Reptile Experts - Good first pet for a 12yo boy?

Prolly the best choice for a first timer is the Bearded Dragon.
They meat all your requirements except they will need a larger cage as they grow(about 18-24" max length)
As babies they eat some bugs, but lots of salad also, and as adults should only eat salad.
They have tons of personality, are usually very docile and take handling very well whether its everyday or 1x a month.
They grow fairly quickly if fed well, and the small fragile-looking babies soon turn into big robust and hardy adults.
The males do their head-bobing/throat flash displays which is alway interesting and entertaining.

Some special care requirements are: UV light, vit/mineral powder, and lots of natural sunlight.

Id stay away from most amphibians as a first pet, especially with chytrid fungus as a huge international concern right now(wont hurt you, but is wiping out both wild and captive amphibians at an alarming rate). Turtles/tortoises are also a very bad choice as they have very specialized needs as far as UV for proper shell/bone growth. Leopard geckos get boring real quick and most geckos are nocturnal so that limits interactiveness. I actually like the suggestion of the BTS, tho they are expensive and the cheaper ones are usually wild-caught and not the prettiest.

However, if he really wants a frog, the frogs known as "pacman frogs" make a pretty good 1st frog-pet.
They are usually voracious eaters, and grow quickly.
They require an insect/small mammal diet tho, and arent really for holding.
They are very sedentry, being ambush predators, so they dont jump and are not escapers.
They require a vit/mineral powder, 4" of MOIST cocofiber substrate to burrow in, and can live their entire lives in a 10g tank.
The males will sing for you, the females get bigger(there is no way to reliably tell them apart till they are mature).
They are a hardy frog, and come in many many colors, and a few species are available, the easiest and best choice being the cranwelli, the albino ones are amazing yellows and oranges and pinks.

I actually breed these frogs, here is a link to my reptile room and you can see some of them!
 
My little leopard gecko, Salvatoré, eats crickets and lives in a 10gal tank on my desk. I got him the Christmas I turned 11 and he is a wonderful pet.
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