My first fun post for today: PROLOGUE A short insight into the weird twists and turns my mind takes when left to its own devices. So there I was at 6:00 am, drinking my first cup of coffee and shining OldGal's shoes. (OldGal works for a security company, and apparently shined shoes are a necessity for driving a car and "observing and reporting" in a WalMart parking lot. ) That led to the time I spent in the military, remembering all the time that some fellows spent 'spit-shining' their shoes for inspection. (Not that I ever did. I discovered, much to my CO's displeasure, that the regulations only required "well shined" shoes.) The next thing in this mental expedition was the realization that this 'spit and polish' phenomena was not a new thing with the military. While I can find no verification, I'm willing to bet that Roman Legionnaires were required to keep their armor shined and, for all I know maybe even their sandals. Napoleon ordered the addition of non-functional buttons to the sleeves of uniforms to make it uncomfortable for his troops to wipe their nose on their sleeve. (A custom that is still with us today on men's suit jackets.) The British Army, in the 1700's required their troops to keep the white portions of the uniform white by a daily application of a fine, white clay. At this point my mind than took a hard left turn and I remembered a line from an old Arlo Guthrie anti-war ballad, Alice's Restaurant, to wit: "Sargent, ya gotta a lotta **** gall, asking me if I'm moral enough to kill women and children and burn their villages after bein' a litter bug." On to the poll.