upsetting event when butchering today warning involves talk of slaugh

Seconding, or thirding, Fred's Hens suggestion. Be sure your hatchet is really sharp, and that you have a way of holding the bird securely, AND that you strike against something good and solid, like a hard stump (not soft ground or gravel!) - that means of dispatching your bird is the surest thing and surely easiest for your hens. Learned the hard way, sorry to say, after several alternate - and often promoted - methods.
 
I'm so sorry you had to go through that! You are braver than me. I have come to the conclusion that I will never eat my birds. I just don't have it in me to kill them.
You made a mistake, you will learn from it whether you choose to process more birds or not. Your reaction is perfectly normal. I always worry when I hear someone say they enjoy the "kill". I am also glad to hear someone else say they respect the animals that provide them with food. I have stressed that with my children as well. I believe in giving them the most comfortable or natural life possible in return for their gift to us.
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That is my 2 cents.
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I am going to try using a killing cone and then cutting the head off with PVC cutters or something. Makes it easier to hold them still once their head's off
 
Ickey stuff happens to us all , it effects us for awhile and then we get over it and move on with our business .
When the time comes get on that horse and ride him , now that you know what to do ...... life is waiting on you ......
 
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Same thing happened to me about a month ago. Only I had planned to process 2 roos. The first one, I cut and although he bled it didn't cut deep enough. Found out with that experience, you need a VERY sharp knife (typing this I think I will check out a knife store maybe, I've always thought those were where serial killers shopped lol).
Anyways, this 1st roo, as I was looking around for a sharper alternative, he jumped out of the makeshift killing cone (note to self: always wrap the legs together) and needless to say was trying to hide from me all over the yard. Finally got him back in and finished the deed with a tree branch pruner. I felt real bad that I wasn't able to end his life quickly, as I had planned. It was so draining, that I didn't want to process the 2nd roo that day. He's still alive, and if the day ever comes for him to go (which it may), I'll find it very hard to do, because he's my little buddy, always follows me around the yard. That was my first and so far only time processing a chicken.
 
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It's ok to feel pretty unhappy and upset, and it also is ok to discard a bird that you are iffy about it's insides. Most of us don't process our chickens as a last resort of food, and no one should have to feel bad for disposing of an animal that might not be up to par for the table. Always better safe than sorry.

As for the dispatching, well, I think all of us here who've done a few birds or more have had a botched kill. It royally sucks, and for me, if it's a chicken or a deer, it's enough to put me in a vile mood for days, even weeks. I'm pretty much not a good person to be near if I screw up on ending a food animal's life in a humane way.

The only way to get better is to practice, and that doesn't have to mean chopping of chicken heads right and left. Practice keeping your knives super sharp, and practice making precise and even cuts on the veggies you cook. If you want to use pruners or nippers to cut off the head, practice pruning the trees and shrubs around the area. Plan to use a hatchet, practice using a hatchet on sticks and other random, non living things.

But again,
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Awww. I'm sorry that happened. When I was little, we had a small farm. My mom decided to breed rabbits and she culled the extras for meat. My mom was raised a city girl and had no first hand knowledge of slaughtering. She went by suggestions from other farmers and lets just say it wasn't pretty. She is quite the softy and hitting a rabbit in the head with a hammer to stun it only to have it not work and try it again almost made her give up. But she got through it. She found a way that worked for her but she did beat herself up for quite a while about the practice bunnies. It's okay to feel bad, like others have said, we'd be worried if you didn't.
 
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I'm sorry for you in all this. The important thing is that you learned from the experience, important & valuable lessons that will make the next session go much better for both you & your birds. I tried several different dispatch methods before I found the way that works best for me. There were times when the bird didn't Cross The Road as quickly as I would like for them, but overall I still feel reassured that they had more considerate handling than most birds in commercial processing places.

I know it was upsetting, but did you take photos of the insides of that bird you buried? I've never had one that looked like that, I'm interested to find out what that was. It's good you at least put it where it can nourish the growth of a plant, I don't think it's wasted in that way.

I hope that you & your Mom can enjoy the meals you make from that one finished chicken, and that your next session goes easier for you.
 
Very sorry about your bad experience.
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It is good to see that you respect the animals. You have my respect in that regard. (IN MY OPINION) I believe the people who dont respect the animals are the ones who would prefer someone else kills them. Think of the alternative. Would you rather the animal be alone and killed by a machine?

It might sound a little crazy but, I always say a small prayer afterwards. It seems to help me come to terms with it all, and puts things in perspective. Take it as a good time to reflect about life and death. Its not good to ignore it and hold it all inside. If you need to cry, go ahead and cry. The animal never goes to waste entirely. Whether its feeding the plants or feeding you, that is just the circle of life.

One thing I have learned when killing animals for food is be quick and decisive. When you are nervous about it or squimish it usually results in prolonged suffering of the animal. Your skill at doing it determines how humane it is, not exactly the tool. I personally prefer to do it the axe and stump way. However, I have been in survival situations where I have killed animals with my hands, which at times can be much more humane and quicker than a knife.

And to the person who said, "being a vegetarian is more healthy". Thats not entirely true...Everything in moderation my friend, balance is the key.
 
We found the best way for us is to remove the head. It's quick and sure. My husband has an old buck knife and just cuts right through the neck.
 

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