Can y'all proof read this for me

[gaited horse]

Here are my latest updates on it how does it look now


When raising market hogs, it is to start by finding a high protein feeds that are made for growing pigs into good market hogs. Pigs ten weeks and under should be fed a starter ration with minimum of twenty percent protein. They should be giving free choice feeding at this age. In addition, they should have plenty of clean water at all times. After your pigs reach seventy pounds, they should be switched to a grower ration of no less than eighteen percent protein and be feed as much as they want for one half of an hour, and feed every three hours until they bed down for the night. After they reach a weight of 150 pounds they should be switched to a finisher of no less then 16 percent protein, and be fed a minimum of three pounds a day and a maximum of 4 pounds a day. After a happy lifespan of six months they reach should reach market weight.




Notes on market hogs:
Market hogs normal life span is six months of age or 250-260 pounds.
Market hogs do best when raised outside unlike the store bought pork.
Barrows make the best market hogs.
It is illegal to feed pigs and hogs raw meat.
A pig is not a hog until the weight of 100 pounds.

 

[mom'sfolly]

I suggest you read the first sentence aloud. It is either missing a word or has too many words.

When raising market hogs, it is to start.....just doesn't make sense.

Additionally, in your notes section I would define barrow.

I think you have gotten plenty of good answers, and have tightened your writing considerably. Even better, it is still clearly your writing.

 

[gaited horse]

Thanks y'all I sent it in this am I will let you know what the grand was.

 

[Iowa Roo Mom]

Quote:
The first highlighted section should have an "a" added.... It should read, "...with a minimum of twenty percent protein."

Both of the bolded words "feed" should be changed to "fed"

The bolded number 4 should be changed to the word "four". As a general rule, you should not go from spelling to using the number form.

 

[The Chicken Lady]

In the first sentence, I would add the word "best", as in "it is best to start by".

 

[arabookworm]

Quote:
I put changes in bold, hope that helped.

 

[The Chicken Lady]

"After they reach a weight of 150 pounds, they should be switched to a finisher of no less than 16 percent protein, and be fed a minimum of three pounds a day and a maximum of 4 pounds a day. After a happy lifespan of six months, they should reach market weight."

"Market hogs' normal life span is six months of age or until they reach 250-260 pounds." An apostrophe is necessary to show that the normal life span belongs to the market hogs (it's their life span).

 

[Eggs4Sale]

 

[ScoobyRoo]

Quote:
We will be waiting.