My fiances EX

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You mean the Hatfield kid? His name isnt Justin.

huh? is it late and I missed a joke...like the mccoys or something?

I thought you were talking bout the Hatfield boy that does beauty pageants.
but you dont i guess
 
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huh? is it late and I missed a joke...like the mccoys or something?

I thought you were talking bout the Hatfield boy that does beauty pageants.
but you dont i guess

lol no. ((sigh)) I wish I could joke about it)
My boyfriends mother owned Fred Astaire dance studios in Florida while she was alive and some of the male instructors had a thing for him that he was completely oblivious to.
 
She just started this coming around bs recently, like 6 months ago. My fiance is NOT nice to her at all. You should hear some of the stuff he says to her! I would be embarrased to come back after that tongue lashing, but she does.
 
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then HE needs to step it up Debi!....call the cops...whatever!....YOU SHOULD NOT have to get involved and risk getting in trouble *fighting* with her...know what i mean?......its HIS EX.....his problem!....
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..good luck to you!, Wendy
 
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Then you both may need to change your tactics because you are now predictable in her eyes......

Firstly she no doubt enjoys knowing that she upsets both of you and gets a "kick" out of it......hence she keeps coming over for the most idiotic excuse...

Next time dont get angry either of you.....be exceptionally polite (do not smile), keep your voices very low key and tell her frostily...

Thank you for your time and effort in coming over to deliver ...(what ever it is)....however you will find that these items are now two years old, out of fashion, and are not needed by OUR children, consequently be so kind as to donate them to your nearest charity shop....WE as a family have no need of them. Do not call uninvited to OUR home again it is totally unnecessary. Rest assured that should you attend at OUR home again uninvited you will leave me with no option other than to have a restraining order issued for your harassment. Thank you. (Close the door immediately without giving her the chance to reply....but DONT slam it, she will expect that!)

Try it that way Debs you are a far greater Lady than her anyway...but keep you cool even if it kills you to......then let us all know........remember she wants your reaction to be anger.....always do the opposite....good luck x
 
invite her in for coffee and a chat
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maybe she will stop if she knows it doesnt bother you besides if they have kids together it may be to your advantage to be friendly with her. It took my boyfriend a little while to see that my sons father and I having a friendship of sorts was the best, less stressful way to go. Im civil to his ex when I see her (its been a while though) because since he took the same approach she backed off. Then suggest she puts things she finds in a box and offer to come to her house to pick up these items. There are those people out there who are just a little psycho but it may work if you try it. Best of luck.

eta, just saw the kids arent hers but my step father always says kill them with kindness.
 
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Deb - you've gotten a lot of really good advice - I especially like EC's and ams3651's take on it. Like they say about children - even negative attention is attention. And, let's face it - some people are just simply addicted to drama. My sister's that way and I have found that by remaining absolutely unflappable and non-responsive it goes away. She thinks I'm a (insert character-debasing expletives here) BECAUSE I won't play along.
 
Here's what I'd do. The next time she shows up (hopefully, there will not be a next time) be very friendly and start telling her about the wedding plans. Then you and your fiance start "getting cute" in front of her. Then forget she's there.
If she won't take NO for an answer, embarrass her into leaving.
 

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