Advice? SIS and SSI

[PineappleMama]

Warning, this is a rant... it's got family issues... politics... welfare... just a boatload of complications...


Okay, my sister, age 24, applied for Social Security Disability.

Mind you she's already getting $500+ per month in Food Stamps for her, 7yo DD, and 4mo DS in addition to the child support she gets for DD. I cannot tell you the last job she had, but I don't think she's ever kept one more than a couple weeks. SOMETHING (never her fault of course) goes wrong and she quits... I don't think she's ever once been fired.

ANYWHO... She figures if our uncle with emphysema AND cirrhosis can be considered disabled and therefor unable to perform his job... A/C work in Texas attics... then why not her...

And she wants to use our address to apply. Since she's STILL just living with people (no job no place) and that's rotated to I don't know how many homes total in the last year (yes, yes it has cost DD a number of days... weeks actually of school) she put our address in when she applied for food stamps. Didn't ask, just told me after the fact. I didn't sign squat to do with it, so if trouble hits it is on HER head... legally I cannot open her mail so there's no legal way for me to know what she's up to... leastways that's what I plan to tell anyone from FS/Medicaid if they ask. Mainly I'm keeping my trap shut because I've no doubt that if she didn't have the foodstamps and medicaid that her kids would not eat or get their shots.

So, she applied for SS disability based on "Mental Disability" and used our address WITHOUT ASKING TYVM... showed up today after her interview to ask me to fill out a form saying she, DD and DS are living here and that she's paying $50/mo in rent -she is willing to throw $50 worth of groceries aka our tax dollars our way so technically wouldn't be lying-

She claimed she had no choice in using our address. That the interviewer person said she HAD to use the address that is listed on her FS/Medicaid in order to apply.... well what the crap, why haven't you changed your address to where you've been staying? GAH!

Ah, and bonus points for the fact that she is getting FS/Med on her older son, WHO DOES NOT LIVE WITH HER... much less us. He lives with HIS dad. Who is not her DD's dad (that's the one paying support) or the BabyDS's dad who she's shacked up with at his cousin's or some such.

My first thought... and one that managed to slip out was "No wonder there's no hope of Social Security being around when DH retires"... she pretty well ignored that comment (surprising really since not getting her way usually results in a tantrum) and prattled on about how with SS then she'll be able to go to school and better herself and blah blah blah.

Problems... 1 I am not a freaking criminal and do not want to commit fraud. Made that clear when she wanted to put DD in our kids' school using our address.. No I will NOT fill out an affidavit saying she/you are living here... do you know what the fine is for that?!

2 I'm a Libertarian. I believe completely in PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY... she has NEVER shown a bit of it... with THREE kids... and this new level of leeching will just make it easier for her to continue not doing a darn thing. Her eldest is 7 years old for pete's sake... GROW UP.

3 The boyfriend, and the baby's daddy, is an unemployed, abusive alcoholic that she claims (again) that she wants to get away from... and that this will help... is she good at laying it on thick or what...

Anywho... anyone else ever been in a similar situation? Are there any tactful ways to say no or should I just resign myself to a family feud?

I'm thinking that I could maybe use hubby's FAFSA as an excuse... they DO check your income and whatnot for those forms...
Heck I'm surprised a blood sample isn't required... so, that might work...??

Basically though, it boils down to not wanting to commit fraud AND finding her actions morally repugnant. Dang.

 

[saddina]

Without getting into the finer points...

On the forms she can put an address for mail, and a temp. address for where she is currently staying, which would have avoided this mess.

If you accept the $50 in food stamp purchases, it's also fraud, and you will both be nailed for it.

I'd go with "I can't sign that, bob can loose his fafsa funding, they check it, and our taxes each year" (which is correct, the school does).



Now here's the disclaimer: I filed for SSD last week, I was in a car accident, and will not walk again.

 

[PineappleMama]

^ See that's what SSD is for. Folks that HAVE contributed to society, and now are UNABLE to do so. Not her at all, she never tried.

Yeah, I knew about the FS Fraud bit too, even knew people that were busted... it was NOT pretty. No jail, but heavy fines and paying back every dime too. Do NOT want to go there at all... even if I was into fraud it goes back to taking food out of my niece and nephew's mouths and I just can't do that when I know that my house has plenty... not caviar... but plenty.

Thanks for the confirmation about the FAFSA thing. I was grasping at straws, hoping for anything to avoid a feud so that she doesn't just freak and bolt, go back to old habits... all the things that hurt her kids... n'mind that when she's mad we don't see her... meaning DD doesn't see her BFF in the world (they're 8 mos apart)... it's a huge relief to find that I have a VALID... other than LAW (that never stopped her clearly)...

TYTYTYTY!

 

[saddina]

N/p

I did my internship for edu, by setting up other intern's schedules and helping them with aid forms. Quite a few were on public aid and we had to double check everything matched up. Some had mail sent to thier aunties' because they'd rent a house with 4 or 6 students, and didn't want the other girls to know they were on aid.

 

[PineappleMama]

Well, he's taking one course this summer... Metaphysics... and then he's got 3 in the fall plus Senior Thesis.

Of course, turns out his advisor 'forgot' to claim his spot for the ST "class" so it may be Spring before he graduates.

*sigh* He's gone through FIVE advisers in three semesters... he never even met two of them... no wonder things are wonky.

Wish he had one that was as thorough as you!

 

[saddina]

I never wanted anyone crying at my desk that they lost aid... I did have some that did it, but that was because they didn't keep thier grades up or otherwise messed up. (I'm a lil "fussy" about paperwork).

 

[PineappleMama]

No FUSSY is GOOD... fussy is following the rules and getting the best you can based on the work you put in LEGALLY.

That's the rub in this situation... nothing put in, but expecting a lifelong handout... and throw in fraud to boot.

*sigh* I just don't understand the whole mentality at all.

But at the same time I feel kind of hypocritical because I'm a stay at home mom. True, all through HS (and before for that matter, first job was at 13 waitressing) I worked. Part time and full time depending on my school schedule... because I was required to pay for my own car insurance, my own lunches, my own clothes, etc. I think this attitude started way back when because the same responsibilities weren't placed on her.

ANYWHO, I've had part time jobs since I've had kids. Evenings after B gets home, or during the school day... so no day care needed... but for the most part I'm a mom and that's all... so I can just hear her saying "Who are you to talk" if I bring up any of these points and really, who AM I to talk. So NOT looking forward to this chat.

Think I'll go check my Tums supply.

 

[saddina]

Quote:
Why, you're the woman who had the sence to marry a man who was able and willing to work extra so your kids could have a parent at home. (frankly I don't care which parent stays home one at home is almost always better over group care).

 

[chickensducks&agoose]

we've gotten FS before, and it really did make things so much better. I worried less, the kids were happier, the fridge was fuller. DH used to be in the trades, and around here, everyone gets laid off in november and re-hired in april, (building season)... so those months were very, very lean, with him trying to find work, even commuting hours to have a job. And as a stay at home mom of 3, with really no education (got pregnant at 19, and am sloooowly making it through CC), finding a job around here is hard, and DH isn't fit to stay at home with the kids.... So, anyway, I just wanted to put in my opinion that FS isn't just for moochers/cheats... sometimes it is the only thing that keeps the heat on AND food on the table.

 

[redhen]

chickensducks&agoose :

we've gotten FS before, and it really did make things so much better. I worried less, the kids were happier, the fridge was fuller. DH used to be in the trades, and around here, everyone gets laid off in november and re-hired in april, (building season)... so those months were very, very lean, with him trying to find work, even commuting hours to have a job. And as a stay at home mom of 3, with really no education (got pregnant at 19, and am sloooowly making it through CC), finding a job around here is hard, and DH isn't fit to stay at home with the kids.... So, anyway, I just wanted to put in my opinion that FS isn't just for moochers/cheats... sometimes it is the only thing that keeps the heat on AND food on the table.

I dont believe that she said everyone on FS is a mooch/cheat.... just her sister.
I hate when i see people use the system.. it makes me sick.​