My leukemia's back.

[sourland]

@getaclue time to educate the purported educators. Part of it was me, but I can count the truly GOOD teachers that I have encountered on one hand. I was that kid and empathize with your grandson. It's good that you are there to advocate for him.

 

[bruceha2000]

Sounds like strike 1 is strike 3! What about parent teacher conferences to discuss this perceived problem before giving such an ultimatum. And as for the teachers diagnosing ADHA? They do not have that ability, they aren't trained for it. They can "assume" based on other kids with diagnosed ADHD but sorry, no they can't make that determination nor require a parent to tell a doctor to do so. Time to talk to the principal of the school.

 

[Bunnylady]

And as for the teachers diagnosing ADHA? They do not have that ability, they aren't trained for it. They can "assume" based on other kids with diagnosed ADHD but sorry, no they can't make that determination nor require a parent to tell a doctor to do so. Time to talk to the principal of the school.

Major, major X2 on this one! I don't care how long (s)he has been teaching, no teacher is qualified to make such a diagnosis - nor, perhaps, would a pediatrician necessarily be, come to that. There are a slew of other conditions besides ADHD that can cause a child to lose focus. "Over any abuse he might have suffered?" Really? Really?? This sounds like "I have formed my conclusion, and I'm always right, so I will dismiss anything else anyone else may ever bring to the table, because I am always right." What a pathetic, narrow-minded perspective.

Good therapists can teach you coping mechanisms to help keep the bad stuff from ruling your life, but they can't make the past go away. Healing takes time, and it is never linear nor does it care about schedules - how dare this so-called educator assume that they know how long it should take this damaged young person to get back to them? You said "language," and my mind started buzzing around the Autism spectrum and dyslexia; this child may have multiple issues he is coping with.

DD, I'm sorry you are still occasionally triggered into dealing with the scars of your past.It would be so handy if we could just erase the unpleasant memories, but minds don't seem to work like that (and when they do, it's often seen as a sign that they aren't working).

 

[getaclue]

We've discussed a plan of action. She's going to talk to his therapist about this. A letter from the therapist, stating she's aware of the situation, etc. will offer proof that Dd is addressing the problem, and the school can't take any action against her for ignoring her son's needs. The therapist is licensed, and accredited in this state, so they have to accept it, and any diagnosis, or recommendations made.

 

[ronott1]

We've discussed a plan of action. She's going to talk to his therapist about this. A letter from the therapist, stating she's aware of the situation, etc. will offer proof that Dd is addressing the problem, and the school can't take any action against her for ignoring her son's needs. The therapist is licensed, and accredited in this state, so they have to accept it, and any diagnosis, or recommendations made.

New Guidelines came out this week that said Therapy should be tried first with children. Schools and Dr.s are pretty much against this guideline-- they like the instant result of the drugs.

It is quite sad! Long term drugs are not often the best way to go and especially with children

 

[bruceha2000]

It is quite sad! Long term drugs are not often the best way to go and especially with children

x1000
Yeah let's just go for the "quick fix" that may not be addressing the problem and if chemical very likely will have side effects.

 

[getaclue]

We live in an instant gratification society now. It's sad really. Dd found his original diagnosis, and a follow up diagnoses. Everything the teachers mentioned, is covered in the original diagnosis, and subsequent evaluations. The school he went to last year, removed it from his permanent record. We'll get it straightened out.

 

[oldrooster]

Now, I'm really getting cheesed off at the school system out here where we live. Dd came home from a parent-teacher conference this afternoon, all shook up. My grandson's teachers have decided he's got ADHD, and decided she needs to go to her pediatrician, and do whatever to have him declared as such. If she does not, they're going to take action against her. He's not a behavioral problem. He's above average in math. He seems to be lagging a little in vocabulary, particularly with the meanings of some words, and he struggles a little when it comes to writing sentences. His attention span in English class is good for about 20 minutes, then he seems to lose focus, or have difficulty concentrating. He's 8 years old. He does not advocate for himself well, meaning he won't ask for help, when he's struggling, and when one of his teachers sees he's struggling, and calls him out, to help him, at first, he loses focus. BUT, when he's focused, his reading skills are excellent, and at those time, his teachers have him lead his reading group, because he's so good.

My daughter explained that he had a couple years of speech therapy which continued until he finished first grade. That initially put him behind, but he caught up, and was doing well in first grade. He was a little above target in his reading, and language skills when he finished first grade. They moved, and he attended a different school for second grade, which had not adopted the new curriculum, and he had very lazy teachers. When he asked them for help, he was chastised. There could easily be somewhat of a learning gap, due to the differences in the two curriculum. The problem with advocating for himself will be overcome in time, when he realizes he will not be punished by them, when he asks for help.

As to his attention span, him not advocating for himself, and loosing focus when they call him out, she explained that these are not necessarily symptoms of ADHD. He was abused, mostly verbally at first, which escalated over time, then it escalated to physical abuse too for a period of time. He had been in counseling for it, and the therapist explained that there would always be a few scars from it, and certain triggers. One of the triggers, which makes him very nervous, is to be singled out, and called out. It's not so much his inability to focus, rather it triggers bad memories for a few minutes, until he gets it back under control. His teachers asked how long it's been since he was last abused, and she told them it's been 3 years now. They assured her that he was well over any abuse he might have suffered then, and any triggers should not last more than 1 - 2 minutes.

I was flabbergasted. First, they're saying he's not below average when he focuses, but he's not always focused, and then he's below average. No consistency. You don't go from being below average, to above average, to below average, to above average. It just doesn't happen that way. Second, due to the emotional disorder, which he's been getting counseling for, he's entitled to certain services that the school is to be providing. They're not mentioning, or recognizing that.

I told DD to start with his therapist, and let her know what's going on. A letter from her, will get things rolling in her favor. The school can NOT override a licensed therapist, that has diagnosed him with an emotional disorder, into forcing him to be treated for ADHD. In addition, because of the emotional disorder, the school has to test him in a multitude of things, and those tests are excellent. They will tell the whole story.

Talk with the therapist yes and tell them the past schools what they tried and worked out with him and have that included in the letter and ask the therapist what local/state/fed laws are in place that you can have a learning plan and what is expected of the teachers parents admins. and the child (most states have such laws they are different and named different in each state) but he should have a written plan, and if they call cps on them and tell them what all has happened...

oldrooster, when I live in an apartment, ALL neighbors are on a nod in passing by them, or a "hello" when passing by them, but keep moving on, situation. I did not try making it a resource for a pool of friends. Over the years, there were two couples that we eventually did get to know, and socialize with. On a very limited basis at first, then more over time. There are too many that come, and go, and too many druggies, and nut cases for it to be considered a resource for making friends. It can happen, but it takes a LONG time.

I have limited to trying to be friendly, perhaps not friends with the closest people to me and the negative person was less than a football field accross the parking lot from my door, that's the only reason I went to introduce myself to her. not really wanting to be a friend but at least be cordial to her. if we became friends great. but I wanted to at least try to be nice to those I'd see the most. I did find a gruop of nice people near our community building that have all been so far nice and friendly I understand many many here are not quality people and to be avoided as much as possible. but if I can find a few friends here great, if not I tried.

 

[getaclue]

DD, I will be one of the first to say that being a caregiver is a hard, thankless, job. Being caregiver to a difficult, or angry person, is HE double hockey sticks. A friend of mine, went through that for several years with her husband, until he recently passed away. He never was an overly nice person to begin with. She accepted his behavior.

One of the times he was in the hospital, he was so bad, all his nurses dreaded dealing with him. I suggested she talk to one of his doctors about putting him on a mild tranquilizer, since even the nurses had complained about him. She did. His doctor put him on a mild tranquilizer, and it made a LOT of difference. A couple times, when things were going on that had him extra agitated, she was to increase his morning dose by half a pill, for a couple days, then go back down to the normal dose. It made a HUGE difference.

 

[getaclue]

The reason I'm familiar with school testing, and the results it can produce, are from experience with my own children. My children went to private school for several years. At a certain point, a friend of mine began encouraging me to homeschool. I was fortunate that in my area, there was a large, active homeschooling group. The girls and I did very well with it.

When I went through my divorce, my ex had his lawyer demand I put them in public school, because he claimed I was not really schooling them, and they were not getting a good education. I was court ordered to take them to a specialist in that field, named Dr. Silverman. He deemed the girls to be Educable Mentally Handicapped, and that I was not teaching them, nor could I, since they were special needs children, and I was not qualified to teach special needs children. I was court ordered to put them in public school. I did.

I had spoken to the principal, about my ex being a nasty piece of work, and produced the court orders that he was NOT to have access to the girls on school property. I suspect she thought I was a bit nuts at the time. The girls were all middle school age, and attended mainstream classes for 2 report card periods, when his lawyer threatened to sue the school, if they were not put into Educable Mentally Handicapped, special needs classes. In the meantime, my ex had been caught making contact with the girls at school. He used the excuse that he was entitled to access their records, and check out how they were doing in school.

A meeting was called between me, the principal, the main school psychologist, and the girls' teachers. The girls were making A's, and B's on their report cards, except for a C in Geometry. My argument was that, even children without any learning issues did not always maintain A & B levels in their classes, and they had to provide an education that match the child's learning abilities, regardless. No one in the room thought the girls should be places in lower learning, but the school didn't want to be sued either. It was mentioned during the course of the meeting that they had a new volunteer psychologist, named Dr. Silverman. Yes, it was the same one. When I mentioned that he was the one behind the whole thing, and that's who I had been court ordered to evaluate my girls regarding their education, the principal asked for proof. A couple days later, I took the paperwork where I was court ordered to take the girls to Dr. Silverman, and the results of his evaluation on them. When the principal saw the paperwork, was the turning point. I also called my lawyer, and we threatened to counter sue, if they put them in lower learning classes, since they were maintaining good grades in mainstream classes.

A couple weeks later, I was called into another meeting. The principal, and main school psychologist had been busy bees. When I was able to produce the paperwork regarding Dr. Silverman, the principal showed it to the main school psychologist, and it was discussed on how to proceed.

At the meeting, I was informed they had picked the day they did, because it was Dr. Silverman's day off. I discovered that anyone accessing the students' records have their own log in, and password. The principal has the ability to block access to student records to the log in, and password of any faculty she needs to. They blocked Dr. Silverman's ability to access the girls' records, and the main psychologist was careful to log off from her computer, if he was going to access it. They were going to have the girls totally tested, and evaluated, which would be the deciding factor, but they did not want the testing done there, so it could not be influenced in any way by Dr. Silverman. In a couple weeks, the school board was sending in some psychologists to the local high school, and the girls would be tested there.

The girls were tested, and the depth of the results were amazing to me. Above average IQ's. No learning disabilities. They were above level for most things, but there were a couple gaps, but not too bad, with the exception of Geometry. 2 could easily learn with just audio, but 1 learned better when both audio, and visuals were used. I produced the curriculum I had been using. The gaps were not really gaps, but differences in when concepts were introduced during the course. The curriculum I used, introduced Algebra first, then Geometry during the latter part of the school year. The public school curriculum introduced Geometry first, then Algebra. By the way, they breezed through Algebra, since we had already covered it. Yes, I had done an excellent job homeschooling them.

The school board lawyers sent letters to both our lawyers about the testing, and they were placing the girls in accordance with the results of the testing. During this time, my ex had gotten caught talking to the girls on school property. This time the principal contacted the school board, with copies of my court orders. The school board's legal team sent letters to both our lawyers about the incident, and since he had violated court orders, he had been ordered off the school property, and was not to return. Report cards would be sent to his home address, and any further information he wanted pertaining to the girls, he could call, or send requests, and the school would send it to his home address.

That's how I know about the testing, and how detailed it is.