It's Been More Than 6 Months

[restelle]

My Molly shown in the photo lived 14 1/2 years and she passed away on January 4th of this year.

I have not been able to deal with this loss - time doesn't seem to matter. I don't know what to do.

I suffer 24/7 and can't seem to accept that she's gone.

She was born on July 18th, 2010 and I still can't believe this.

What can I do? I am probably too old to raise more babies and my health is very poor.

I don't want to be alone for the rest of my life, but I can't risk taking on another if my life ends before theirs - and I don't want to go through another loss.

I'm pretty sure that I don't have 14+ years left.

 

[Finchbreeder]

Have you thought of volunteering as a "rescue mum"
A friend of mine who lost her pup and had the same life time issues did this.

 

[restelle]

That's interesting. I don't know where I would go. I live in a town of less than 1000 people in the middle of Missouri, I can't drive at night due to vision issues, or in the winter due to ice.

 

[Goosebaby]

My Molly shown in the photo lived 14 1/2 years and she passed away on January 4th of this year.

I have not been able to deal with this loss - time doesn't seem to matter. I don't know what to do.

I suffer 24/7 and can't seem to accept that she's gone.

She was born on July 18th, 2010 and I still can't believe this.

What can I do? I am probably too old to raise more babies and my health is very poor.

I don't want to be alone for the rest of my life, but I can't risk taking on another if my life ends before theirs - and I don't want to go through another loss.

I'm pretty sure that I don't have 14+ years left.

I’m so sorry. My geese and ducks are my life and losing those I’ve lost has been unbearable. I understand your pain and I know there really isn’t much anyone can say to lessen your pain.

I will say this though, Molly was nearly 15 years old, she lived an exceptionally long life and if that picture is any indication she had a sparkle in her eye even in her last days, she knew she was deeply loved and cared for.
The worst part about losing one of my feather babies is losing them when they’re young, I don’t just grieve them, I grieve the life they should have lived but was taken from them. Losing them when they’re young is a whole different level of pain, but you gave Molly a very full life full of love. I know you’re heartbroken for her loss but I hope you take comfort knowing that she lived a long full life, and that’s the best any of us can hope for any of our loved ones.

I like to think that none of those we love are really gone, though our bodies fail us our souls are still connected to each other wherever we may be by the love we share and that we can still sense each other by that love we feel.

 

[restelle]

Thank you! But I miss her so much.

I cry for her every day. I took her to an avian vet that was from Cornell and she said we are in uncharted territory,

I feel as though I failed her and it's my fault.

Her sibling - a drake is still going full speed. And he loves to attack me!

I know Molly is in Heaven, even though some pastors say otherwise about pets, I say that God can do what He wants...

 

[Goosebaby]

Thank you! But I miss her so much.

I cry for her every day. I took her to an avian vet that was from Cornell and she said we are in uncharted territory,

I feel as though I failed her and it's my fault.

Her sibling - a drake is still going full speed. And he loves to attack me!

I know Molly is in Heaven, even though some pastors say otherwise about pets, I say that God can do what He wants...

It’s okay to feel that way. You’ve lost a dear little soul and it’s normal to grieve. You did not fail her but I understand why you feel that way, I’ve blamed myself in the same situation, but you need to remember that you didn’t fail her, quite the opposite, you gave her a good home and made sure she felt loved.
This was her time, she lived a very long life and it was her time to move on and there’s nothing you could have done to change that.
Her brother is probably feeling loss too so I’m glad that he also has you to give him the same care. Drakes are such silly little beings, they show affection in the most peculiar ways, usually involving nips. It helps to have someone else to look after so I hope you two can help each other in this way, give him lots of snuggles.

And there absolutely are animals in the afterlife, their souls are equal to ours.

 

[restelle]

Yeah, her brother Spaz is a monster, but I love him too.

God showed me pets in the afterlife and I know it's 100% true.

I miss Molly so much that I started smoking 4 packs of cigarettes a day and drinking a pint of Vodka in the evening to help me sleep.

 

[Finchbreeder]

Oops lay off the ciggies they are definately not good for you.
Booze is a personal choice.
But back to your search for a way of caring without the concerns of time/life balance.
In a small town you may find the local school has something suitable in the way of a school farm?
Can't hurt to go talk to them - and if they don't maybe offer to help them set one up - so the kids can learn the joys you had.

 

[Goosebaby]

Yeah, her brother Spaz is a monster, but I love him too.

God showed me pets in the afterlife and I know it's 100% true.

I miss Molly so much that I started smoking 4 packs of cigarettes a day and drinking a pint of Vodka in the evening to help me sleep.

You need to take care of yourself to be able to take care of Spaz, he needs you too. Please lay off the cigarettes and vodka.