do I have the right to be upset?

[wingsofglory]

Some people cannot hear the word "NO." They DO hear "My charge for incubating eggs is $8 an egg, in advance." When you put the value on your time and incubator space, they then have to agree or leave or tell you to your face you are not worth anything - which gets the issue out in the open and beyond the manipulation.

I've been looking around for chicks and at hatching eggs this spring. Prices are WAY UP. Its up to $75 a dozen for hatching eggs here on CL for purebred like BCM. And chicks in the mail from the States run up to $12 a chick for Lav Orps, $8 and on down to $5 or so for other breeds like Ameraucana, not counting postage of $40. Big hatcheries are running over $3 a chick. So you can value yourself accordingly.

Hope it works out. Feeling invalidated, and manipulated, and/or used, is the worst.

 

[sunny & the 5 egg layers]

Quote:
When I get to many eggs in my fridge from my chickens i usually as a nice neighbor take them over to her for her family to eat since my family is much smaller than hers. When i took the 14 eggs over to her she stated that she just got her eggs out of the coop and why don't i give you these and i will just boil your eggs instead. She new i had just purchased a incubator a few weeks back. There was never a small lil hint or conversation stating she ever wanted half. I really do think she is trying to use me because my family and i just got home from eating out and there was a note on my door stating she stopped by to pick up her chicks and that she now has duck eggs for me to put in the incubator!!!! What??? I don't know anything about ducks. I am really thinking she wants me to be her personal incubator.

I don't know how to tell if they are hens or roosters at this early of an age so NO i would not give her all roos. Like i said i am letting my kids pick out the ones that they want and then the rest she can have.

I am not trying to be an evil person but I think with my time, effort and cash (electric bills, feed, etc). I feel I deserve alot more than half of the chicks.

I think i am a great neighbor. I am always recusing her dogs when they get loose, giving her eggs with never asking anything in return from her and my husband is a mechanic and has fixed her car a couple of times with also never asking to be paid and this is what she does to me.

I know there was no misunderstanding.

Am I wrong???

You are not wrong by any means.

If I was you I wouldnt hatch the duck eggs because you are letting her take advantage of you again. Don't let her walk all over you, stand your ground.

I feel sorry for you. I would hate to be in that situation. I hope all goes well.

 

[mmaddie's mom]

NO NO NO no hatching of duck eggs! Give her the web-site info. for Brinsea... sounds like she NEEDS her own incubator!

 

[DelcoChix]

"I am not trying to be an evil person but I think with my time, effort and cash (electric bills, feed, etc). I feel I deserve alot more than half of the chicks. "

Don't see any signs of evil here...just reality. Was it Ann Landers or Dear Abby who said..."Take advantage of me once, shame on you. Take advantage of me twice, shame on me."
If she's that blatant about taking advantage of you/your time/your purchase then sometimes you need to address it head on, being subtle doesn't work. I don't mean you have to be nasty, but let her know that you have plans for your incubator and really appreciate her allowing you to have a trial run with the eggs she "gave" you, but neither ducks, nor any other species of her birds, are in your future plans...and give her the info to purchase her very own incubator. If she digs deeper, pressures you, tries to guilt you into one more egg-setting, then you can decide if it's worth your time (and emotion) to charge her a fair price for your time, power bill, cost of the incubator, and emotion to hatch some fuzzbutts for her...you have all the power, your choice.
Sounds like like have been a good neighbor, you can still be one, the definition does not include doing whatever is asked/demanded of you. Good luck.

 

[chicken crazed 1o1]

I think you have the right to get upset

.

 

[Pele]

When I get to many eggs in my fridge from my chickens i usually as a nice neighbor take them over to her for her family to eat since my family is much smaller than hers. When i took the 14 eggs over to her she stated that she just got her eggs out of the coop and why don't i give you these and i will just boil your eggs instead. She new i had just purchased a incubator a few weeks back. There was never a small lil hint or conversation stating she ever wanted half. I really do think she is trying to use me because my family and i just got home from eating out and there was a note on my door stating she stopped by to pick up her chicks and that she now has duck eggs for me to put in the incubator!!!! What??? I don't know anything about ducks. I am really thinking she wants me to be her personal incubator.

I don't know how to tell if they are hens or roosters at this early of an age so NO i would not give her all roos. Like i said i am letting my kids pick out the ones that they want and then the rest she can have.

I am not trying to be an evil person but I think with my time, effort and cash (electric bills, feed, etc). I feel I deserve alot more than half of the chicks.

I think i am a great neighbor. I am always recusing her dogs when they get loose, giving her eggs with never asking anything in return from her and my husband is a mechanic and has fixed her car a couple of times with also never asking to be paid and this is what she does to me.

I know there was no misunderstanding.

Am I wrong???

Ah, well I was hoping that there was some misunderstanding just so your life would be less stressful. I'm sorry that you're being taken advantage of. It could be that she has no idea how much work goes into incubation.

I still wouldn't get confrontational with her just for your safety and peice of mind, but you know what would be really funny to do? The next time she mentions incubating say: "Oh heavens no I'll never do that again! I just put the stupid thing up for sale on e-bay! Gosh it took SO much work, and SO much of my time, I can't believe anyone would want to get hatching eggs. All those people who do are crazy! Must have been some sort of crazy phase for me. Say.... do you have any broodies by any chance?"

Hopefully that way she'll realize just how much she's trying to inconvenience you, and since you've theoretically gotten rid of the thing, you won't ever be asked to incubate again

Good luck!​

 

[Donna in Montana]

I would have immediately told her she could rethink that thought.... Wouldn't care if she got her shorts in a bind or not.

Incubating eggs isn't a 'free' project.. electricity is used for 21 days.. and the chicks have already become "my children" before they hatch.

You didn't eat half the eggs you gave her in exchange..... why on earth would she even consider you'd give her chicks?

Remember that people can't take advantage of you unless you let them.

 

[lvchicken]

I would be honest with her too. I mean you don't have to be rude, just tell her the truth....before it's too late......

 

[AprilWC]

I've been reading this post in hopes that was just a misunderstanding. However, if she's wanting you to hatch ducks eggs now, she is taking advantage of you. Don't be rude, because you DO have to live next to this person. Nothing is worse than upset neighbors. But be up front with her. Tell her that there is a huge investment in incubating eggs - NOT just in the initial price of the incubator itself but in electricity, time, etc. If you wanted to hatch more eggs for her, give her a price to do it. Don't do it for free. I'd also write out the agreement and have her sign it. It sounds petty but she is adding on to the previous agreement you guys had.

 

[KYChixMama]

She sounds like someone that needs clear boundaries set or they will expect (and feel thery deserve) more and more and more. Set firm but friendly boundaries with her and stick to them. I have found that there are many people that, like children, need boundaries set for them.