Don't judge what you don't understand!

Discussion in 'Family Life - Stories, Pictures & Updates' started by Anna_MN, Feb 29, 2012.

  1. Anna_MN

    Anna_MN Chillin' With My Peeps

    Dec 4, 2011
    Princeton, MN
    So my chicks are about 12 days old. My sister in law and brother came over today after an appt. she had. She wanted to see my chicks so I took her downstairs to the basement to see them. She said they were cute and seemed interested in them and then we started talking about other things and I went upstairs. Well when I came back downstairs they didn't hear me and I heard my sister in law complaining about my chicks. I know I shouldn't have listened but this is what I heard- "Those things are so f****** gross! Why would someone ever keep wild animals in their house? They smell like s*** too. All the clothes hanging up there are going to smell terrible when those things finally go outside. Hopefully she doesn't keep all of those- she already has three grown ones outside. I don't understand why someone would want to have such disgusting animals, especially in their home!"

    After I heard that I stormed down the rest of the stairs, walked in to the brooder room and slammed the door shut. I was so unhappy to say the least! I keep the brooder VERY clean- and I only have 25 chicks down there. I clean out the brooder every two days or so. I even cleaned out the brooder and opened the window an hour before they got here! The only thing I can imagine her smelling is the pine shavings. She is a 'city girl' and only ever had an outside dog growing up and now my brother and her live in a tiny one bedroom apartment with no pets. Yes, animals can be dirty and smell. But don't ever stand in my home and judge me and my animals like that. My sister in law and I have had our differences but this just takes the cake. What would you do in this situation?
  2. Ut urbanchicken

    Ut urbanchicken New Egg

    Feb 29, 2012
    I would tell here if she didn't like the smell or the animales to stay away!! [​IMG] Sorry..
  3. Sonoran Silkies

    Sonoran Silkies Flock Mistress

    Jan 4, 2009
    Tempe, Arizona
    Since she did not talk directly to you, take the high road and ignore what she said. Smile, be pleasant and if the conversation leads that way, mention the things you enjoy about your birds, then change the subject to something you both enjoy. Realize that different people have different preferences for how they want to live. It truly does nothing to you that she does not share your interest in poultry. There are probably things that she enjoys that you are not interested in. So what?
  4. Anna_MN

    Anna_MN Chillin' With My Peeps

    Dec 4, 2011
    Princeton, MN
    I understand not sharing the same interests but to disrespect me and my passion in my own home is totally uncalled for. She knows that I heard her and just called me to apologize. I told her that she was being completely rude and needs a refresher course in etiquette- but I did accept her apology. She said she doesn't blame me for acting the way I did. Oh well; she can go fly a kite for all I care.

    On a happy note- my chicks are all growing happy and healthy and I am so proud of what I have accomplished in my chicken journey. This is so much fun! [​IMG]
  5. punk-a-doodle

    punk-a-doodle Chillin' With My Peeps

    Apr 15, 2011
    I'd look at it as a gift. You got to hear what sort of things she says in private, and learned that she may be the kind of person who will ask you for something (to see the chicks), only to put it down for whatever reason, be it insecurity or something else. It's also a good chance to educate. Indeed, I would have just stepped in and given a friendly little talk on chickens. It's awesome how much you can talk about a subject when someone else has their foot jammed in their mouth. ;) She recovered as best she could (with an apology).
  6. debilorrah

    debilorrah The Great Guru of Yap Premium Member

    You can actually use this as an opportunity to teach the ill informed woman about chickens. Completely ignore her remarks and make informative responses/comments to her directly addressing what she said. "That smell is the pine shavings, isn't it WONDERFUL?" " A lot of people think chickens are gross, but let me tell you about fresh eggs, and how their manure can be used".
  7. Mattemma

    Mattemma Overrun With Chickens

    Aug 12, 2009
    I think I could accept it better if she had said the negatives directly,but to be sweet as pie to your face and then turn around and dis you was what really would bother me. I would just keep the relationship limited. Not like you have to BFF's,and with her behavoir who would want to be?!!?!?

    Smile in your face and later tear you apart. She needs to become a better person and learn from this.

    Enjoy your chickies! I found that despite cleaning it WOULD smell.Lol,like when certain people use the bathroom,and that smell just lingers long after a flush.There is just so much you can do,but for those cute chickies it is so worth a few weeks.

    Your SIL would have a fit in my home,because I kept the playpen brooder in the laundry room right next to our bedroom. Even I complained about the stink,but it was worth a few weeks.Now the house is all good,and I have wonderful hens in the coop giving me big blue eggs.
  8. cassie

    cassie Overrun With Chickens

    Mar 19, 2009
    I don't think the chickens are an issue at all. I think you just got a wake up call about sister-in-law's basic character. Forewarned is forearmed.
    1 person likes this.
  9. NYboy

    NYboy Chillin' With My Peeps

    Nov 12, 2009
    White plains
    Sorry don't think she was being rude. She was talkng to her husband and didn't know you could hear . Some people just don't like animals, my sister is like that.
    1 person likes this.
  10. Anna_MN

    Anna_MN Chillin' With My Peeps

    Dec 4, 2011
    Princeton, MN
    This isn't the first time I've heard her complain about things behind my back right after she was smiley to my face. She has also complained about my other animals as well (which I don't understand because she loves animals). I have an 80lb black lab, a long hair cat, and a short hair cat. I vacuum every day because I am allergic to cats but love their personalities. I vacuum the carpet, hardwood, and furniture. My lab and short hair cat get brushed every other day. My long haired cat gets brushed everyday- otherwise she would mat up really bad. I also dust every other day (I'm really allergic to cats!). When she stayed in my home a couple months ago, she was playing with my cats and holding them and cuddling. She LOVES cats. Then later that day she was on the phone with her mom and I could hear her loud as day complaining about how my house is full of hair and her clothes are always full of hair. I'm like; what do you expect? You were just holding two cats! Bring a lint roller next time, geeze!!!

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