that's IT!!! i never could quite figure out what they really reminded me of...
it's a zombie chicken!
it's a zombie chicken!
The Swedish HenHouse Sister-Wives of P. County
- Thread starter Bulldogma
- Start date
- Oct 15, 2012
- 51
- 18
- 101
You know, if you ever want to pull this together into an ebook, I would love to help you with the tech. 
- Thread starter
- #23
You know, if you ever want to pull this together into an ebook, I would love to help you with the tech.
It's a great compliment that you think this silliness is something anyone other than us "chicken people" would enjoy
I have a couple books out on Amazon - are you talking about that or something different? Inquiring minds want to know. 
- Thread starter
- #24
One evening, just as the sun was setting behind the rolling Virginia mountains, Inga looked up and froze in her tracks. One can only assume she was thinking, "Those are the biggest cats I've ever seen!" And they were! For a gate had been left open and the giant cats had come up into a pasture just behind the great red barn.
The chickens regarded the cats briefly, decided they smelled a bit funny (for we all know that chickens smell much better than giant cats) and then set on their way to the coop. Unlike giant cats, chickens always prefer to go to bed at the same time every night. It seemed the cats had no interest in going into a coop to perch, for they roamed on under the setting sun, chewing on grass and meooooing at each other. They were odd cats indeed! (I would say they were curious cats indeed, but that would seem a bit obvious, wouldn't it?)
In the morning the chickens awoke to find the Human-Things scurrying about busily, moving large objects about the yard. This was no great surprise to the chickens because everyone knows that Human-Things do strange things regularly... yet the sky was overcast and the winds were coming from the north instead of from the southwest as they usually did. The chickens found it rather unusual that the Human-Things and the winds were both behaving oddly. Gunnar ran out of the coop to have a talk with the wind about it's erratic behavior. As the wind was blowing briskly, he had to run to try to get ahead of it and speak to it's front. While it may sound silly to you, all chickens know that if a rooster can bid the sun come up, he can certainly pass wind!
Of course the chickens couldn't know that the silly Human-Things were just over-preparing for a storm that might or might not hit the place where the farm stood. Then again, humans have become over-reliant upon things like electricity and indoor plumbing, and they worry if there is a chance they may have to go without it. Silly humans! They have become so far removed from their instincts that they can't even grow enough feathers or fur on their bodies to keep themselves warm.
While the storm wouldn't be bad for a few days, the winds were certainly picking up in the most annoying way.
Coral and Lady Silvia were just walking along, minding their own business when...
Woosh! The wind picked up their feathers, making both prim and proper girls look like Marylin Monroe with her skirts blown up. How rude of the wind to expose their fluffy petticoats to the world at large. Gunnar was sure to have seen this ungraceful display of immodest feather malfunction!
To the Lavender Orpingtons' relief, it was Frida who witnessed the sight. But another shock was to come...
Frida called the flock in for a gathering to make an announcement...
Frida had turned into a cockerel!
(Insert dramatic music score here)
The news hit the flock like a shock-wave, and because few chickens surpass the sound barrier in flight, they were quite unused to shock waves!
Why on earth would any healthy pullet want to turn into a cockerel, they wondered? No rooster would ever know they joy of pushing an object larger than his own head out of his vent, and no rooster would ever know the sensation of being mounted by an amorous mate, feeling him latch on to one's head feathers with his beak and rip shoulder and back feathers out in passion. No rooster could know the feeling of strutting about half naked - a badge of being a "favorite hen." And no rooster would ever get to enjoy being dressed in a hen saver cape with some stupid Hello Kitty or Disney Princess design all over it. Or the feeling of become egg bound, or the desire to sit in the same exact place for 21 days with little food or water and only one chance to poop a day... and then have chicks use him as their personal jungle gym when they finally hatched.
Why on earth would Frida want to turn into a cockerel?
Well, some mysteries may never be solved, but I must tell you that Frida's transformation to Frederic came as a bit of a shock to the Human-Things also! Their silly little human plans were to have only one Swedish Flower rooster and five Swedish Flower hens. Now suddenly they had two roosters and only four hens. And if it came down to making a choice between the two roos, how ever could they choose between such friendly and personable boys. (Perhaps I should say "chickenable" boys, as roosters are not, technically "persons.")
How will the farm be affected by the storm, and will Frida decide to stay a cockerel or come back to her senses and face a world of hurt as a pullet... ahem... I mean the joys of being a pullet?
Tune in next time to The Swedish HenHouse Sister-Wives of P. County!
GUINEA!
The chickens regarded the cats briefly, decided they smelled a bit funny (for we all know that chickens smell much better than giant cats) and then set on their way to the coop. Unlike giant cats, chickens always prefer to go to bed at the same time every night. It seemed the cats had no interest in going into a coop to perch, for they roamed on under the setting sun, chewing on grass and meooooing at each other. They were odd cats indeed! (I would say they were curious cats indeed, but that would seem a bit obvious, wouldn't it?)
In the morning the chickens awoke to find the Human-Things scurrying about busily, moving large objects about the yard. This was no great surprise to the chickens because everyone knows that Human-Things do strange things regularly... yet the sky was overcast and the winds were coming from the north instead of from the southwest as they usually did. The chickens found it rather unusual that the Human-Things and the winds were both behaving oddly. Gunnar ran out of the coop to have a talk with the wind about it's erratic behavior. As the wind was blowing briskly, he had to run to try to get ahead of it and speak to it's front. While it may sound silly to you, all chickens know that if a rooster can bid the sun come up, he can certainly pass wind!
Of course the chickens couldn't know that the silly Human-Things were just over-preparing for a storm that might or might not hit the place where the farm stood. Then again, humans have become over-reliant upon things like electricity and indoor plumbing, and they worry if there is a chance they may have to go without it. Silly humans! They have become so far removed from their instincts that they can't even grow enough feathers or fur on their bodies to keep themselves warm.
While the storm wouldn't be bad for a few days, the winds were certainly picking up in the most annoying way.
Coral and Lady Silvia were just walking along, minding their own business when...
Woosh! The wind picked up their feathers, making both prim and proper girls look like Marylin Monroe with her skirts blown up. How rude of the wind to expose their fluffy petticoats to the world at large. Gunnar was sure to have seen this ungraceful display of immodest feather malfunction!
To the Lavender Orpingtons' relief, it was Frida who witnessed the sight. But another shock was to come...
Frida called the flock in for a gathering to make an announcement...
Frida had turned into a cockerel!
(Insert dramatic music score here)
The news hit the flock like a shock-wave, and because few chickens surpass the sound barrier in flight, they were quite unused to shock waves!
Why on earth would any healthy pullet want to turn into a cockerel, they wondered? No rooster would ever know they joy of pushing an object larger than his own head out of his vent, and no rooster would ever know the sensation of being mounted by an amorous mate, feeling him latch on to one's head feathers with his beak and rip shoulder and back feathers out in passion. No rooster could know the feeling of strutting about half naked - a badge of being a "favorite hen." And no rooster would ever get to enjoy being dressed in a hen saver cape with some stupid Hello Kitty or Disney Princess design all over it. Or the feeling of become egg bound, or the desire to sit in the same exact place for 21 days with little food or water and only one chance to poop a day... and then have chicks use him as their personal jungle gym when they finally hatched.
Why on earth would Frida want to turn into a cockerel?
Well, some mysteries may never be solved, but I must tell you that Frida's transformation to Frederic came as a bit of a shock to the Human-Things also! Their silly little human plans were to have only one Swedish Flower rooster and five Swedish Flower hens. Now suddenly they had two roosters and only four hens. And if it came down to making a choice between the two roos, how ever could they choose between such friendly and personable boys. (Perhaps I should say "chickenable" boys, as roosters are not, technically "persons.")
How will the farm be affected by the storm, and will Frida decide to stay a cockerel or come back to her senses and face a world of hurt as a pullet... ahem... I mean the joys of being a pullet?
Tune in next time to The Swedish HenHouse Sister-Wives of P. County!
GUINEA!
I love this, can't wait to read more.One evening, just as the sun was setting behind the rolling Virginia mountains, Inga looked up and froze in her tracks. One can only assume she was thinking, "Those are the biggest cats I've ever seen!" And they were! For a gate had been left open and the giant cats had come up into a pasture just behind the great red barn.
The chickens regarded the cats briefly, decided they smelled a bit funny (for we all know that chickens smell much better than giant cats) and then set on their way to the coop. Unlike giant cats, chickens always prefer to go to bed at the same time every night. It seemed the cats had no interest in going into a coop to perch, for they roamed on under the setting sun, chewing on grass and meooooing at each other. They were odd cats indeed! (I would say they were curious cats indeed, but that would seem a bit obvious, wouldn't it?)
In the morning the chickens awoke to find the Human-Things scurrying about busily, moving large objects about the yard. This was no great surprise to the chickens because everyone knows that Human-Things do strange things regularly... yet the sky was overcast and the winds were coming from the north instead of from the southwest as they usually did. The chickens found it rather unusual that the Human-Things and the winds were both behaving oddly. Gunnar ran out of the coop to have a talk with the wind about it's erratic behavior. As the wind was blowing briskly, he had to run to try to get ahead of it and speak to it's front. While it may sound silly to you, all chickens know that if a rooster can bid the sun come up, he can certainly pass wind!
Of course the chickens couldn't know that the silly Human-Things were just over-preparing for a storm that might or might not hit the place where the farm stood. Then again, humans have become over-reliant upon things like electricity and indoor plumbing, and they worry if there is a chance they may have to go without it. Silly humans! They have become so far removed from their instincts that they can't even grow enough feathers or fur on their bodies to keep themselves warm.
While the storm wouldn't be bad for a few days, the winds were certainly picking up in the most annoying way.
Coral and Lady Silvia were just walking along, minding their own business when...
Woosh! The wind picked up their feathers, making both prim and proper girls look like Marylin Monroe with her skirts blown up. How rude of the wind to expose their fluffy petticoats to the world at large. Gunnar was sure to have seen this ungraceful display of immodest feather malfunction!
To the Lavender Orpingtons' relief, it was Frida who witnessed the sight. But another shock was to come...
Frida called the flock in for a gathering to make an announcement...
Frida had turned into a cockerel!
(Insert dramatic music score here)
The news hit the flock like a shock-wave, and because few chickens surpass the sound barrier in flight, they were quite unused to shock waves!
Why on earth would any healthy pullet want to turn into a cockerel, they wondered? No rooster would ever know they joy of pushing an object larger than his own head out of his vent, and no rooster would ever know the sensation of being mounted by an amorous mate, feeling him latch on to one's head feathers with his beak and rip shoulder and back feathers out in passion. No rooster could know the feeling of strutting about half naked - a badge of being a "favorite hen." And no rooster would ever get to enjoy being dressed in a hen saver cape with some stupid Hello Kitty or Disney Princess design all over it. Or the feeling of become egg bound, or the desire to sit in the same exact place for 21 days with little food or water and only one chance to poop a day... and then have chicks use him as their personal jungle gym when they finally hatched.
Why on earth would Frida want to turn into a cockerel?
Well, some mysteries may never be solved, but I must tell you that Frida's transformation to Frederic came as a bit of a shock to the Human-Things also! Their silly little human plans were to have only one Swedish Flower rooster and five Swedish Flower hens. Now suddenly they had two roosters and only four hens. And if it came down to making a choice between the two roos, how ever could they choose between such friendly and personable boys. (Perhaps I should say "chickenable" boys, as roosters are not, technically "persons.")
How will the farm be affected by the storm, and will Frida decide to stay a cockerel or come back to her senses and face a world of hurt as a pullet... ahem... I mean the joys of being a pullet?
Tune in next time to The Swedish HenHouse Sister-Wives of P. County!
GUINEA!
- Oct 15, 2012
- 51
- 18
- 101
Oh, I meant as an ebook on Amazon. You're a great writer, and it would be fun to pull together all the posts in one place once he chicks have all grown up.
- Thread starter
- #27
Oh, I meant as an ebook on Amazon. You're a great writer, and it would be fun to pull together all the posts in one place once he chicks have all grown up.
Thank you very much! You made my day calling me a "great writer"
I'm currently an out-of-work journalist with 2 special needs kids (autism & Down syndrome). Obviously I posses GREAT genetics - LOL! I have one book in print - The Littlest Sister, and one eBook (humor... but I'm actually in the process of reworking it in all my free time (free time... LOL) calledDisaster Flambé - don't read it... you'll think I'm crazy. But then again, you might laugh. It has no chickens in it
But... at some point I may hit you up for some assistance... It'll just depend if it turns into anything worth reading.
i found them yesterday, but due to lack of funding they'll have to wait...
(short term disability *&^%$# up = no pay since sept 27, none due till november 2nd.)
and as for 'worth reading' yeah i think there's hope for a book like this one (swedish henhouse sisters). and not just for 'chicken people' but all ages.
(short term disability *&^%$# up = no pay since sept 27, none due till november 2nd.)
and as for 'worth reading' yeah i think there's hope for a book like this one (swedish henhouse sisters). and not just for 'chicken people' but all ages.
- Oct 15, 2012
- 51
- 18
- 101
Always glad to make a day! And now I'm totally going to read Disaster Flambé - with a title like that, how could I not?
I grew up in journalism, so while it's not how I make my income, I do a lot of writing, the occasional editing gig, and like playing around with digital pub technology. I've also got a back burner idea for an indie press where all authors write their first drafts in public, and this would obviously fit the bill!
And now I'm totally going to read Disaster Flambé - with a title like that, how could I not?I grew up in journalism, so while it's not how I make my income, I do a lot of writing, the occasional editing gig, and like playing around with digital pub technology. I've also got a back burner idea for an indie press where all authors write their first drafts in public, and this would obviously fit the bill!
- Thread starter
- #30
OK - that's too cool! Great idea!!
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