This is just my own personal opinion. I would have a informal type bar be que hootny nanny affair. I would have it at your place and have your friends and guests dress informal and provide a good mouth watering picnic type buffet. Have a good band to provide some good music and etc. I wouldn't ask my guests for gifts or money as this is your 2nd marraige and since you have been living together you probably have alot of the basics. I wish you much happiness for your wedding and congrats all around!