DS's Punishment

[rancher hicks]

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Me too. Kids have to realise there are consequences for their actions and some times they leave an impression. Everytime my son see his missing hand he remembers to keep his hands off my stuff. Just kidding.

 

[suzettex5]

If it was me and my son, (11 years) there would be no 4 wheeler for a month or 2 (except when it has to be used for work) AND he would be doing aaaaalllll those nasty chores involved with caring for those same animals to help him learn the VALUE of my animals. All my time and effort and energy spent has alot of value, as well as the birds themselves. I would use every opportunity that came up to remind him of their value as well. I would ask him to work off the price of feed for a month as well, not ask him to fork over cash.

I think your DS got caught up in the moment and forgot himself- if he has never done it before, I think a bit of lienency would be in order here. A severe tounge lashing coupled with chores and lessons in responsibilty usually go a long way. It sounds like he helps out quite a bit, so while I am not making excuses for his behavior, just suggesting you try not to get overly emotional over the situation. We all get very protective of our flocks, but try to keep in mind how wonderful and helpful he is in other areas, (he WAS helping when he commited the crime, and doing it for no allowance, which I think is wonderful) and try to make the punishment fit the crime.

I'm glad no animals were hurt- it could have been so much worse. I seriously doubt he was trying to hurt them, but he should invest some of his time, energy and money to understand how valuable all your animals are. He may think twice about endangering them again once he has a personal investment in them.

 

[twentynine]

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Okay!

So then--- why all the drama?

 

[teach1rusl]

Thirteen...or even 10...is certainly old enough to "know better." I don't know what's he's learned about how to treat animals in your family, because that would influence how tough I was on punishment. If treating animals humanely and kindly has been stressed (you can't assume kids know anything) in your family, at that age, IMO, a week is certainly not enough of a grounding from the 4 wheeler. But if you're just a typical family who has animals, cares for them, but animal issues never really come up, then it sounds fair. Either way, caring for (cleaning up after, feeding, etc.) the animals who were tormented sounds good too. Plus a good talking to about what was done of course... Personally, unless something like this has/had happened before, I think selling the 4-wheeler for a first offense (nobody injured) is a little extreme. Now, if I found out about other reckless behaviors on the 4-wheeler, it'd be history. Everyone screws up sometimes.

 

[herfrds]

He did some rock picking in the drive way and the yard. Also had to fill in some holes the dogs dug around the new house.
When he gets the 4-wheeler back he has some fencing to do.

What people don't understand is we didn't buy the 4-wheeler for him. He saved up his money for several years and paid for it himself. So selling it will not happen.

 

[debilorrah]

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I have been following along, and not commented, and wondered where the kid got the 4-wheeler. Not a typical toy!!! I suppose that since he paid for it, yet misused it, he can keep it, but I would say he should have restrictions on it for a long time to come.

Now, I get that he is kid. My next story leans towards the extreme that could happen if he is not properly chastised for doing something so harmful:

22 year old dad, out 4 wheelin - 13 month old child strapped to the back of the quad. Idiot tried to cross the river. He did not suceed. Him and his buddy stood there wondering what the hell to do as his child drown. The child was still in the car seat, dead, when they pulled the quad out of the water.

Quads and responsibility go hand in hand. You sound like a GREAT parent.... Maybe telling this story tonight will help your child realize the ramifications of not paying attention.

This story is true and happened last night.

 

[twentynine]

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Dang!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Even a cheap, 10 year old 4 wheeler goes for $2k or more around here.

I could have saved my entire allowance and all the money I ever made as a teenager, couldn't have bought half a 4-wheeler.

Becarefull when you punish that kid. At 13 years old he generated enough income to purchase a running 4-wheeler. He's got that much on the ball, we will all be working for him one day.

 

[Boyd]

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I agree with how you are handling this.

And I agree with twentynine's assessment as well. Perhaps a boyish lack of judgement and a touch of the Gremlin got into his blood for a moment. You have to do something.. but not be overly harsh.

 

[herfrds]

I know he's not looking forward to the fencing.

I checked the fence looking for a neighbors bull, he's got a lot of work to do.

We try to teach him responsiblity. I've always told him for every action there is a reaction.
He got paid a wage from us last year for all of the work he did. Raking hay and hauling the bales home on an NAA Ford tractor. If he hadn't done any work, no money.
Washes the trucks and numerous other things.
He wanted to buy a rabbit so he had to clean out both chicken houses for $20.

 

[colowyo0809]

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This, this right here is what I agree with 100%. All this allowance stuff if for the birds. Children are not entitled to money simply because they are there. Chores earn you money, just like a job. Growing up, if any of us kids wanted money we had to earn it. My family didn't have the money to just toss it around, but if you worked for it and earned it, you got it. If you shirked your chores, you lost your wages. And, if someone else did your chores for you, you paid them out of whatever money you had earned. Taught me quick to do my chores

Granted, back then it was things like doing dishes, taking out the garbage, vaccuuming, etc, but it worked. We didn't get paid for keeping or cleaning our rooms, or making the beds, that was stuff that just needed to be done. And if you helped with extra stuff like the lawn, leaves, etc you got extra chore money. If you broke a window, you helped pay for it. I think how you are handling this situation is the right one.

My advice, garnered from being raised by my mom, and comparing that to others, is to continue as you are, and definitly have him clean out the coops for a week or so. Don't make it so long that he comes to hate the birds, because that will give you another issue. But, long enough for the lesson to sink in is definitley appropriate, and maybe a discussion after the punishment period is over just to clairfy why you handed down the punishment you did, what you expect to see in the future, and a general guide to what the punishment escalation would be if he does it in the future, kind of like if get written up for doing something stupid at work

but, from the little I've seen of your parenting (not that you need anything from me) i'd say