16 years together but....

[SillyChicken]

The duration of your relationship should not have any bearing on staying. You're just used to it and doing something on your own is a scary change... but it will be a positive one! I had said what I dealt with with my current DH, this was just 3 yrs ago.....It doesn't matter if you been together 2 months or 20 years. Find your inner strength. Do not let anything he says bother you (it'll drive him mad if he cannot hurt you or control you and your buttons anymore and he loses his power over you).

Good luck with finding a job!! (Don't be afraid to apply for something more than you think you can do)

Besides if he's so much better and smarter and makes so much more money than you.... he can afford to pay child support.

You can also try Monster.com and other employment search engines - try temporary services like manpower, etc. They'll help you find work and you can gain a variety of experiences.

 

[Cknldy]

Remember the appalachian region folks...I can literally drive over a mtn and be in wrong turn territory! Lol I love it here but I hear the same sentiments- it's soo hard for a woman to get a job here in mining country. I felt sort of bad (but not a whole lot) when I stopped in at the convenience store today. Younger than me lady went to counter in front of me and asked about a resume she had put in yesterday. I've already asked there but the cashier told young lady the 2 other locations are about to start hiring for full time and for her to get on over there. So sorry, I made my purchase and drove right on over there! Lmao Remember that cashier experience I hold disdain for?? I didn't see the young lady's car there so.... In other news the children and I visited with the hopefully soon to be babysitter today. Kids loved it since they knew each other from school and 'Mom' and I hit it off from the get go. Also got a call to collect hatching eggs for a local guy. Yay! I am so nervous about it though cuz he asked me to collect for next ten days on approximation of what my girls have been laying. I made sure he realized that after 7 days the hatchability rate starts to go down so I've been asked to keep them turned until pick up. Okey dokey. All thumbs up so far today. Happy cluckin....

 

[Cknldy]

I'm networking, I'm networking. Keep telling myself that. Kids told daddy about how much fun they had today and he asked why we went there. So I could meet the woman that will be babysitting. ' someone else to harass' he says. How bad did I let this get over the years? I'm starting to think I didn't have people aversion disorder as bad as I had dh disorder. Isolation?? Maybe not me after all. Oooh, won't let it bother me. Yep, another evening of marital bliss. I don't know what else to say except that the next few weeks are not going to be good. Sigh...happy cluckin.

 

[DDNONIN2016]

Hang in there young lady. Your are doing a fantastic job. I was in the same type situation (altho not married and no kids) but I got out and vow to never be controlled again. No one deserves to be treated like this. I am praying for you.

 

[Cknldy]

I knew there would be some sort of argument when tax refund comes! I have asked for nothing (even though I was secretly hoping for an incubator) from that money. He planned to pay off a loan and still plans to do so. The thing is that after paying property taxes too there isn't going to be much left. As I just found out he had plans for truck stuff and is worried about if he gets laid off in the future. But truck stuff still comes first to him. I do realize that HE has worked all year and deserves something from the return since it is his. So instead of arguing I just gave him the property tax info and said for him to pay whatever. I am sooo over this type of crap. On the other hand he is being very nice so I am too.

 

[Cknldy]

Great exciting news! I received a call for a job Surprise of all of the surprises it was the long shot job that the emploment office personnel wasn't going to give me info on but I saw it on the computer screen. The company asked for at least a year of experience but I had all the other requirements so I asked for the information anyhow. The worst the company could do was say no or not call at all, right? They called! Yay- and it isn't minimum wage or cashier as I was expecting. She seemed to really like how I answered her questions (including why I thought I could do this job when I didn't have experience) and she is going to show me around on Tuesday. Wow- got the SIL coming for a professional looking haircut and a trip to the thrift store for clothes that fit and look professional. I'm used to disappearing into the background, not caring how I look and now I have to go find a pair of work shoes that fit! Lol, I am somebody again. Dh is about to be caught with his jaw on the floor I'm not telling him until SIL comes and only then because he'll ask why I'm paying her to cut my hair. I love it and am soooo excited! Happy cluckin!

 

[Kelly G]

CONGRATULATIONS!!! This is the best news ALL DAY!!!!

Maybe the beginning of a new life for you....you never know!!!!

 

[Cknldy]

Thank you, thank you!

 

[Peaches Lee]

That is super news! Good luck to you!

 

[punk-a-doodle]

Congrats, that is so exciting!!