Same! When my husband breaks the news that this favorite bird died or that favorite bird I have learned to not even be surprised anymore. One year, I raised a Marans hen that was better than any I ever owned. Big beautiful, glossy black hen with lovely copper hackles and perfect type. I paired her with her sire and when my husband came to me and told me my best hen was dead in the pen I thought he was joking. Yeah that one stung quite a bit. Made me physically ill.Show breeders have a whole philosophy about how to breed for the perfect blue but it's never worked out for me.
And yes that's how it works so I try to never go into winter being really excited about any in particular