Really depressed

[Iridian]

I've just not been havng very good luck with becoming a chicken owner, and I'm totally wondering if I'm cut out for this. So this is sort of a rant/vent because I feel horrible today and need to get it out. I apologize in advance for the length of this and my epic blabbering here.

As soon as I found out I was allowed to keep 3 hens in my backyard I was so happy. I started reading everything I could on how to care for them, brooding, feeding, coop size and predator protection. I think I read for like 3 weeks straight. I started my small coop and run, collected my brooder supplies and studied breeds that would make great pets with the added bonus of eggs eventually. My 4 kids were thrilled right along with me, they are ages 9,9,7 and 5. Our local feed store was getting a big shipment in of day olds in a week and we were counting down the days.

I decided to try and get a brahma, orpington, easter egger, australorg and or a delaware based on size and temperment I thought any of these breeds would be a good fit for our micro-flock. At the feed store, they did in fact have them all except the delaware and australorp. We brought home 3 pullets excitedly. Within the day/night the buff orpington went downhill. I tried to make sure she was hydrated and stayed up with her all night, crying. She seemed to perk up a bit briefly and I finally went to sleep. When I woke up early the next morning she was dead, alone in a corner of the brooder. I was really sad, but I know from reading that some chicks just don't overcome the stress of traveling. I didn't want to tell the kids, so I raced back to the feed store to see if I could replace her before they woke up that morning.

When I arrived at the feed store they are completey wiped out of pullets. They only chicks they had left were sex links and white leghorns. I'm not happy about it, but decide to get the white leghorn, hoping the kids wont notice, lol. Leghorns tend to be flighty, so I'm just kind of less than thrilled but hope for the best.

The kids did not notice We name the girls. Sunny (light brahma) from my son who adores her. I name the E.E. Shae Shae, she is so sweet. I name the white leghorn Willow, who also turns out to be very sweet and calmer than expected.

Fast forward 4 weeks and Sunny, the brahma turns out to be very bossy and kind of a brat. Hmmm I have my suspisions that She is actually a He based on the way she/he is acting. I prepare my one son for this possibility, because we are not allowed to have roos and if it is, sadly he will have to be rehomed. You can imagine his reaction and sadness at this. I'm sad too. Even though she is a bit of a turd, I've grown attached too.

They are being brooded in a downstairs bathroom, yikes what a mess! Even though I'm pretty quick to clean up after them, there is about an inch of dust on everything. I figure I will just cal in a HazMat team once they are finally in their coop. At around this time they dont seem to need the heat lamp very much.

At 5 weeks the coop is ready for them, and they are feathering nicely. Still a little chilly in the evenings here in Northern Cali, so I aim to get them into their new coop at around 6 weeks if the weather isn't too cold at night. They are off the heat lamp totally and are in a temporary pen in the backyard during day time to graze on grass etc..

This past Monday I was watching them in their grazing pen and notice how happy Willow looked, lying in the sun. I decided that over the weekend they will be ready for the coop full time, as they will be over 6 weeks old then. Sadly, Willow is not just lounging in the sun, she can't get up very well and Sunny, the bossy brahma, is occasionally jumping on her head. I grab her out of the pen to check her over. She seems ok, but perhaps her one leg is injured. She is a bit wobbly. I bring her back to the brooder and decided that the two other gals will go in the coop a few days earlier, so Willow can heal.
They are all reall upset by this and much squawking and calling to each other goes on.

Sunny and ShaeShae are doing just fine in the new coop, I was pretty nervous about it. Willow on the other hand has gotten much worse and I am just beside myself. After one day alone and some special treatment she seemed ok. Last night she even jumped up on top of the brooder and was walking around occasionally, although she would lay down and rest often. This morning, however, she is bad. She seems paralized. She is eating and drinking fine, as long as she is close to it. Poop seems normal too. I have started her on poly vi sol (no iron) giving her some yogurt too. I'm really worried it may be Mareks or something but I'm hoping its just a vitamin deficiency or leg injuries from a high jump (she is a bit of a spazz normally)

I just dont know. I don't know how long to let it go on, how long it will take to heal if it is an injury or vitamin deficiency. I guess it's good I was able to separate right away if it is Mareks, still no garauntees the other two wont get it.

So here I am. Willow may die, or worse, I may have to cull her. Sunny may be a roo, ad if so, off he goes. Shae will be very lonely and that is no life for her, so I would try and get two more chicks. Not knowing what I'm dealing with in regards to Willow makes me very reluctant to possibly getting more chicks too.

I'm very sad. I was planning on having these very spoiled girls for a lot of years. I feel like a failure and that I failed them. Perhaps I'm not as knowlegable about chicken care as I think and I'm in over my head. Maybe my heart is too soft to own chickens, cause I am really struggling with this and all my decisions now.

If you actually read this far with me, thank you for listening, I feel a littel better having spewed this all out.
-Iri

 

[canesisters]

I sympathize with you. Of the 8 chicks I brought home, I lost 1 a week later, and after a long drawn-out battle to save another, I lost her too. I felt like I should've done more - or at least should've done something different. But if you do some more reading on here, you'll find that sometimes there are just too many things out of our control. I'm sure that you've done all that you can. Even the most experienced chicken raisers get caught with a roo unexpectedly.
Hope for the best - prepare for the worst. If it does turn out that you've got a single little pullet, maybe you could consider scanning the 'for sale' threads on here and finding a couple of 'confirmed' older girls to keep her company.

 

[Ben Rogers]

I understand how you feel. I lost my first 25 chicks to my dog at 3 weeks old.

I've had to cull two of my latest batch because of some birth defects.

I've also had to deal with some aggressive pecking behaviors that have left some of my chicks bloody and featherless in areas.

It's hard to know what's you and what's environment and what's chick idiosynchracies.

You seem very tender-hearted. You might need to build some walls to protect your heart. I'm very practical and look at my chickens as food producers (eggs and meat). Even so, I am very attached to them and the reality of "making the right decision" weighs heavily on me when I have to do it.

 

[zooweemama]

I'm so sorry. I am also new to chickens. I started with ducks and I learned right away to get more than you need. Worse case scenario- it would be easy to re-home extra ladies that we did not get attached to. Males can be re-homed or eaten (girls too but you can actually sell the extra pullets/females and get some money back). I would def separate the Willow from the group. If it's a virus and you can prevent the others from getting it- that's a good thing. But I'm a afraid I don't know what's wrong or anything. I felt the same way a few days ago. I had one of my 4 week olds gasping for air for like 3 days. Thinking I was going to have to cull him and some others. Turns out I found a piece of plastic practically glued to his tongue trailing back into his throat blocking his airways. I removed the plastic and he was fine. But I was a mess for 2 days. <3

 

[jrsckn]

Whoever said owning chickens was easy was wrong. Up until yesterday, I had beaten the odds. I got 54 chicks and every one of them made it; 18 are 17 weeks old in the coop, 26 5-week old meaties in their pens, and 10 7-week old pullets in the brooder. Yesterday I lost 7 meaties to heat stroke. An hour after my last check, I found they had piled on top of eachother and baked in the heat. Four were already dead, 3 more were too far gone for me to save. I feel like I let them down. I know **** happens but I was their caretaker and should've done better. No matter how much you read and how much you anticipate the worst, it still feels bad; we're human. We can only do our best and move on, good luck with your decision. Just remember, if you choose chickens, it'll be worth it in the end when you get yummy eggs to eat.

 

[wildriverswolf90]

I'm gonna say it… sometimes being a chicken lover/owner sucks! I did everything you said before I got my first girls, I read and studied and bought everything I might need ahead of time. I bought 8 orpingtons and within 3 day I had lost all but 2. So I bought 10 more, I got them to 8 weeks and then moved them into the coop, I forgot to latch the door and my dog killed 5. Then one day I finaly gave them supervised free range time, the were dust bathing and eating bugs and I was so happy to see them happy and the next second a hawk takes my smallest girl.
I got into chickens as a hobby a way to relive stress, but the truth is it can be stressful! But don't get discouraged, don't get dishearted, you WILL have a lot of wonderful days filled with, hens begging for treats, helping you garden, singing when they lay you an egg, sitting on your lap, lounging in the sun together and then more begging. Sunny might just be a bossy hen, my lily is commander of ALL things, that inculdes dogs, cats and roosters! Maybe check craigslist in your area.(just be sure to actually to go see how those birds are being kept and always do a qurantine period)

 

[ChickaBamBam]

Being upset is understandable but you should be giving yourself a HUGE pat on the back.

1- You researched A LOT. You even researched what kinds of chickens would be the best fit.
2- You had a coop ready and waiting
3- You had supplies and equipment ready and waiting
4- You have let your kids be exposed to that bittersweet combination of joy and loss that comes with having animals and pets.

Things happen and sometimes we feel powerless when we can't do anything about it.

And you know if you end up with just one hen for a little while, she is going to be very hand tamed because she will ask for constant attention. That itself could bring your kids a lot of enjoyment until later chicks are added.

You care a lot and are sincerely concerned about doing things right--it shows!

IMO you are a shining example of a new backyard flock owner. You were very prepared and should be proud of yourself. If you do give this another whorl you will still be prepared as in numbers 1-4 above but also you will have a bit more of an idea what to expect.

Personally, I think you're awesome and also think it would be great if more people took the time to make pre-chick preparations the way you did!​

 

[sumi]

I'm so sorry to hear about your troubles.

Sometimes chicken adventures go well and sometimes things are just terrible, but if you hang in there you'll have some really amazing times too.
About 3 years ago we decided to expand our little chicken hobby into a business and ordered 100 chicks. After getting messed around by the seller for nearly 2 months, we finally got our chicks, who turned out to be day olds, not 2 weeks old as we were told. We were unprepared at first, but we got most of them through the first night and then disaster strike. Our town started having power failures like we never saw before or since. In the middle of winter, we had no way to keep the chicks warm. Over the first week we lost 25 chicks and I nearly lost my mind on a daily basis. Then our "pullets" turned out to be straight run and we had quite a few roosters that needed to go. We ended up with only 42 chickens. But in spite of this I fell in love with my feathered friends, found and joined this website and though we had more bad and really horrible moments since our journey started we also had some magic with hatching chicks and some very special chickens.
I think it was worth it.

 

[Iridian]

Gosh, Ty everyone. I was really nervous about posting my vent, but I feel so much better about it. Canesisters, Ben and Zooeemoma thanks or sharing your stories, it has helped me to read them, even though I'm crying over them too!

Fingers still crossed that Sunny is just a bossy pullet and that Willow makes a freakishly, miraculous recovery

 

[Iridian]

After getting messed around by the seller for nearly 2 months, we finally got our chicks, who turned out to be day olds, not 2 weeks old as we were told. We were unprepared at first, but we got most of them through the first night and then disaster strike. Our town started having power failures like we never saw before or since. In the middle of winter, we had no way to keep the chicks warm. Over the first week we lost 25 chicks and I nearly lost my mind on a daily basis. Then our "pullets" turned out to be straight run and we had quite a few roosters that needed to go. We ended up with only 42 chickens.

Wow Sumi, that is just incredible and sad. I too love those feathered gals, and I"m hoping this is just a patch of bad luck. I'm very glad that after all that you feel it was worth the heartache. I'm sure I will be saying the same in the future.