Dealing with the death of a beloved pet

[Avalon1984]

I was wondering how all of you farmers deal with the death of a beloved animal? If you had one animal that was your pet, your buddy and nothing that you tried to do to save it helped and you ended up having to put it down? You know you have to do it but it just hurts so bad? How do you ever get over this? How do you tell when it is the right time and how do you feel if you realize you should have done it sooner and just added to the animals suffering by trying to help it? I just had this happen this weekend and it is tearing me apart badly. Part of me is looking for ways I should have been able to see a problem a while ago, part of me feels like a failure for not granting the animal the one last act of human kindness and end its suffering quickly, rather than trying to save it for hours. Have you ever encountered anything like that? Am I the only one? What are your experiences?

 

[chicmom]

Well, I'm not exactly a farmer, but I definitely went through this just recently, with my pomeranian, Cosmo. He was appx 9 years old, and he had numerous health problems: Luxating patellas on his back legs, spinal problems, his trachea collapsed sometimes, causing him to honk/bark.........The problems were all very expensive to fix. Each back leg would cost $1600 to fix, his trachea was a $2000.00 surgery, even a back surgery would have been very expensive. More than I could afford.

At times, he would have very bad days. One time in particular, he was pretty much immoble for nearly a week. Just lying on the bed, looking sad and helpless....I had to carry him outside to go potty......He didn't want to eat....His back was out of whack.

Each trip to the vet cost my family money......And it would only get worse. On his good days, he seemed very normal. IT seemed like if we went for a car ride, to the groomer or even the vet, he would get so excited that he would forget about his aches and pains.

His attitude was changing too. He became more and more ornery, to the point of biting people, and peeing on things. So with small grandchildren being in the house, we couldn't risk the biting, plus, I didn't want him to have to finally blow out a knee or suffocate from a spell where his trachea would re-open. He also began limping on a front leg as well.

My husband and I took him to the vets and had him put down a few days before our grandson Carson (who now lives with us) was born. We both cried in the vets office. (I couldn't believe my husband cried.....he's a real gruff fellow). I couldn't stand the idea of burying his little body, so we had him cremated. Here it is, over a month later, and I still cry occasionally. I cried just this weekend when I showed someone his little urn.

It does get better though. I can talk about the cute, or funny things Cosmo used to do and I don't usually cry. I still feel kind of bad though, about putting him to sleep. I killed my pet, basically. It's a harsh reality. But I do think it was the right time to do it. And I'm starting to come to peace with my decision.

I hope you feel better soon, and don't feel guilty. You didn't keep your beloved friend alive so you could hurt him, it was because you loved him.

Take care,
Sharon

 

[jerseygirl1]

I hope you feel better soon, and don't feel guilty. You didn't keep your beloved friend alive so you could hurt him, it was because you loved him. Perfectly said, chicmom

My sympathies on the loss of your pet,it's never, ever easy

 

[inputoutput]

Any way you approach it, you would still feel sorrowful because you loved them, and that is all that matters. The road you chose was the one you thought best. You loved them enough to feel sorrow for them and to try to help them in the way that you could. If it were up to the animal they would have continued their lives in and out of pain until they could not, and then as most do it would have taken itself somewhere quiet to pass on alone either from pain or starvation or sickness or predation from another stronger animal. Quickly or slowly, as nature does its thing.

What I'm saying is it sounds like you did your best with what you were given. We don't often see what animals are experiencing because it is their nature to hide it. We can only learn from their strength. It is hard for us as humans to say goodbye, I'd never fault anyone who waited or tried to do whatever they could to prolong the life of someone they loved. Nor would I someone who put an animal to sleep quickly to spare it a long, painful road.

 

[Avalon1984]

Thank you two. I have put animals down before, some of them were my favorite animals too. I had some chickens that I tried to save and ended up having to put them down anyways. I had a guinea pig that lived way past what anybody predicted and when the time came to let him go no vet would do it since it was an “exotic” so I ended up doing the deed myself. This one just really threw me out of whack. The animal became so sick basically overnight and with hardly any time to prepare, my options were limited. I sat there for hours contemplating what treatment I hadn’t tried yet just to figure out that all attempts to help seemed futile. I always thought I’d be stronger than that, that I would know when the right time was and would not hesitate to do the right thing- and I failed myself royally yesterday. I guess you get stronger over time, and the more often this happens, the easier it will be to know what to do. But those darn animals just pull on your heartstrings at times…

 

[watchdogps]

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[Avalon1984]

Quote:
I read the review on that on MSN. Sounds very good!

 

[Orchid]

I had to make the decision to let my oldest gelding go this fall. We laid him to rest last Friday. Whether it's simply body failure due to old age, a lingering illness or something very sudden, it is never an easy decision. When it's a fast or sudden illness or injury, sometimes you just don't have time to process it all and make a decision before they pass on their own. Don't beat yourself up.

 

[SillyChicken]

time...... and sometimes longer......

 

[sourland]

The time that you choose becomes the 'right' time. It's a tough decision yet one that we as responsible/loving pet owners must make. Do not beat your self up over the coulda/shoulda/wouldas.