Things men do.....

Well.....this same guy I ask to sand the raw edges on a support panel & he starts sanding the finished edge
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Well, I've heard of people being sent to get 50 ft of flight line.

I was also told about a female who was sent hither and yon looking for some falopian tube.

Ummm...prop wash

keys to the jet (not as funny as some, since some aircraft DO have keys).
 
As sad as that is, I worked with a company out of NJ that did handling systems in warehouses. We had a new guy come to work one day and when he was asked to cut some pipe so-and-so long, we found out that he couldn't read a tape measure. Not only that, he did bring a tape, but it was some oddball automatic tape measure that pushed the tape out and retracted it.

The guy was the epitome of sorriness. We put him to cleaning up scrap that was laying around. He would get 2 pieces of short, galvanized pipe at a time and drag them by one end. Anyone could easily carry five pieces in one arm.

And no, the boy had nothing wrong with him other than being spoiled as he was growing up. THIS is why people shouldn't spoil their kids. It's funny to some people, but when you have to take up slack for people like this, it's a whole other story.
 
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I was in the Navy for a while and we did that to people. Another squadron had a guy sent to our squadron looking for prop wash. At the time, I was still pretty new and had no idea what he was talking about. So I sent him away with a 5 gallon bucket of the soap we used to wash our planes with. I guess the joke was on both of us.

Just in case no one knows.... The flight line is where the planes taxi and are parked. Prop wash is the wind that comes off the propellers when the engines are running.

I probably sent a guy or two looking for both.
 
I am a building contractor and along the way I have run into my share of guys who can't read a tape. Once I found that out, I needed to have a little fun

Example:

Me: Hey nitwit, I need you to cut a 2x4 cut 15 and 16/16ths long.

Nitwit: How long (pulling out tape)?

Me: 15 and 16/16ths.

Nitwit: (again) how long?

Me: 15 and 16/16ths

Nitwit: (stretching out tape and visibly counting the lines) 16/16ths?

Me: Yep, need it right away

Nitwit: (still trying to count lines) Okay boss, coming right up (still counting lines)

Me: Got that cut yet?

Nitwit: Hey.....my tape don't go that high

Me: Sure it does, it is 16/16th less than 17 inches

Nitwit: Well my tape is differnt than yours.

Me:
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you nitwit, it is 16 inches.
 
Let's not forget always wishing you had a sky hook... A hook in the sky that will hold anything, anywhere, for however long you need it there. Drives people bananas when they think they've found one, only to be told, nope that's not it.
 
When I worked for a corporate flight department once, our aircraft cleaner was a horrible slacker. The flight engineer purposely put a grape under one of the cockpit seats to see how long it would take the cleaner to find it. Last we checked, it was a California raisin.
 
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I just proof read an architecture catalog that had articles from their European office it had measurements like 6/8 & 12/16 (the local office had converted from metric I think) can anyone say 3/4th?
 

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