found this rough thing in the bottom of one of my mass mess google docs
apparently Connor was supposed to die in a completely different way
Bleddyn’s heart lodged in her throat as the truck squealed, then callously roared on.
Her legs were senseless and rubbery as she ran, threatening to collapse her and never work again.
But, somehow, she made it.
The truck’s diehard pursuer lay motionless on the smoking pavement. Bleddyn’s faltering legs gave out just as she reached him, but her arms took over and gathered the frozen wolf to her. His head, with eyes slitted just short of being shut, limply lolled away from her grasp. A thin trickle of blood wormed its way from his muzzle as she tilted his head back onto her lap. “Dad. Dad. Dad, get up. We’ve got to go. Dad. Gotta go. Please. We’ve gotta get them.” Her voice cracked to a shattering pitch as her hands spasmodically ran along his flank. Move, move, move, move, move. “Dad. Daddy.” Her voice had lost all of its usual rasp now; for the first time, her voice was pretty, and it was horrifying. She crumpled over him, pressing her face against his, as though she could get him to hear her by projecting her voice directly into his ear. “Why aren’t you getting up?”
With his upper body still possessively cradled in her trembling arms, she whirled around with a dangerously pale face. In this moment, despite the hardening cuts and scars, she seemed impossibly fragile, the youngest of them all.
“Someone help him. Someone help him. Please.”
“None of you told me.”
Ash faced them all like a predator evaluating their defense for the weakest link.
“River, you lied to me and told me my daughter was fine when she’d just been stabbed and abducted. You couldn’t have even been sure she was alive.”
She paced forward until she stood before her best friend. River was clearly trying to muster a antithetical response, but the tears leaking from her eyes cancelled out any defense she could’ve lied up.
Ash stepped back like she was giving River a break, but she just whirled on her next victim- Mikki, whose eyes were noticeably darkening. Usually, Ash knew to stand clear when green went black. But not today. “Do you know what you could’ve prevented?” She spun and ended up right in front of Samantha. The pity that the shorter woman looked up at her with lit a fresh flame of rage in Ash’s bruised heart. “Do you know?” She backed away from them, but her arms stretched wide to encompass them all in her reckoning tirade. The truth was always inescapable. “Blame these sick people, blame their weapons, blame fate, blame God, but you know as freaking well as I do that you’ll be misplacing that blame. Look at Tayn now. Look at your brother, River. All of you. Look, I demand you look. Look at her, look at me, look anywhere that makes you uncomfortable because you know I’m right. They didn’t have to go.”
Bleddyn choked out a protest from where she stood and reached out for her mother’s heaving shoulder. “…Mom, wait—“
Ash whirled around, face a horrific mask of so many emotions it was impossible to pin just one. “Was this a joke to you, too, Bleddyn?”
Bleddyn flinched and began backing up, shaking her head and hands. “…what, no, n-no, Mom.”
Ash followed her retreating daughter, her head dangerously low on her shoulders. “Certainly seems it was. It doesn’t seem you took anything seriously enough. If you’d only come home when you could’ve…”
Bleddyn couldn’t escape those eyes. Because those eyes were nothing short of dead. “M-mom, please.”
“Did you think? Oh, ha, that’s a laugh that I even bother asking, because, no, you never think anything through. You never thought when you pulled those insane stunts and had us worried for your life, time after time, oh, time after time. You never thought and you. never. will.”
“Shut up, Bleddyn, JUST SHUT UP.” Before Bleddyn could react to her mother’s screams, Ash’s palm had shot out and smacked her clear across the face.
Bleddyn, having been caught completely off guard by her mother’s blow, sprawled on her back a couple feet away from where she’d been standing.
Bleddyn’s voice was nothing more than a tremulous whisper as she twitched meekly, staying where she’d landed.
Ash barked a sick laugh and her voice came out so thick that her next words could’ve passed for an animal’s.
“No, Bleddyn, no.
My nieces no longer have parents.
My sister’s dead.
It’s not okay.”
I had just moved on