blended families

[jqs birds]

I grew up in a blended family and have my own children as well as a step daughter. So from my experience I would say. You need to talk to his father. Stay calm and don't point fingers. Just explain that you want them to have a good relationship and that your son needs that relationship. Maybe he can make an effort with your son to spend some time just the two of them doing anything. Kids are sensitive to changes with parents and new kids. He just needs to know that no matter what his father loves him and wants to be with him. That the new baby does not mean his father loves him less, it just means he has a new sibling and someone else who when they get older will love him too.

 

[rainplace]

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lol, everyone is posting so fast!

 

[conny63malies]

Your son was the center of attention for the longest time. Could it be that he is jealous of his new half-brother? This happend with us. My DH youngest with his ex was really mean and jealous when they visited. He older siblings were playing with our kids we hve together and she was a bit left out.

 

[rainplace]

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I like this.

 

[FortWorthChicks]

Hello, Sorry to hear your having problems.

I have a blended family... I married had a son and then divorced his father. VERY SORTED mixed family. He married one of the girls he used to cheat with after he got her pregnant. bla bla. Point is when their new baby was born my sons stepmom started being very mean to him.

Putting him out in the rain ect.. saying she needed quality time in the house and he was not allowed inside. I heard from a neighbor of theirs who got my information and gave me a call. The concerned neighbor was very helpful because I had no idea what was happening over there.

I called his dad and said something along the lines of I know you have a new baby and things are stressful right now how bout I keep Graham home while things settle down. Offering help worked like a charm. They thought I was just being nice and low and behold I was protecting my son.

Then I told my son to tell his grandma whats been going on so that their problems would stay in their family and they did not feel like I was sticking my nose in their business. Stepmom went to counceling for her issues with my son... and well I hear she is being as nice as (she) can be.

Best of luck!!!

 

[dichotomymom]

I like that idea too! My intention is to help them mend their relationship with out anyone directly getting their feelings hurt! I want to stress that I don't see anyone as the bad guy, my son is well treated over there and that I have no animosity. I just want to know the best way to approach it so I'm not going into it blindly and upsetting the delicate balance that is the every other weekend kinda family.

 

[FortWorthChicks]

My sons stepmom wasn't really the bad guy, she was more the hormone crazed woman who just almost died giving birth and then had a baby who apparently would not stop crying. There was more going on than the neighbors saw.

I just wanted to help my son.

I think the direct approach with the old "there is a new baby... he feels dissed because people are tired after they have a baby. Mom and dad both... its natural.. and it will pass but some extra love and appreciation for big brother is in ORDER

" should solve things.

 

[dichotomymom]

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Yep, that's how I'll do it, I think! Thank you all We all love him and want what's best. Unfortuantely lines of communication are naturally crossed because we don't all live together.

 

[thechickenchick]

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I like this.

Me too.

 

[DuckLady]

Sounds like Dad is really tired, especially if he is very involved with helping care for the new baby. Who doesn't act a little short when they are tired?