Prayer request- Friend not being the brightest crayon in the box.

[eenie114]

So I have a friend who I'll call Casey. Her situation is very similar to mine: Mother remarried, has several younger 1/2 siblings, mother and stepfather are Christian, father is not, etc.

She had her mom have gotten into several tiffs over the oh-so-important issue of whether or not she can wear bikinis and what music is on her iPod.

I personally think that her mom and stepdad need to loosen up (i.e. let her wear normal one-piece swimsuits rather than the built-in skirt, knee-length shorts in addition to the skirt, high neckline, uber-conservative ones you can get online) but they're raising her, not me.
All in all, she's got a good life.
But her grandmother (her father's mother) took her to a counselor for some unknown reason, and Casey told the counselor that she's not happy with her mom, she's too strict, and- this was the kicker- that she's scared of her stepdad.
Anybody who is scared of her stepdad has something they're hiding. VERY nice guy, in my experience. So either Casey is hiding something, or she's making it up so that she has some more leverage on her side.
So now she's staying with her dad for an undetermined length of time and they're trying to get a RESTRAINING ORDER against her stepdad.

Now, from what I've heard, and of course what I've heard is biased, her dad isn't the greatest guy. Hasn't held down a job in years.

I think she's having a "grass is greener" slash "Daddy's little girl" moment. Her dad is very obviously trying the age-old routine if being the nice, fun one while making the custodial parent out to be the evil, controlling Bad Guy. (Cue the scary music.

)
Her faith is very important to her, and mocked by her father and his family. She is NOT making a smart decision.

Prayers for Casey and her family would be very appreciated. She has four younger siblings from her mom's new marriage that would just be devastated if what she's asking for actually happened.

~Evelyn

 

[ben is a terror]

Prayers for all! Keep those lines of communication open.
Good Luck
GLY

 

[sfw2]

 

[MeatKing]

Prayers for all, Also yes keep those lines of communication open..

I really think you can't judge a book by it's cover.. There may be something else going on there that only she knows.. Just cause he is religous and seems to be a really nice guy, doesn't mean all is well. It could also be excatley as you are saying and the grass is greener.. But I would hate to see her losing trust in your friendship, when she needs you the most..

A lot of serial killers were boy next doors, religous, conservative super nice people.. There really could be more then meets the eye.. Either way, she needs a good friend like you!!

 

[violetsky]

I like the idea of bringing back a little modesty, but....just because someone
says/ acts one way does not mean they behave that way behind closed doors.
If she feels more secure with her dad despite having different values there's
probably a very good reason. If the stepdad is a little extreme with imposing
his ideas of modesty on that young girl, it maybe because of HIS immoral
thoughts. Usually a young girl has no clue the kind of response she is getting from
some men until its too late. Naturally, if the stepfather stepped over any moral
boundaries it would be because of the girls fault in his mind for her lack of modesty.
If my husband took an unhealthy strong interest in my daughter's hemlines he would
be history. God created us, so the human body should not be despised or shamed.
It's more appropiate for the mother to caution the daughter if she is wearing clothing
that is not representing their values not the stepfather. Support your friend by going
church with her, not questioning her decision to live with her father, it maybe for the best.
Sometimes its the grumpy old man that has a heart of gold and the really nice guy is really
evil just working hard to project an image.

 

[SourRoses]

I'm praying too Eenie

But I agree you shouldn't judge too quickly. Especially since we don't know all the facts.

For instance, theres the involvement of the grandmother, what did she hear or see that prompted her to take Casey to the psychiatrist?
Then theres the psychiatrist her/himself, they are not prone to over-reacting. They don't interefere in a childs living arrangements without reason, and it is hard to apply for a restraining order without a reason, without any incident having occured.

The best thing you could do for your friend, and yourself, is just keep an open mind. Try to be her friend in a normal way, as in talking about what you usually would and steer away from discussing her current situation. Just don't judge.

God knows the truth, the truth of the circumstance and the truth in peoples hearts, and He will resolve the matter in His own way.

 

[gritsar]

 

[eenie114]

Quote:
I would agree with this, except that the only reason she said she was "scared" of him is that he's strict. And it's not just her, it's all the kids. No tank tops on the one boy, either, knee-length shorts. And it's her mother, too, not just her stepdad.

To give you guys an idea of how unreasonable she is unfortunately being, she told them that she doesn't see why there have to be rules. She asked for them to quit making and enforcing familyrules.

Squishy: I don't think it was the counselor's idea to interfere with living arrangements, that was Casey and her father/grandmother. We ( and by we, I mean everybody from me to Casey's mother) have no clue WHY she was taken there, she hasn't elaborated.

Just hoping she comes home soon.

 

[SourRoses]

Well then, if she just wanted to go on a whim... and her father is somewhat like what you heard, I'm betting she'll be back in short order.
She is probably so used to the family structure of two parents and multiple siblings, that she's spoiled on it. Regular dinner times, siblings to love on AND be mad at, strict boundaries so she KNOWS they care.... those things are more tempting from the other pasture. And maybe once the whole thing is resolved, she will have a better perspective on her family and not be inclined to take it for granted.

God can work bad situations out for the better!

 

[turney31]

Prayers!