My housemate is dying

[Judy]

We have shared a household for over 30 years. My 33 year old son calls her his Aunt, and is much closer to her than he is to his father. She has declined surgery for a life threatening condition, which most would agree is a sensible decision, if I recounted the whole medical story. She is not expected to live more than a few more days. She is lucid, and is at peace with her choice; she is ready. Her doctor is quite compassionate. They prayed together today, she told me with a certain peacefulness, and she is not really a religious person.

We talked today about who she wanted to know, and I have dealt with that. She will probably have more visitors tomorrow than she wants, but I will be there, and be sure she is kept comfortable. The hospital and nurses are wonderful (we are both nurses; we would know.)

So what is the problem? I do not want to leave a stone unturned. I don't want any regrets.

 

[BoiseBubba]

If you love her, let her have her choice, don't try to change her mind, you don't want someone to dislike you as they die,let her have peace, spend as much time as possible with her, do what you can to make her last days the best that she ever had!

I'm sorry for what your going through, I will pray for peace for both her and you, don't fret, you still have your family and your pets and your friends!

 

[Eggs4Sale]

 

[Eggs4Sale]

Quote:
Understandable. I wish the best for you, all three of you.

 

[DuckLady]

I am so sorry.

 

[JewellFarm]

I am so sorry. It has to be very hard for you. Just be with her.

 

[92caddy]

My thoughts and prayers to you both..........

 

[Enchanted Sunrise Farms]

i have been with many family members before and at their point of death. In fact, most of my family is gone. My only regrets are that i did not say "i love you" one more time, or give one more hug. That, and i wish i would have been still and listened more to the stories they told throughout their lifetime.

Just be there for her . . . listen . . . don't be afraid. Being a nurse, i know you have dealt with these difficult situations many times. A little more personal when it is someone you love.

i wish you strength and courage and peacefulness as you tend to your friend in her last days on this earth.

 

[Judy]

Quote:
I would not dream of trying to change her mind. She knows what she wants. None of my business, really. I don't disagree with her, her choice is sensible to me, but it would not matter if I did.

If I saw a need to do something that would cause her to dislike me, I would do what she needed, regardless. She is lucid, so that is not an issue.

She does not want people hanging around. She has excellent nursing care, and that is all she wants now. She is also a retired nurse, so what should be provided is also not lost on her!

Her best days will not be her last ones, they will be ones in her memory, and in the memory of those who love her. Fortunately, she can still share some of these with those around her.

I can only help make her last days comfortable, which is all she hopes for now.

I do thank all of you for your good wishes and support.

 

[jjdward]

So sorry to hear of your sorrow. I know this is hard and you are both in my prayers. The Bible says that the angles rejoice a the passing of a Saint. Its good to know that she is at peace with her choice.