venting on the sly.

 

[lockedhearts]

Quote:
I used to get so worked up when I got sick or went on vacation because "no one can take care of my animals the way I can"

As I have gotten older, I have learned to "Let it go" yes way easier to say than do. He is trying and working at the same time. Getting frustrated is also not helping you either. Relax, he will get better and if it is not 100% like you do it , they will survive.

And if you need help, let me know, I am not that far and would be happy to do what I can.

Hope you feel better!

 

[aidenbaby]

You could present a list without being critical. By saying something along the lines of, "Honey, I really appreciate everything that you've been doing. I wanted to write out the order of how I do things that I've found to be less time consuming." Ok, probably not the best words but something like that might work. I fon't know if you've ever heard about it but there is a website called FlyLady.com and she's real big into writing out your routines in a master control journal so that if something happens in a emergency your SO or whoever will know what routines the household is used to. (BTW, it's a great website for people like me who are not born organized.)

 

[kinnip]

Thanks for the suggestions. I might try that masterlog. I've been meaning to compile something of the sort anyway.
Karen, you're a sweetheart. Thanks for the offer of help. The pain in my hips is greatly diminished, so I'm able to get around enough to fill some waterers and feeders. Oddly, the hyperactive roo seems to know I don't feel well and hasn't tried to flog me yet.