Venting about neighbor

[cassie]

You aren't going to make her happy. That's a fact. Trying to appease her is also a mistake. You will have better luck if you hold your ground. You got a hint of that when you confronted her directly. You don't have to be hostile. Just firm.

 

[chic-a-deee]

I live in public housing so my neighbours are horrendous. BUT they cant say much about my chickens becos the animal welfare has been called on most of them. One time for a dog being attacked for 6 months....then finally killed. Another...had chickens & their dog got in & killed them. Another...dog kills cat in dog owners yard...dog owner didnt care & said cat shouldnt be in their yard..stood their & watched it being killed (I kid u not), Another....had a horse in the front yard of tiny townhouse, had rabbits, guinea pigs & a husky. Husky attacks & kills cat in front yard....everyone screaming & carrying on...kids screaming (not mine they are always inside) neighbours call animal welfare RSPCA...they had to get rid of husky. Thing is...when most of these ppl have animals killed or taken, they get more. They dont get them desexed (so one dog has litter after litter) they dont train them, they dont include them in the family, they are left outside 24/7 & go feral ...its heartbreaking. We keep our rooster in the garage till 9am....thats humane enuf to wake ppl up I figure.
Weve had mouse problems....neighbours too, but Ive talked to the lady on one side & said I was doing something about it (5 dead mice already).

So, I just keep to myself & dont let my kids out the front at all cos thats all the ppl around here do, drink, dont work & hang out the front of their houses, until they attract the attention of one of the neighbours who then goes over & blabs on about BS all day. Go & get a job for gawwds sake!!! LOL The mentality is mind blowing!!!

Anyway, glad u could talk to ur neighbour. She was probably a bully at school & hasnt grown up one bit.

You just keep on being a good person & dont worry why she doesnt do stuff. KEEP as FAR AWAY from her property as you can with everything. I would point the chook run in the other direction. Anyway....just know that you are OK...let her live in her own life of misery, shes made it.

 

[Farmettehopeful]

I'm sorry to hear that so many others have to put up with people like this too, it makes me want to

sometimes...or I have visions of doing that to her hehe It upsets me so much sometimes, especially now that I am a stay at home...this summer is going to be rough! We put the trees in for some backyard privacy once the grass comes in (we filled our backyard with dirt to get it level), and put up lattice on the side of the deck that faces their yard, built planters for underneath so I can grow morning glories to block their view (because we were tired of being stared at all of the time!). It's hard to explain but our houses sit "close". Ours is practically centered on our property. Theirs is closer to ours and they have 3 times as much yard ON THE OTHER SIDE but they insist on being on the smallest strip of land just to annoy me...atleast that's what it feels like now lol!
Chicadee-we moved from a situation just like yours to come here! We had beer cans on our porch, fireworks land on our roof, and I couldn't take it anymore when I caught a neighbor walking across our patio to get to another neighbors house...I was working out and we had a big window that looked out onto the patio and backyard. He didn't just walk through the yard...he walked our patio, right past the window! I guess maybe I am spoiled because I grew up in a place that I could stand outside naked and the only thing I had to worry about were the med helicopters flying over and maybe our chickens or wild turkeys, deer, bear and whatever other animal was around! BTW the house I grew up in is only 2 minutes away, across the valley so imagine my shock to move back to my hometown and have to deal with them...I should tell her that techincally I was here first since I grew up in this town lol!

 

[Farmettehopeful]

Thank you all for letting me vent. I hope I don't seem rude when I say that I enjoyed hearing others stories of rough neighbors, it feels good not being alone! I love BYC

 

[chic-a-deee]

Oh no..Farmettehopeful..I understand. Its good here on BYC...I cant vent on Face Book cos some of my friends know ppl that live in this housing complex. Im from interstate so didnt know this was the armpit of the universe. Im a single mum with 3 lovely girls trying to raise them the right way & on my own for almost 7yrs now. Yes, we had the fireworx thing the 1st year we moved here!!! The neighbour started letting off fireworks at 3PM!!!! non stop till about 1am.....I nearly killed him.
Next year wasnt too bad. He had about 3 parties during that first 2yrs. I made it known I wasnt impressed. Went down to say HEY, my kids are trying to sleep, if u have no respect for ur own (5) kids, at least have respect for mine. He just retorted in a very childish manner. Grrr Hey, but no more parties since!! LOL

Ive often thought of moving. But the private rents here are phenomenal... its the only thing that keeps me here. Plus the thought of getting all my **it together all by myself, is very daunting. My garage is chokker block full of rubbish. AND then theres the chook pen!!! How on earth am I gona move that??? The main part of it can be moved easy enuf......but its the makeshift run thats the problem. Ive just whipped that up with a few garden stakes....tall plastic/metal ones & put wire fencing all over it. That will be hard to uproot & shift. All my family are in another state. Parents too old. Brother has bad back problems....need I go on? lol. You see...you dont waste ur time & energy on your neighbours shortcomings. The less time you spend on that, then the more energy u can spend on ur family. In a manner of speaking....ur neighbour is effecting & controlling ur life without even saying much at all?? !! I have realised myself that I dont have to worry or fret about what they are doing....like I said, they are wallowing in their own misery they have caused themselves. It will come back & bite them on the *** soon enuf. It may take time....but it will happen. And always with ppl like this, their kids are worse. Its terrible. They put a dead octopus in my letterbox one day. My reaction was what a pathetic sad waste of life. Poor octopus. I hadnt done anything. Its just because I wasnt participating in the usual neighbourhood living in each others pockets....syndrome!!! It was 6am...before any of them got up so I scraped it off my letterbox cos it was suctioned on.....& put it in my bin. Can you imagine what that did for the pranksters NOT to see their great prank come off? I said & did nothing. Kept going on with life. They expected me to be screaming in horror (hey Im 6ft tall...I dont scream at much)
So much more.....eg: 6am one morning some lunatic is in my front yard with a hammer & metal file....smashing in my car window. Oh...he thought it was HIS car...

u heard rite....his car

I raced down stairs, threw open the door & looked him level eyed right in the eye!!! (he must've been my height)
He was young, & drunk...(could smell it) but I WAS VERY CALM... said do I look like someone who would steal a car??? Lucky my kids were at their dads.
I said hed been drinking & this is what happens when ur drunk. He ended up giving me his name & address hahahahaha. I called the police when the guy left & their jaws nearly hit the ground when they said, "do you know him?" ME: "No, but he gave his name & address" Stunned policeman says "why did he do that?" I said..."cos I asked him" Hahahahaha They were all on top alert cos this guy was armed. I didnt even think about that when I raced down stairs & top marks for all the loser heroes that didnt come to help....all gutless wonders. So now...NOBODY bothers me at all. They all think Im miss tough hard *** girl....hahahaha but Im not. Im into peace & non violence & respect for all living beings....but shhhhh dont let them know that.

 

[jreynolds]

Wow, I love your attitude chic-a-deee!!! Sometimes you just have to stand up for yourself and for what is right! Keep up the good work

 

[Kikiriki]

Go to the dollar store or salvation army and get a pretty little basket: when your chickens start laying make a nest of some leaves and flowers, add six eggs and deliver it to her. It will shock her. It will show her that home grown eggs are delicious. It will either soften her up or make her feel like the itchy B she has been acting...

 

[Aeropennchick]

We had trouble with our neighbors when we first moved in, and the nearest house is almost three acres away. I think you are on the right track, Farmettehopeful, to understand that your neighbor is overly hostile because of jealousy. It is sad, really, that she is so unhappy with her situation that she is focusing her energy negatively on your guys. You mentioned her kids - I wonder if they are also suffering from such a negative environment.

She may never come around, unless she is able to deal with her own demons. But you are the better person, hands down, for trying to have that conversation with her and trying to get some understanding. No need to waste your energy stressing about what they think of you. Just let her tirades roll off your back and think to yourself, Wow that's sad. Be honest and cordial. And good luck.

Our neighbors were angry that our property was willed to us, as they own a big apple orchard to the side of us and were hoping to add this land to theirs. They complained about everything for the first year - I'm a night shift nurse and they gossiped about me driving in and out at odd hours, they complained about our dogs barking (from several acres away, and ours are definitely not the only dogs you can hear barking!), about our lawn, which is more of a meadow really, not being mowed, among other things. So I told them about my job, started putting the dogs in at night, and stuff like that. Man, I used to dread coming home in the morning and seeing that guy driving his tractor up the street to meet me, after working all night, because I knew he was coming up just to complain about something before I had even finished getting out of my car! But you see, they were upset they didn't get the land, and were suspicious that we were irresponsible young 'uns who weren't going to use what we got.

Finally after more than a year, the complaints stopped, and we now wave hello to each other. I'm going to invite them over to see my chickens before the roosters start crowing, that's for sure!! But my suspicion is, they will be showing up a lot more often - for eggs and a handshake.

 

[flux]

Girl, vent away! There are a lot of people in this world who are super self-serving and will do any little vindictive thing to just get an ounce of satisfaction. I have a neighbor who lets their dog run, and it's very territorial, barking at me on my property. I was polite, chasing the thing back and letting them know how much I'd appreciate it if they kept it on their property. They seemed to get the message, saying the dog was used to running because my property sat uninhabited for a bit. Then, after I was back in my yard, they retaliated the way they REALLY meant to: by yelling "terrorist" and "go back to your country" while firing their guns into the woods. Makes it even harder to sort out my anger issues living close to people like that! But sometimes you just gotta sit a fight out and know someway, they will eventually get theirs. Perhaps by a dog not coming home to their kids.


And chic-a-deee, you're my hero!! If only I had such grace dealing with this stuff.

 

[chic-a-deee]

All great advice....re giving the neighbour fresh eggs. (she probly has never had anything nice done for her?)
Ive found & expert advice says best way to deter dogs is a squirt of water....preferably in the nose. So if it barks at u on ur property or fenceline, turn the hose on it. Its 100% harmless & 100% effective.

Off to pick the kids up from school now. Hope u all have a great day.....xxo