Office Work, Part Deux: Professional Mayhen

Discussion in 'Random Ramblings' started by scbatz33, Apr 8, 2011.

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  1. scbatz33

    scbatz33 No Vacancy, Belfry Full

    Jan 23, 2009
    South GA
    [​IMG]
     
  2. wegotchickens

    wegotchickens DownSouth D'Uccles & Silkies

    12,151
    25
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    Jul 5, 2007
    Sevier County, TN
    OFFICE WORK

    To People Who are Interested in Having Fun With Us:

    We are people who are grumpy, witty and on BYC as much as our employers / lives will permit us.
    On any given day, some of us can be on the thread, while others of us are hacking out spreadsheets, insurance inspection reports, child puke, or spreading state-mandated forest fires, so every day here is different.

    So, whatever day you can be on here, stay as long as you can, jab as many fellow-sufferers as you can, and enjoy! I know I do!


    Here are the phrase definitions for basic office work (courtesy of NellaBeans, cheery soul that she is)

    Thank you - I hate you
    I'll get right on that - you'll have it next week
    No problem - I hate you
    I'll add it to the pile - you are approximately 300th in line
    Revisions are no problem - your price just went up 20%
    I'll call you back as soon as I have an answer - don't hold your breath
    It shouldn't be too long - it'll be 3-4 hours at least
    Have a nice day - die in a fire, slowly

    For those not raised in the South:
    Bless your heart! = What an idiot....



    List of Cast Members:

    scbatz aka Batty:(as in many in her belfry) Horse and tack expert. Also an expert on surviving a large truck rollover with only Frankenstein-like scars to show for it. Wishing for a large piece of farmland with a lovely house in which to while away her many leisure hours. Not-so-secretly dreams of winning the lottery....

    SouthernBelle (aka Belle): the sweetest, most gentle nicest person on here. She remembers stuff about people and asks them about things six years later. Just had her 4th chick (I mean child) in December 2010. Her DH is a talented engineer but has yet to gain coping ability with household mechanisms such as dishes and cupboard doors. Googled the definition of Beaner's Brazillians and was scarred for life.

    Dacjohns (aka Dacs, Daccers): Is a nice enough guy, but lordy can the man talk! All day long, it's just yack yack yack. He fills up whole pages with his endlessly blathering posts. Other thread members are organizing a petition so that Nifty will re-direct all Dacs' posts to the popular "Morman Wildlife Biologist" thread...

    Wegotchickens (aka Wegot, Lori, We Here at Me): Is a drummer/drummist/percussionist in her community band. Loves her daughter very much. Is not, I repeat, NOT a hoarder - she is a "collector". Also known as Saucy Britches and everybody's bestest friend, she is curiously obsessed with the Duckle brand of chicken...

    Laree (aka Larry): Highly compensated (cough cough) genius with numbers, accounting, speadsheets and computer programs thereof. Loves numbers but loves her children even more. Is a shameless blogger on www.henway.com Sticks finger in fan on purpose, to rate pain level.
    Life mission: perfecting the stinkeye.

    Nellabeans (aka Nells, Beans, Beaner): Hateful, spiteful and fueled by chocolate eyeballs. Is personal accident-prone. Likes wine in large square packages. Bringer of the Pocky-clips. Or maybe just the horseperson of Death, depending on her mood. You don't want to know more. Especially the part about Brazillians. And cursing in Portugese. She haz skillz.

    AKMichelle (aka Vixen, Michelle, Chelle): Alaskan babe, engaged to Alaskan hunk. Has three gorgeous teen type kids. Moved into giant house with air traffic control tower and hot tub with aforementioned Alaskan hunk and has invited all of us to the wedding - suggested dress: leopard print! Does not (yet) have leopard print chickens, but plans to accessorize....
    Orchid (aka Orchy, Orchs, Orchidpants): Lives in godforsaken northern Minnesota and comforts herself by being outrageously tall, long-legged, attractive and athletic. Has little children, a disgustingly perfect husband (except that he likes his wife to undergo personal torture for his sake), and a very good sense of humor about HVAC repairmen. Has very big toes and is color blind [which explains some of her office outfits...]

    Buff Hooligans (aka Buffs, Buffy): Is much more perfect, yet humble, than any other person on this thread. Works several different part-time jobs because no one employer wants to have her around any more than necessary. (she wrote this and we're not editing it yet because the slacker wasn't on here when the new thread was made) Scared to google for fear of scars....

    Maple (aka Mapes, g~, Gretchen): Caution: she has a bad heart and little kids, so ALWAYS be nice to her. She could explode any second. And has, on occasion. Sadly lacking the "Shift" key on her computer keyboard... Frequently strays into the TMI zone... Assaults chicken vents.

    KSacres (aka Kelli): Goat lover, but currently goatless and chickenless. Is loving life as an unemployed gringa in Texas while her DH is serving our country. Has a bad eyeliner habit which she is trying to spread to the rest of us. Currently a bit player as she has abandoned us...

    IBDPoo, IBPoo, IDBPoo, ibepoo... whatever: Never could figure out her name. But she's nice, has ponies, goes to school, has grown kids, and is cheerful even though she has to get up extremely early in the morning.

    JBowyer01 (aka Bowwow, Bows) Works in a female parts office, bless her soul. Is nicely cynical and smart-mouthed. Has great potential on this thread. Bows is also bi-lingual, and has a Korean potty-mouth....

    Chicken Algebra Works for the State, she ain't sayin' which. Nickname is Algae, at least until she can pay one of us off enough to change it. Waits for the thread to start going downhill and then gives it a hard shove. Is single-handedly saving her town from underpopulation. Well, not exactly singlehandedly...
    Yet another bi-lingual member of the thread, she can start fights in Spanish. Her Brazillian is not the same as Beaner's.

    MSDebs Has vision problems (thinks hubby is still handsome even after a billion years together...) and a bad gallbladder. Is addicted to Black Copper Marans(s)ss.

    llllaaaadyel (aka Elke or Elkepants) Is a private accountant, is grumpy and in need of naps on a regular basis. She fits right in here.

    Debi Who traipses in and out and notices the little things.... Debi will be known for hairy rabbits and act like your dead goats.
     
    Last edited: Apr 25, 2011
  3. wegotchickens

    wegotchickens DownSouth D'Uccles & Silkies

    12,151
    25
    311
    Jul 5, 2007
    Sevier County, TN
    I feel like I should get another Winner badge....

    You know, to go next to the other imaginary Winner badge.
     
  4. scbatz33

    scbatz33 No Vacancy, Belfry Full

    Jan 23, 2009
    South GA
    Opps - Lori beat me to it. Maybe we should have gotten a committee together???
     
    Last edited: Apr 8, 2011
  5. AK Michelle

    AK Michelle Bad Girl of the North

    Mar 17, 2009
    Palmer, Alaska
    And it's snowing

    again

    [​IMG]
     
  6. scbatz33

    scbatz33 No Vacancy, Belfry Full

    Jan 23, 2009
    South GA
    Quote:YOU'RE the one living in Alaska!
     
  7. AK Michelle

    AK Michelle Bad Girl of the North

    Mar 17, 2009
    Palmer, Alaska
    And I wouldn't have it any other way
     
  8. NellaBean

    NellaBean Graceland Farms

    7,261
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    Mar 4, 2009
    Broodyland, TN
    My Coop
    Are we all supposed to post the intro post? Is that like being jumped into the officeworkers gang?
     
  9. scbatz33

    scbatz33 No Vacancy, Belfry Full

    Jan 23, 2009
    South GA
    Quote:No smart arse........We are gonna have each member kill a random person - like a real gang does!
     
  10. LarryPQ

    LarryPQ Easter Hatch!!

    10,884
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    Jul 17, 2009
    Quote:No smart arse........We are gonna have each member kill a random person - like a real gang does!

    Cant we just be jumped in by eating a whole tub of ice cream?
     
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