Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?

Discussion in 'Games, Jokes, and Fun!' started by MrsChickendad, Jul 22, 2008.

  1. MrsChickendad

    MrsChickendad Chillin' With My Peeps

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    Jun 18, 2008
    Lennon, Michigan
    No matter what your political bent:

    Why did the chicken cross the road?

    BARACK OBAMA: The chicken crossed the road because it was time for a
    CHANGE! The chicken wanted CHANGE!

    JOHN MC CAIN: My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he
    recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the
    chickens on the other side of the road.

    HILLARY CLINTON: When I was First Lady, I personally helped that
    little chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely
    qualified to ensure -- right from Day One!--that every chicken in this
    country gets the chance it deserves to cross the road. But then, this
    really isn't about me.......

    DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize
    that he must first deal with the problem on 'THIS' side of the road
    before it goes after the problem on the 'OTHER SIDE' of the road. What
    we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking
    on his 'CURRENT' problems before adding 'NEW' problems.

    OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which
    is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the
    chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of
    life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the
    rest of the chickens.

    GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road.
    We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or
    not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle
    ground here.

    COLIN POWELL: Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the
    satellite image of the chicken crossing the road...

    ANDERSON COOPER - CNN: We have reason to believe there is a chicken,
    but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of
    the road.

    JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am
    now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about
    the chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against
    it.

    NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he's GUILTY! You
    can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.

    PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.

    MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs
    when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any
    insider information.

    DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad?
    Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been
    told.

    ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain. Alone.

    GRANDPA: In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road.
    Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good
    enough.

    BARBARA WALTERS: Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be
    listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming
    story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to
    accomplish its life long dream of crossing the road.

    ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

    JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads
    together, in peace.

    BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken2007, which will not only
    cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and
    balance your check book. Internet Explorer is an integral part of the
    Chicken. This new platform is much more stable and will never cra...*&*&^!!
    .........reboot.

    ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the
    road move beneath the chicken?

    BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What is your
    definition of chicken?

    AL GORE: I invented the chicken!

    COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?

    DICK CHENEY: Where's my gun?

    AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens.
     
  2. candrnyen

    candrnyen Out Of The Brooder

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    Jun 26, 2008
    Michigan
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  3. farmgirlie1031

    farmgirlie1031 Chillin' With My Peeps

    Apr 26, 2008
    IA
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  4. Daycare Mom

    Daycare Mom Chickens, Cuddly and Delicious

    Apr 9, 2008
    Conklin, Michigan
    Dr. Suess is my favorite one![​IMG]
     
  5. BeckyLa

    BeckyLa Chillin' With My Peeps

    Jan 11, 2007
    N. Louisiana
    This chicken is now crossing many roads on the internet highway as I send this hilarious email all over the country. [​IMG]
     
  6. ji

    ji Out Of The Brooder

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    Feb 26, 2008
    Henry David Thoreau : The chicken crossed the road to get a away from the pond. Chickens don't like ponds, if they do we call them 'ducks'.

    Neal Young: I've seen the chicken and the damage done... a little chicken found in everyyy one ... ooooohhhh the chickens done.

    Michael Jackson: A lot of people cross the road to get away from NeverNever Land. It doesn't mean anything, I'm not guilty... will the chicken accept a settlement of 50 million to agree to that ?

    VP Cheney: I told the chicken I was going to do a little deer hunting on this side of the road and then he up and run off with his head down.

    Jerry Seinfeld: What is it with chickens these days? You ever notice how they don't walk along roads or take taxies or hitch hike they always CROSS the road. What the hell are chickens trying to tell us about roads? I don't get it.

    Sigmund Freud: The road is symbol of travel - travel by road. Most chickens travel by road to a slaughter house or in a freezer truck headed for a grocery store. In trying to cross roads many chickens do not make it.
    Roads have not been especially good to chickens. Its best just to cross the road to get away from your mother and get on with your life.
     
  7. chickenlover98

    chickenlover98 Chillin' With My Peeps

    Jul 21, 2008
    Hogwarts
    Donald Trump- The chicken crossed the road because he got fired because I told him, "You're Fired, Chicken."
     
  8. ChickenGirl95

    ChickenGirl95 Chillin' With My Peeps

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    May 31, 2008
    New York
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    Last edited: Jul 23, 2008

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