Of course we have! This is exactly why we participate in this thread and convey the results of our mistakes to newbies so that they don't have to make those same mistakes. If the tone or tenor of that advice seems rough or not sugary enough for said newbies, it's merely because we just don't get into all the mushy, huggy, oh, honey stuff like the other threads. It seriously isn't meant to sound mean or jerkish in any way we are just tired of having to preface all our advice with all the polite, gentle chit chat that seems required reading on BYC.
The first few pages are the explanation for that tone...we are participating in a thread that gives you free, valuable advice so that you won't have to make the same mistakes that we made and if it sounds like tough love, it is. We have better things to do with our lives than nurture and nurse along a bunch of newbies, just like all the oldsters had better things to do that we have learned from...and the advice they gave us was pretty much just as gruff.
And we learned that the OTs seriously didn't care if we followed that advice....
but they cared enough to give it. And, for me at least, that was enough....it might not sound sweet, it might even sound mean, but it was still the best advice I ever got and when I followed it, it worked. Did I care if the OT made me sound like an idiot when I asked about the things I needed to know? Nope. I asked because I didn't know and they answer because they didn't mind sharing what they did know but they certainly weren't going to tie it up in a red bow and try to make me feel good about it....nor did I expect it. I'm a big girl and I don't need to be treated like a child if I'm old enough to care for animals.
The fact that we even take the time to answer the questions should be something to be thankful for...it's not something we simply HAVE to do. Some days we feel mellow and try to sugar it up some, some days we just simply don't have the time or will to make it into a nice package. Either way you still get a valuable product...it's up to you if you want to use it~ or throw it away simply because it came in an ugly, brown box. No one's being mean to you or trying to hurt your feelings and that is made pretty clear on the first few pages...this is just how we talk amongst each other and on this thread. If that sort of thread isn't something a reader wishes to experience the first pages made it sufficiently clear enough that one could opt out of using this thread to garner advice.
There are much sweeter threads and people out there who are eager to PM you and offer you all kinds of advice and you have many options besides this thread, which is a great thing!