Any other childless chicken moms out there?

[devora]

I’m 48 and childless by choice. When I was 18 I went to the clinic to ask for a tubal ligation. I was refused b/c of my age.

I went back when I turned 21. After a drilling (e.g. Q: But what if you meet a man and want to have his child? A: And what if he gets run over by a truck and I have to raise the kids all on my own?) I got my operation. It was the best decision I ever made. I was aware I might have regrets, but none (I mean none) have ever arisen. I was not abused, I had a wonderful boyfriend, life was good. I simply did not want children.

I’m sure you can do the math and realize I made this decision 30 years ago. It was not easy, not b/c the decision was difficult but b/c society was so incapable of accepting my choice. It was unheard of! But I got what I wanted. I got to travel, have an incredibly spontaneous lifestyle, become formally educated, and never, ever experience being covered w/ baby food.

By the way, the ligation was a dead easy operation, and that was ages ago. I’m sure it’s even easier now. It’s out-patient, and the incisions are so small they do not need stitches. Piece o’ cake!

 

[DuckLady]

This is a great thread.
It is nice to know we are not alone with our decisions. I know I have never regretted it. And the comments I have gotten over the years? Their problem, not mine.
I totally hear you Devora.
To my docs
Age 18 "I don't want kids, DO something"
Age 24 "I don't want kids. DO something"
Age 30 "I STILL don't want kids I want a hyst"
Age 35 "HYST HYST HYST"
Age 40. Medical issues and nagging got me my hyst. I am freeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!! hehehe.

 

[silkiechicken]

Quote:
Man, just think how nice that would be in some places... then if they couldn't even afford the surgery, they couldn't afford the kids!

 

[Buff Hooligans]

"HYST HYST HYST ! ! !" - very funny post!

Thanks to all you wonderful women with kids who understand and don't try to belittle us. We aren't used to such openmindedness!

And let's all take a moment to thank in our hearts a woman named Margaret Higgins Sanger, who died in 1966 but who fought the early fight for birth control for American women.

 

[Buff Hooligans]

OH NO ! ! I just got invited to a BABY SHOWER !
Is that karma or what??

Anybody know where I can find a baby bib with a chicken on it?

 

[newchickowner]

 

[EweSheep]

Talk about hyst!!!!

Im 42 years old and got tons of problems with back (sciatic nerve damage due to attempted delivery and weigh issues). My maternal line family, mother, sis and her female siblings and grandmas, all had to have hysters at a young age and every one of them keep telling their doc that their uteruses need to be take out because of the complications. OH NO, the doc kept saying oh try this...try that and by the time we all get so worn out and a whole lot of pain and weight loss or gain, and TONS of trials of BC, none of them work...then the doc said OK lets go to surgery! Jeez, it doesnt take a rocket scientist to figure that one out! Imagine how much money we would have saved by going to the short cut and done with children or rather be childless.

My sis and mother had hysters when they were in the mid 30's but sis had her uterus "burned out" (I forgot what it was called) and they both never regretted it since both of them are finished having kids.

Now I dont have that much problems like they did, but I flat out told my OB doc that no way in h*** I would take any BC because of the nasty side effects and does nothing for my periods (major cramping) and give me a darn hyster. Well he said, try this BC.....I was so digusted with the doc that I threw out the samples of the BC and said to heck with it and have myself suffer more until it gets to the point that I can not endure so much back pain and cramps. I told him all my female relatives all had that problem...solution....hysters or burning out uterus but leave the ovaries alone! Man, we gotta suffer so much before they can operate on us!

Devora: I LOVE your answer about what if hubby or BF got ran over...etc. LOL

At least you got a point there!

mhleran: I think doctors are so darn ignorant of your wishes and hubby's wishes of not having kids...too many people get too sue happy and from what I got from my doc, I signed all documents and read thru them, its permanent and reserval of tubes are not guaranteed to be "fixed" whole so you can change your mind later of having kids.

Momsfolly: ooooooooooo I hate that quote of doc saying "Iknow what you really want"...what the heck does HE know what the woman want....its almost like a vet saying to you, lets try having a litter out of your dog before we spay her...we know what you want! Yeah, unwanted litters! If it is ok for us to spay and neuter our cats and dogs BY choice, then by God, we should do too! Too many "unwanted" kids out there wanting adoptions and no one to care for them.....dont forget foster kids too!

 

[Agilityscots]

Quote:
Yes on both accounts. You're right, Buff, we're not used to such openmindedness. I'm really surprised by how thoughtful and kind the moms and future moms have been on this board; I was bracing myself for the same type of reception I usually get when I admit I don't want kids (all of which have already been mentioned). What an enlightened group!

I hate baby showers. They're just too weird for me and I can never wait to get the heck out of there.

When my BIL and his wife announced their impending birth at our party (which I wrote about in another post), I forgot to mention that we were invited to the birth. SIL just comes right out and says, "Oh yes, you're all invited to the birth" with a stupid grin plastered on her face, as if we've just been invited to the party of the century. Dead silence. You could hear crickets chirping, I swear. She's so dumb that she's never noticed that our MIL is so uptight and perfectionistic that she puts Martha Stewart to shame; it only takes about two brain cells to figure out that my in-laws would NEVER want to be in the room staring at their DIL's crotch. My BIL looked at her and said, in front of everyone in a low voice, "We didn't talk about this." Nobody said a word. Needless to say, we all visited in the hospital but NONE of us were there for the birth...as it should be!

Amy

 

[Agilityscots]

Quote:
Terrie, do you mind if I ask...why did you want a hysterectomy instead of something less invasive? (like a tubal) I hope I'm not being too pushy here, but since we're sort of letting it all hang out on this thread...

Amy

 

[DuckLady]

Well, I had endometriosis starting in my teens with all the pain and illness that goes with it and it got to the point I was in "that time" 3 weeks out of 4, in excruciating pain and drugged for it. If you want more details email me privately. I just wanted it all out so I didn't have to deal with it all. Eew.