Broody? Or something else?

[Going Quackers]

Thank you. I know you are right. I am trying to stop beating myself up, I took her as soon as I thought it was necessary, but I can't shake the feeling that maybe I should have done it sooner. Who knows. I do believe that she did not suffer from a lot of pain, even the vet said that, so I will try to take comfort in that. I just get so attached to all the pets we have, even the fosters. And it is hard when they leave this world suddenly.
I am hoping the necropsy sheds some light on exactly what was happening, and it gives me some closure.

Hopefully it will, sadly when we care we think that gives us superpowers to have a window into all that is ailing, it doesn't.

 

[Hulahooper]

Ok, just spoke to the vet. I will try to make this make sense.
It was pretty much her heart. From the way I understood it, her body was starting to shut down. She was not broody but just exhausted. What was odd was that there was absolutely no evidence of egg production anywhere. Nothing forming at all. She was only 3. So, between the fact that she was fairly young and the time of year, it was strange that she had totally stopped producing eggs at all. All her other organs were healthy. But her heart was working so hard she just was too tired to do anything, including eat. There was nothing in her intestines or stomach, so she had stopped eating. I did see her eat a bit here and there and assumed she was eating just when I was not around. The vet did say while the heart thing was probably something she had all along, that it had only gotten worse very recently. Because she had not lost much weight. There was a lot more to what she said, but it is difficult for me to remember so this is the gist of it all. She was never a real healthy looking bird, but she always acted fine, very active and normal. But the fact that she always looked a bit "off" is probably tied into her heart issues.
So, all in all, there was nothing I could have done for her. It was not reasonable to expect to put her on heart meds. I did not raise her from a duckling and she was not easily handled, so any medicating would have been a struggle for both of us and would have put more stress on her. The vet said I made the right call letting her go, so that is a small comfort.
I know she had a nice life here. I don't know what her early life was like, but I want to think she was happy here with her flock, she had plenty to eat, plenty of water to drink and play in, and free range on the property most of the time. She had a dry place to go to get out of the elements and I found her inside more than any of the other ducks. Hindsight being 20/20 maybe that should have been a clue, but I guess I missed that one. I feel bad for that, but don't know what I could have done at that point. She was normal otherwise.
Ugh. This rots.

 

[Amiga]

Thanks for that explanation. It is awful. And you did provide a good home for her.

 

[Hulahooper]

I did. But why does that not feel like enough?
Thank you for your understanding. It is hard sometimes to make people understand just how attached you can get to a duck.

 

[Going Quackers]

Well i think here you will find those who fully understand the dedication, emotionally, physically and financially. So basically it sounds like she had a heart defect? or something close to that, genetic perhaps or a fluke, seems that it's your good care that kept her alive that long, clearly she needed top notch facilities in order to cope as she had special needs.

 

[Miss Lydia]

Well i think here you will find those who fully understand the dedication, emotionally, physically and financially. So basically it sounds like she had a heart defect? or something close to that, genetic perhaps or a fluke, seems that it's your good care that kept her alive that long, clearly she needed top notch facilities in order to cope as she had special needs.

X2

 

[Hulahooper]

GQ-yes, the vet believes she did have a heart defect from birth. I had not had her all that long, we brought her home in March 2012. But she never looked as good as the other ducks no matter what I did. But she kept up with them until just a few days ago. She had been laying up until then. I guess that it was just too much for her body and it started to take it's toll. So sad.
And you are right, there are many on here who do "get" it in regard to how much a duck can mean to someone. I am grateful for those of you. And I thank you all from the bottom of my heart.

 

[Going Quackers]

GQ-yes, the vet believes she did have a heart defect from birth. I had not had her all that long, we brought her home in March 2012. But she never looked as good as the other ducks no matter what I did. But she kept up with them until just a few days ago. She had been laying up until then. I guess that it was just too much for her body and it started to take it's toll. So sad.
And you are right, there are many on here who do "get" it in regard to how much a duck can mean to someone. I am grateful for those of you. And I thank you all from the bottom of my heart.

I see, well then again clearly no fault lays with you. You provided a wonderful home, and obviously you cared, she wasn't left to die alone nor in poor conditions which would have shortened her life. Look at this as a testament to your care vs a failure.

 

[Hulahooper]

Again, thank you for your comforting words. I did try to make her life as great as I could and to make the end as fast and kind as possible. I am better this morning. I know now I was up against something that nothing would have changed, her heart was not healthy and nothing I could have done would have changed that. She was a sweet duck and I am lucky to have been her guardian.