BYC's Random Funny Posting Thread! Hosts Mike & Sally

[TooCheep]

 

[ValerieJ]

I had my patience tested.

I’m negative.

 

[ValerieJ]

Remember, if you lose a sock in the dryer,
it comes back as a Tupperware lid
that doesn’t fit any of your containers.

 

[ValerieJ]

Age 60 might be the new 40, but 9:00 is new midnight.

 

[ValerieJ]

I finally got eight hours of sleep.
It took me three days, but whatever.

 

[ValerieJ]

When someone asks what I did over the weekend,
I squint and ask, “Why, what did you hear?”

 

[ValerieJ]

When you do squats, are your knees supposed to sound like a goat chewing on an aluminum can stuffed with celery?

 

[ValerieJ]

I don’t mean to interrupt people.
I just randomly remember things and get really excited.

 

[ValerieJ]

When I ask for directions, please don’t use words like “east.”

 

[ValerieJ]

It’s the start of a brand new day, and I’m off like a herd of turtles.