anyone else raiseing young grandbabies

[lone oak]

i am and lots of days i wonder what in the world am i trying to do. i want to play with mine, spoil them and send them home and then it is like oh yeah i played, i spoiled and now i am putting them to bed everynight. i am tooooooo old for all this, but i love him so much and he had no choice so here we are. kinda like the song i know what i was feeling but what was i thinking. i know sick, i should not question, i am just soooooooooooo tired. i want to sleep and he wants to play. i do right by himl, but i steadly think i am too old and i just want it all to stop. like what have i done to deserve this, what have i done to owe my life to this. but what would my life be without all this. does anyone understand?

 

[rebbetzin]

My husband and his two younger sisters were raised by their grandparents. Their mom comitted suicide, and their father lived in another state with a new wife and other children. It was not what they wanted to at that time in their life. But... what can you do?

I have several family members raising the offspring of their own children or some other family member.
It is very common these days.
I am sure you will find someone here who is having the same experience.
'It can't be easy.

May you be given an extra measure of energy to cope.

 

[Mahonri]

It has to be hard.

I imagine I'll be dead before I get too many grandchildren, and I'm PRAYING my wife doesn't have to raise any.

 

[wolftracks]

My daughter was having a hard time a little over 4 years ago. I had talked to her and felt helpless. Didn't want to say anything to my husband, but we were sitting together and he asked what was wrong. I told him nothing and he told me not to lie to him. I let him know and he said "Call her and tell her to bring us the baby." I didn't think it would be a good idea, since him and my daughter had butted heads a lot, but he handed me the phone and told me to call her.

She turned 5 on New Years Eve. This is grandpa's girl and since he died, she's been a handful. She misses him and she takes it out on me, but we're working on it. I get so tired and so frustrated, but at night she wants to do all the things that grandpa did at bedtime, so once that's done she's out. She's so sweet. When she's sleeping. LOL It kind of helps me at night when we can do those grandpa things. Or when I say something and she says "No Grandma, say it like Grandpa!" Makes me feel like he's still here a little.

My other kids have offered to take her now that I'm alone. My daughter asked if it was too much for me and if she should take her home now, but I know her. She'll get distracted and not think ahead. I need her to finish what she's doing and then take her.

But yeah...............................I'm so tired. I get nothing done and then get to tired to sleep.

I feel ya!

 

[perolane]

I am raising my granddaughter...she'll be 7 next month. Every single day I say at least once, "I'm too old for this!" I love her dearly, but I miss the quiet so much! I miss doing the things I thought I'd be doing at this stage of my life.

DH is the spoiler...I am the disciplinarian, so we knock heads alot. I'm always reminded of the "wait till your father gets home"...now it's "wait till your Mammy gets home"!

He would give her the moon if she wanted it...but she treats him like crap. I think I am more frustrated with him because he makes my role so much harder. I am SO tired.

My daughters didn't dare defy me, smart off, used yes mamn & yes sir...everything is a constant struggle with this one. I fear the teenage years that are coming soon will be the end of me!

All of us who do this...I believe we deserve a special place in heaven....it seems so much harder the 2nd time around!

 

[vickie2133]

God bless the grandparents that have taken in these kids. Have you ever stopped to think of where they would end up with out you all in their lives? Maybe God placed them in your care because you are proven to be good parents. You are heros, I admire you all.

 

[wolftracks]

Quote:
I used my husband this time as the disciplinarian. I'm the one that gets walked on. But he was also so good with her. I don't know what happened this time around. With my kids I was on them! I kind of get a kick out of all the grown now kids I see that grew up with them. They have all told me they were afraid of me. I did things with them, took them places and my house was the house they all ran away to. Boy did I spend a lot of late hours with parents that would call to see if they were ready to go home yet. LOL Still they said they never thought to cross me. Guess I did my job then huh? hehe

This one. OMG she can be so cute and so sweet, but she's got a temper and thinks she's in charge. Now when mommy is here, she tows the line. I even call mom when she's having one of her fits and she's tells her she better be nice to her momma. Then I get "Grandma why did you tell?" "I'm sorry, but don't tell my mom, OK?"

I have often used the line though. "I'm too old for this!" I know she'll be going full time with mom eventually and I should be excited, but then I think "What do I do then? How do I give her up after being with her most of her life so far?"

She is asking more about living with mommy and her younger sister though, but I want education that my daughter can use her whole life and I want her to be able to do it and finish with a few less worries. Besides, who would go to Starbucks with me for the kid's hot choclotale? Most of the Granddaughter's are teens. They order more expensive stuff! LOL

 

[sfw2]

Quote:
I'm not in your position - I don't have grandchildren, yet - but I've often said this about folks who are. God bless all of you, and I pray he gives you the strength - and the stamina- to stay the course.

 

[welsummerchicks]

God bless you and give you energy, and strength.

I wish I was nearby. You could send them over here for a break and you could take a nap and eat icecream and put your feet up for awhile.

Unfortunately, they'd come back knowing words like 'indulgent' and 'self-effacing', but they would be able to gather eggs, make biscuits and catch and halter a pony and hitch it to a cart.

OH THEY'RE TWO? Well maybe we'll leave out the hitching the pony til next year.

AND THEY WOULD BE VERY TIRED! LOL!!!

I did get in trouble once when I sent a 3 year old back and she said to her mother, 'Spare me the explanation'.

 

[perolane]

Quote:
Do ya think we could ship them to you USPS Priority just like eggs???

Thanks all of you

...I guess BYC is one of our little pleasures in life!!